What The Hell Am I Doing -- You Ever Get Like This?

[Knicknack]

Gio... We tried to help you in the other thread. When everything around you seems wrong, chances are it's not the people and things around you that are wrong, it's YOU.

re-evaluate yourself. i won't help you any further, son.

 

[The Edge]

Re: Re: Re: What The Hell Am I Doing -- You Ever Get Like This?

Originally posted by Giovanni Casanova
Yes, it's a real shame that I'm not interested in meaningless, feelingless, empty bullsh*t flings.

That's a huge flaw, obviously.

And I must say, it was very perceptive of you to figure out that if I was just more interested in worthless, pointless, hollow one-night stands, that I wouldn't be so bored by all of this. Wow!

Super-terrific!

Spare me GIO, the psycho analytical bullshytt I can do without. You forget that all the knowledge and societal behaviors you have aquired in your 20-something years on this planet will never truly wash away the fact that you are a man, with a koch that has needs.

What you are going through can be pshyco-analyzed with the hogwash guys have written on this thread all day long. The truth is you are bored, and you need to experience being in a RELATIONSHIP with more than one woman at the same time. The one woman gimmick has carved you into a metrosexual puppet longing for something that does not exsist..

Proof.. You're on this board posting/helping on how to attract women.

Edge

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

Originally posted by Knicknack
Gio... We tried to help you in the other thread. When everything around you seems wrong, chances are it's not the people and things around you that are wrong, it's YOU.

re-evaluate yourself. i won't help you any further, son.

No, in the other thread you told me that I wouldn't be successful with women unless I was in complete control of making every single detail of every single little decision, right down to where we sat in a restaurant. My problem has not been a lack of success with women, per se. Not recently, anyway.

My problem, I would compare it to being a guy who just won the lottery. You've got all this money, all these possibilities. But when you sit there trying to think of something to buy, you're completely blank. Which is completely f*cked up, but there it is. You try to think of something you could buy that would excite you, but every idea you come up with is just, blah.

You're over there telling me, "You'll never have any money unless you slaughter a chicken and dance around a campfire."

And I'm sitting here saying, "I won the lottery, dipsh*t. Getting money isn't a problem, I gots me some money. I'm just bored by it."

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

Re: Re: Re: Re: What The Hell Am I Doing -- You Ever Get Like This?

Originally posted by The Edge
Spare me GIO, the psycho analytical bullshytt I can do without. You forget that all the knowledge and societal behaviors you have aquired in your 20-something years on this planet will never truly wash away the fact that you are a man, with a koch that has needs.

What you are going through can be pshyco-analyzed with the hogwash guys have written on this thread all day long. The truth is you are bored, and you need to experience being in a RELATIONSHIP with more than one woman at the same time. The one woman gimmick has carved you into a metrosexual puppet longing for something that does not exsist..

Proof.. You're on this board posting/helping on how to attract women.

Edge

Either you have no clue what I'm talking about or you do and you're purposely being a moron. First of all, I'm not in a committed relationship right now. I went out with one girl last week, I'm going out with someone completely different this week. So the problem isn't a lack of variety.

Listen to what I'm saying. I go out with a girl on Friday night, she's pretty attractive. And smart. And I get her talking and laughing and everything's just f*cking wonderful, right? Except I don't think so, because I'm sitting across the table thinking, 'Is this all there is? I mean, is this ALL there f*cking IS!?'

And it's not that she's not a great girl -- she's great, she really is. But at the end of the day I just listened to her talk about her family and about her recent trip to the Bahamas and I don't see the f*cking point, I just don't see it.

Another date or two, and maybe I wake up the next morning with her walking out of my bathroom with a towel on and nothing else. And that's nice, I won't deny that, but what then?

Here's the problem in a nutshell: I'm not into temporary things, not into one-night stands, not into short-term flings. It's like building a house. You can build a house out of sand, and it can be a really nice house but it'll only last until the first time it rains. So spending a lot of time and effort building that house is f*cking retarded, because the benefits don't outweigh the costs. You're better off spending more time and more energy building something that will withstand the forces of time and nature. The problem is that at the moment, I can't seem to build a house I want to live in.

