"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

what to do after 1st date?

tjslove

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 22, 2005
Messages
25
Reaction score
0
k went on a first date last night and saw that the girl seemed excessively nervous......so I played it cool and just keep letting her talk about herself. At the end of the date it ended with a hug and her saying she would call me?

What is next DJs
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

WORKEROUTER

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 9, 2003
Messages
1,514
Reaction score
9
Location
WA
On the first date, have fun. I steer clear of lunch dates, coffee dates, theatre dates,ect. for the first dates.

You should be having a good time with her and she should. THAT'S IT. Don't overanalyze things, don't worry about making your "move." Because remember, on a first date, you need to establish a CONNECTION and you need to establish COMFORT. Once these two are met, you're set. The best way to do this is to have fun.

You say she was nervous. Why? Or are you just over-analyzing things? Either way, remember, comfort is your goal.

She's going to call you? Bad move. You need to establish some control of the situation; if a relationship was a car, then you're the driver!

This means that at the end of the date, when dropping her off, you'll get some natural KINO going (maybe put your hands on her hips), establish eye contact, mention you had a good time, and tell her you'll call her.

When an open slot comes up, and you feel like going out again, you'll call her and, assuming your first date went well, you'll go out again. Simple as that.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,481
Reaction score
65
Location
Galt's Gulch
Don't wait around for her call, seems like it won't happen. Keep sarging so that you don't get one-itis.

Oh yeah, she seemed nervous so you left her to do most of the talking? That doesn't seem quite right.
 

Q-Pid

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 11, 2005
Messages
526
Reaction score
3
Call her in a few days and set up the second date. If she flakes or puts up obstacles just say "I know your nervous..." and take it from there. :D
 

Warrior Princess

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 30, 2005
Messages
35
Reaction score
0
Age
43
Location
In your pants New York/New Jersey
How exactly was she nervous? Was she sweating, shaking or stuttering? To be honest, there was no point to my question, I just like to visualize things.

On a serious note, take her to a crowded place. She shouldn't be nervous then.


Good luck!


Meg
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

Dr Box

Don Juan
Joined
Sep 15, 2005
Messages
133
Reaction score
0
Age
45
Location
Brisbane Australia
Originally posted by WORKEROUTER
On the first date, have fun. I steer clear of lunch dates, coffee dates, theatre dates,ect. for the first dates.
So True, It took me a while to realise this but when I did massive change in results.
 

Sophomakhos

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 24, 2005
Messages
72
Reaction score
0
Age
39
Location
Oxford, United Kingdom
This is odd; many people recommend coffee dates for the first date, and yet others say to steer clear of it. Personally I find that coffee is a very good first date, and that the 'fun' dates should follow up to supplement.
 

Tyron

Don Juan
Joined
Sep 1, 2005
Messages
141
Reaction score
1
There aren't any rules as to where you should go on a first date. Girl, time of week, your schedule etc everything effects your decision so there isn't one solution that will always work.

I think that coffee dates are ok for a first date as long as you arent putting any pressure on it. I mean, just say that she can come hang around with you when you are on town and you can grab a coffee etc. These dates don't last long and gives enough time for both to further develop the first impression. If she isnt what you are looking for it's easy to say bye and move on whatever you were doing, and vice versa.
 

[o_0]

Banned
Joined
Oct 28, 2005
Messages
139
Reaction score
0
Age
46
try reading my threads on the tips forum.
mainly never let girl tell she will call back.you have to make move.
 

doommarine44

New Member
Joined
Oct 30, 2005
Messages
8
Reaction score
0
her telling you she will call gave her power, and should tell you she doesnt trust you or is insecure about you or her
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

flexion_

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 13, 2003
Messages
1,617
Reaction score
10
Age
56
You always call her for the first few dates. She might have been nervous because she liked you.

Now the coffee date or no coffee date. In reality if the girl is really attracted to you a date to the local prison would still work.

I think if you have some rapport established then a coffee date works because you'll have some things to talk about. If its say a blind date or someone you don't know well you might consider some action type date so there is something else going on in the background for you both to connect with or establish rapport on. Otherwise you tend to get those "interview feeling" type dates.
 
Top