"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

what to do about trust issues

theoneandonlyjay

New Member
Joined
Feb 5, 2009
Messages
3
Reaction score
0
ive always had trust issues... i dont know why


thats a big reason why i have sexual anxiety, and and never do get with girls even if they come up to me and start flirting with me.

i hardly ever talk to people and never tell them anything about myself unless ive known them for a while and trust them

is there anything i can do about it?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

I'm in the Mood

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 3, 2008
Messages
702
Reaction score
17
Location
Cloud 9
I'll give it to ya real simple.

If you want to meet someone, you have to go out of your way to talk to them and learn something about them.
I know it's not like you don't trust everybody you see, but you have to get to know someone before you can trust them with personal things.

Just be like "Can I trust you?" and take it from there. If she seems interested in gaining your trust, you've got hers and if you notice her interest in gaining your trust, you want to reward her for it by validating her. It could even be as simple as "Thank you, I knew I could trust you."

Try it out for yourself, but you must raise the issue be very honest about it if trust is an issue for you.
 

intrextrovert

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 30, 2008
Messages
186
Reaction score
1
You have to work out those issues man. Why don't you trust people? What do you think they'll do? What's the worst they can do? Tell everyone how you went on a cool vacation a while back? Tell everybody you had a lazy weekend last week and didn't do anything? Give everyone the big scoop on how you enjoy margaritas and long walks on the beach? What are you trusting people you just talk to/flirt with?

As it gets deeper and bf/gf i can kinda understand. But w/o trust **** won't work. I don't know what you imagine, but again, what's the worst someone can do, and why would they?
 

Desert Fox

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 16, 2008
Messages
786
Reaction score
22
I'm the same way man. I always kick a girl out RIGHT AFTER we have sex because I'm afraid she will murder me in my sleep...creepy!
 
Top