 

[BrWnSugaMan]

Here is my guess at what is wrong with Giovanni. In his past, he dated one special woman who was a total knockout both physically and mentally. Something happened and that relationship went down hill. After that relationship went down hill, Giovanni needed to rationalize to himself why he did not need this total knockout anymore. If he had failed to rationalize why he did not need her, then he would be going through the distress of missing her. The stress that he is going through now is an external projection of his internal repressed desire to be with the girl from his past that blew his mind away both physically and mentally. The girls that he is seeing now do not compare to the knockout girl from his past, but it is too painful for him to admit this to himself. The girls that he is seeing now do not compare to the knockout from his past, but this idea of losing the “best thing that ever happened” to him is too much to cope with. Instead, these negative feelings become projected to the current women in his life who do not meet up to the standards of the former knockout.

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

Originally posted by BrWnSugaMan
The girls that he is seeing now do not compare to the knockout from his past, but this idea of losing the “best thing that ever happened” to him is too much to cope with.

Nice guess, but 100% wrong. The last girl I was with for a long time (and whom I was engaged to) was not the "best thing that ever happened" to me. I loved her, but life goes on. The girls that I'm dating now are at least equal to her.

 

[squirrels]

Heh, I think the bottom-line is that men were never meant to analyze relationships and doing so just drives us to melancholy.

Look at it this way...do you have some close friends? Think of one. How do you feel about your relationship with him?

If you're like me, you probably had to think about it a little bit. I mean, you know what you like about a person, you know what you DON'T like, but you don't really feel a need to define (or try to shape) the context of the "relationship." It just takes care of itself.

It should be the same way with women, just with sex. I think you're thinking about it too much, planning "scenarios", analyzing "best-case situations", evaluating your feelings, trying to decide what shape you want a relationship to take.

That all needs to go. Your mind and spirit could do so much more for you devoted to something else. Just associate with women and let it lead where it leads. Stop analyzing Kate and Nicole. Just hang out with them. If you enjoy her company, be friends with her. If she turns you on, then lay your mack down on her. If she bores you, find something/someone else to do.

But stop worrying about "where this is going." You might've had a "bad acid trip" with a previous girl and you're concerned about where this one will go, but when you come right down to it, it's going to go that way whether you like it or not, and all you can do is either buckle in and ride or find someone else. So stop stressing over it. It takes all the fun out of it.

 

[Kidquick]

I would recommend backing up off the scene for awhile, take a little break to do some of the thing s you've never really had time to do - spend some time finding yourself a little - I've found that devoting alot of my time and thoughts to another person can be emotionaly, financially, and physically draining, and I'm often the most happy when all I have to worry about is myself.

 

[myfriendblu]

Originally posted by Giovanni Casanova
Wow, and if I needed your help, I would be so heartbroken.

Wow, and you certainly sound like the most fun and interesting person in the world to be around.

Maybe the problem isn't the girls, but its YOU.

I know alot of people that need drama in their relationships (dating single moms/crazy bitc hes/girls that are high maintenance/drama seeking girls/attention whors). Its almost like they feel bored with a normal girl. They NEED the drama. Hey, sounda a bit like yourslef maybe?

Relax. Just be glad you don't have any past ties with your previous relationships. Maybe you need to fix YOU

I think that maybe, sometimes you can be a whiny little brat that just needs to act up and grow a pair.

 

[pulchritudinous chum]

I read every reply- This post helped me out too, thx guys. As much as I hate to admit it, I think player_supreme has the best point.

When you date only a few women you will fall prey to misconceptions and bitter downward spirals of attitudes which will block your ability to meet other women.

Doesn't get any better than that. How do you quote btw?

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

Originally posted by myfriendblu
Wow, and you certainly sound like the most fun and interesting person in the world to be around.

Maybe the problem isn't the girls, but its YOU.

First of all, I was talking to PS, and he took it exactly the way I intended it. So suck it.

Secondly, yeah, I'm a sarcastic assh*le. But there is not exactly a shortage of girls wanting to go out with me, that isn't the problem and I've said that already on this thread.

Third, I never said there was anything wrong with the girls per se, I have said that they just aren't doing anything for me... I am bored by them. I even said, "it's not that she's not a great girl -- she's great", so either you aren't paying attention or you're ignoring what I've said so that you can fit it into what you want.

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

Originally posted by pulchritudinous chum
When you date only a few women you will fall prey to misconceptions and bitter downward spirals of attitudes which will block your ability to meet other women.

That may be, but that's not my situation. I've dated a number of girls, they're just all blending together. I am quite capable of seeing the good points of these girls, but none of them seem like girls I'd want as anything more than friends, and I'm looking for more than that.

How do you quote btw?

At the bottom of every post, there's a little button that says "quote". That'll do it.

