Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

What is Your Stance on Getting into Committed Relationships with Single Moms?

indiff

Don Juan
Joined
Sep 6, 2020
Messages
57
Reaction score
53
Age
47
Me personally I have no interest in them, I also don't judge unless the man claims to be an alpha with options and he goes from single mom to single mom (ie Corey Wayne). Then I'm like...WTF man? :rolleyes:


I don't know man, I've realized it's better not to make generalizations like this because everyone is different and wants different things out of life. I have a player friend my age who's been dating a single mom an year older than him with a 12yrs old daughter for almost a year now. He says that he can really talk and connect with her, unlike the other girls he's been with. Who am I to judge him and say >man, you're a fool, you gotta get yourself a 23yrs old virgin<, just because that's my preference? :rolleyes:
I discovered the same about Donovan Sharpe too
 

Divorced w 3

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 20, 2022
Messages
2,037
Reaction score
1,139
You are underestimating the demand for childless 30 somethings and even 30 something single moms. Male thirst is at epidemic and pandemic levels.
I don’t think I am. Speaking for myself, I don’t see the single 30’s holding too firm. I’m in the trading business and there’s a universal truth in auction markets (buyers vs sellers)… you can offer whatever prices you want but you don’t print a sale until some agrees to buy. You can be a thirsty, various aged / economic situated male but that doesn’t mean you’re necessarily bringing what she needs to the table. The 30’s that I have talked to, current excluded, have been pretty available. Admittedly not scientific whatsoever.
 

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
12,065
Reaction score
10,348
Single moms are losers.
If you hang around losers you are a loser.
If you have kids yourself its diffrent as i think ppl with kids should ONLY date ppl with kids.
A lot of single moms are losers. They made bad decisions on the person to marry when they had a lot of options.

It's a bigger problem when childless men end up with single moms of children under 18. There are childless men thirsty enough to make that a reality. Also, there are plenty of single dads who end up with single moms. I understand that arrangement more than the childless man-single mom arrangement. Single dads have more baggage than childless men so they often have to take on a single mom. There are some odd relational dynamics that exist when single dads and single moms commit to a long term relationship. The children from the prior relationship don't like the new partner or the new partner's kids.

A more common relationship now are age 50+ couples with both sets of partners having adult children. The two sets of adult children don't like their parents' new arrangement much either. Most act tolerant of it to some degree for the sake of keeping family peace but don't like it.

You are underestimating the demand for childless 30 somethings and even 30 something single moms. Male thirst is at epidemic and pandemic levels.
But who's actually getting into marriage with those single moms? Have you seen those guys? Most men don't have anything going on for them, so the guys getting into that they have even less things going on for them, total life losers.

My "gf" she's a single mom, I allowed myself to be called a bf until I don't get what I want, excitement, parties, travelling, her paying for stuff, experiencing 3somes (not yet but she's open to it and says thing like that when we're having secs), I never stopped approaching other women, not the most loyal thing to do, but commitment is just a word, like women branch swing, men should do the same without guilt, and besides, women prefer to share a high value guy than settling for a loser like Rollo says, until some point.

To me I think if a guy have a clear understanding that the relationship will never be as good as with a childless woman, that he shouldn't get married, never get her pregnant, that she's for having fun only, that there should be a clear separation between her kids and you, that if she's treating you like a king while he's trying to get other women, where is the downside of that? When he's ready to have a family he simply drops her and focus on finding a woman without children.
I don't think it is solely loser males who get into committed relationships with single moms.

You are in some quasi relationship with a single mom. It's more than plate status. Men don't take plates on vacations to Puerto Rico from the United States.

Are you making plans to drop her and spend more effort on childless women? You're 33, so a childless woman 25-32 is a realistic prospect for you.

I think plenty of decent, normie tier men end up in relationships with single moms. Some are single fathers themselves but there are childless men who get into relationships with them.

You are underestimating the demand for childless 30 somethings and even 30 something single moms. Male thirst is at epidemic and pandemic levels.
I don’t think I am. Speaking for myself, I don’t see the single 30’s holding too firm. I’m in the trading business and there’s a universal truth in auction markets (buyers vs sellers)… you can offer whatever prices you want but you don’t print a sale until some agrees to buy. You can be a thirsty, various aged / economic situated male but that doesn’t mean you’re necessarily bringing what she needs to the table. The 30’s that I have talked to, current excluded, have been pretty available. Admittedly not scientific whatsoever.

While I think this was a childless woman with 1,946 swipes in her queue, I don't think it's unrealistic for a single mom to have 700-1,000 pending swipes.

If a single mom gets on a swipe app and has 700-1,000 pending swipes, there will still be enough men in that group who will commit to her for an extended period.

Female abundance is unreal.

There are a large percentage of men who are completely sexless. Some of these sexless men would take a single mom as an relationship option.
 

Dr.Suave

Moderator
Joined
Mar 6, 2017
Messages
3,596
Reaction score
3,971
A lot of single moms are losers. They made bad decisions on the person to marry when they had a lot of options.

