"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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What next?

Eph

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Here's the deal. I felt like I needed to be more aggressive with a plate of mine. I've been doing nothing (With her), and decided to take action. My first plan was to establish some rapport with her by using something we both have in common: music. We both write songs, and I decided I'd use it to my advantage. I've been working on a song since the weekend and since I've never been good with making choruses, I thought I'd let her do it. Problem is at the moment, I'm having second thoughts about because of what the song is about: lost love, not getting the one you want, etc.

At first I was thinking of the possible (if I got extremely lucky; then again I'm pretty lucky but besides the point) benefits: it would show her a side I don't let others see, establish some sort of emotional connection (looking for a LTR with her), etc. But right now I'm thinking the negatives outweigh the (possible) goods. I was thinking about it earlier and it just seems now that I was in an AFC/Beta/whatever you wanna call it mindset.

Thing is, she already "accepted the offer", and I'm supposed to message her today. So right now, I can proceed as planned by taking a huge gamble (not really a fan of unnecessary risks) and send her the song so she can write a chorus for it, or I can either find another song or try to make another one by tomorrow and show her in person then.

Should I even be considering such a huge gamble on something that (Short-term) will result in so little and possibly, maybe (long-term) so much? Should I be playing with what possibly little attraction (and I know she has at least the minimum amount I could work with) she has for me? I guess my biggest "go with it" point is the fact she's (to my knowledge) deeply religious and my main "are you fvcking crazy" point is she's a woman, and even if religious she gets into fights (with other girls) every once in a while.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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Eph

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Its not lost love in general. It's a little more specific to my life, because I want my music to be more relate-able (to anyone, not just her). I've always been a fan of story-telling through song, so does this change your opinion or do you still think I'm over-thinking (which I probably am)?
 

goundra

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is there some other woman named in the song, or something? change the name, if so. what you scared of, she'll 'steal" your song? that's the mark of the complete amateur.
 

Eph

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No names in the song, other than my own. And I could care less if she "stole" it or not, I write for fun not profit.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Eph

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Well ultimately decided against it and just rewrote about something else. It was about something I've wanted to write about for a while now, so either way it was fine. Messaged her at about 9 (she told me to message her (later) at around 3 but I was busy having fun) and while it lasted I was getting quick responses.

Me: You still up shorty? - 9:10
Her: -___- shorty? My name's _____. And why do you want me to write you a chorus? - 9:12
Me: Maybe I don't, maybe I just wanted a reason to talk to you - 9:26 (I admit it, I was stalling here)
Her: -___- Lame ass. You don't even talk to me in class so don't try to talk to me on facebook. - 9:27
Me: You told me to facebook you lol. We could of talked after class. - 9:31
Me: Seriously though, write me a chorus. - 9:41
(No response)
* Indicates paraphrased, slightly better grammatical, or rewritten slang.
She is pretty much the only person I don't talk to during our one class together. So, I've got some social proof. She seemed to be at least a little interested when she first talked to me. She also messes with me from time to time, as do I.

Tried to revive our previous conversation about her writing me a chorus today but when I jokingly asked if she had even started it, she just gave me a blatant no. I took her saying, "you don't even talk to me in class..." as her "inviting" me to talk to her more during class, but I don't know. I know she can be fun/playful, etc but it seems like she has a high initial ASD. In fact I know she does, her type always does. What should my next move be?
 

TheException

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"you don't even talk to me in class..." as her "inviting" me to talk to her more during class, but I don't know.

Wrong. Id say sh1t test, and you failed. Id of said something along the lines of "Thats because i just cling to every word out of the professors mouth, straight A students just arent born that way"
 

Eph

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Some time before or after i was thinking i should have said, "you don't talk to me during class. Takes two to tango". For future reference, good or bad? And what should i do now? I don't get much time during class to really talk to her but i do have time during our lunch.
 

Eph

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Hmm how should I reopen and get a conversation started? I'm no good at opening but can usually keep the ball rolling once its started. I only know of two things we have in common and one didn't really work out. Only other thing I know of is a tv show we both like.
 
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