 

[iqqi]

hey gio. you know, you don't have to date or be interested in women. just leave it alone for now. as a matter of fact, don't even ATTEMPT to date anyone, until you meet someone that right off the bat intrigues you. that you HAVE to see again. it's like forcing yourself to eat when you aren't hungry. if you keep doing it you are going to fcuk up your appetite. just let it go until your appetite comes out of nowhere and reminds you of your hunger.

don't shun women, just don't try and collect them right now. let it be. do your own thing. i've been there.

 

[Matt ala Casanova]

Originally posted by Giovanni Casanova

And I'm sitting here saying, "I won the lottery, dipsh*t. Getting money isn't a problem, I gots me some money. I'm just bored by it."

For real?

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

Originally posted by Matt ala Casanova
For real?

Metaphorically speaking, of course, but yeah. These girls are great. A lot of guys on this site would love to be able to just talk to these girls. So it's like I hit the lottery. Some of the guys here are telling me I'm having problem getting women... that isn't the problem. I've got them, it's just that I'm like... *yawn*.

Does that make sense?

No, you're right -- it doesn't to me, either.

 

[C-Mack]

Originally posted by Giovanni Casanova


dipsh*t. ."

A moderator who cuss's at other people. I guess supreme was right you are an ass! No wonder your having so much trouble in life. Your own thoughts of yourself are too big for your britches.

Your ego is in your own way fool. Learn this lesson my good sir and you shall prosper once again. But, you will probably send me a stupid reply which I will never read and waste even more of your wastefully full life.

I agree with supreme 1000% you are dumb as an ox!

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

Originally posted by C-Mack
A moderator who cuss's at other people. I guess supreme was right you are an ass! No wonder your having so much trouble in life. Your own thoughts of yourself are too big for your britches.

Your ego is in your own way fool. Learn this lesson my good sir and you shall prosper once again. But, you will probably send me a stupid reply which I will never read and waste even more of your wastefully full life.

I agree with supreme 1000% you are dumb as an ox!

 

[DEKKA]

yeah ive felt this from time to time before and it's because when you shed all your old bad habits and really learn how to act around women you start to be much more real with yourself and what you want.

you also become much more selective. since you are being real with yourself, instead of letting yourself get dragged into fake love, you acknoledge that this or that woman isn't going to end up with you in the long haul.

for some guys they don't want the long haul anyways so it's not a problem. for others they just get jaded and it takes a lot more to get them excited. thats how i am sometimes.

one thing that i've found that would help a lot and helps me not to feel that way is to ONLY approach or get with women that really vibe with you from the start. i dunno if you see what im talking about but probably only 1 out of like a couple hundred women do i actually have excellent vibes with from the start.

also, maybe you have raised your standards internally but not raised them externally yet. maybe you just need to look for a hotter/wittier/richer/funner chick. high standards are a very good thing for men to have. when you settle you're not being honest with yourself and it's very hard to feel something you just plain don't feel.

-J

 

[Oxide]

I agree with supreme 1000% you are dumb as an ox!

congrats gio, you have finally risen to my level


I dont know how many women do you have to bang for this burnout to occur, but for me, i have the phone number burnout lately.

Through out this year, i have gotten more numbers than i can count, and after one flake to another, to another, to another... then a date...then a date that goes nowhere, then another date that is retarded, then girls who do not want to seem slutty, then slut defence once agains, then flake, flake, sex, flake, flake, flake... i just look back and go "damn... is this **** worth it?
Testing girls 1 by 1, if you are compatible... takes a **** loads of effort on your part....

i dont know, may be i just need another kick in the ass, but the idea of the "one FUN girl to be with" is growing on my mind very fast.

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

A lot of good points on this thread, from oxide, dekka, iqqi, kidquick, clooney, bishop, pimp-sicle, squirrels, M.A.C., slickster, page, and paradox.

I've got the date tonight, I won't cancel. But if I don't feel anything on this thing, then I think I'm gonna go on hiatus for a little while from this whole thing.

I also want to clear up a couple of things that some people seem to be having some trouble grasping.

1. I'm not having trouble getting women. I know I've said that a couple of times on this thread, but I keep running into idiots who are trying to cite this thread as proof that I can't get women. Obviously there's a failure in the reading comprehension department there.
2. My life doesn't suck, and I'm not depressed about my life. My life is great for the most part. I have a nice apartment, very cool friends, a good job. Some people apparently see me write a post about one thing I would like to improve, and immediately assume that my life is in the toilet. It isn't.[/list=1]