It's a bigger problem when childless men end up with single moms of children under 18. There are childless men thirsty enough to make that a reality.
Not all of them, but a lot of them. I just have to agree. I like your views on this.
 

alvinkels

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 19, 2022
Messages
109
Reaction score
87
Mum was a single fortunately I didn't grow up like others but I certainly know the effect it had. My mum married earlier I was like 6 years but I swear I will never deal with an single no matter what. If we are friends I can be a good uncle to the kids because their innocent but I will never deal with a single mum no matter what her got her into it.
 

EyeBRollin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 18, 2015
Messages
10,626
Reaction score
8,602
Age
34
The same could be said for divorced men as well, so it's not gender related although my dad divorced my mom and was a great man, definitely NOT a loser and he chose wisely the second time round.
Not the same. When a woman chooses a poor mate she completely ruins her life and it’s not salvageable. Men can always start over after a failed marriage.
 

Divorced w 3

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 20, 2022
Messages
2,037
Reaction score
1,139
Not the same. When a woman chooses a poor mate she completely ruins her life and it’s not salvageable. Men can always start over after a failed marriage.
When a woman *has kids* with someone and loses the relationship it’s not salvageable. If there is a childless divorce it’s not anything to worry about.
 

EyeBRollin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 18, 2015
Messages
10,626
Reaction score
8,602
Age
34
When a woman *has kids* with someone and loses the relationship it’s not salvageable. If there is a childless divorce it’s not anything to worry about.
True, though even in the case of no kids she still loses that valuable time. Let’s say she was married for only one year. She loses the 2 years prior to the marriage, the 1 year in marriage, 1 year finalizing the divorce, 1 year “healing” from the marriage, then another 1 year going through her “single” hve phase. That’s minimum 6 years right there…
 

EyeBRollin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 18, 2015
Messages
10,626
Reaction score
8,602
Age
34
@EyeBRollin
She doesn't "lose" if she learned something valuable from it no matter how long it lasted.

My belief albeit not a very popular one round here, which is fine and I accept even though I disagree.
Failed relationships are nothing but trauma for women. The fewer she has, the better off she is for a lifelong partnership with her husband. There are no moral victories here.

Men, avoid single mothers like the plague.
 

Dr.Suave

Moderator
Joined
Mar 6, 2017
Messages
3,596
Reaction score
3,971
After many years, he is still unable to maintain a LTR with any woman, he is 100% commitment averse, unable to bond.
So basically she turned him into a plate spinner?
 

Divorced w 3

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 20, 2022
Messages
2,037
Reaction score
1,139
True, though even in the case of no kids she still loses that valuable time. Let’s say she was married for only one year. She loses the 2 years prior to the marriage, the 1 year in marriage, 1 year finalizing the divorce, 1 year “healing” from the marriage, then another 1 year going through her “single” hve phase. That’s minimum 6 years right there…
True also. The timeline is maybe a bit longer in your view though. So the healing, divorce process are possibly wrapped into the same timeline. The dating can start sooner than a year although often not recommended.

I do agree though, generally, stay away from someone whose recently in the process of divorce, and if you must go out with them, find out what kind of work they’ve done on themselves, how long it’s been, and listen to see if any bitterness comes through about the ex which is a bad sign.

speaking for myself, I needed almost a year. I went out and had non committed sex though over the course of the process. I tried dating once in the summer and was called out immediately on it for the aforementioned.
 

Divorced w 3

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 20, 2022
Messages
2,037
Reaction score
1,139
@EyeBRollin
She doesn't "lose" if she learned something valuable from it no matter how long it lasted.

My belief albeit not a very popular one round here, which is fine and I accept even though I disagree.

Personally, I take away something valuable from all my experiences, positive and negative.

It would also depend on how resilient she is and mentally/emotionally stable in general.

Again jmo, speaking from personal experience when LTRs have ended and wouldn't imagine it would be any different if lord forbid my marriage ended for whatever reason.

I'm about as resilient as they come and this has been time tested many times. I don't think I'm alone in that either.

And it can be the same for men, I know men including one of my brothers who became completely destroyed after his college relationship ended. She dumped him.

After many years, he is still unable to maintain a LTR with any woman, he is 100% commitment averse, unable to bond.

This has been said so many times, but life, love, relationships, human beings etc are never black and white.

"That which does not kill you makes you stronger." -- Friedrich Nietzsche
When did you get divorced?
 

Whydomyeyeshurt

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 22, 2022
Messages
34
Reaction score
13
Age
46
I currently have two plates spinning. One is a single mom and the other one has no kids. I like them both so we'll see where this goes. I also have two kids of my own. I was seeing a woman briefly who had a kid but the dad was a deadbeat and never around so she was always busy with her kid. Logistically, we never really had time to hang out together so that plate broke.

A boundary I set with any woman I'm seeing that has kids is that I will not meet your children for a very long time. This is for two reasons. One, I happen to like kids and I don't want to enter into the emotional landscape of coming to really like someone else's children, but then having to end the relationship. Also, I don't think it's appropriate to enter into those children's lives as a potential, positive masculine presence only to leave shortly thereafter.

This sort of thins the field to moms who have a very robust co-parenting plan with their ex so they have more time for me. My kids live in another city so while I talk to them on the phone daily I only see them every other weekend. So I myself also have more time.

In my view a benefit to dating other parents, and someone else mentioned this above, is that we're in similar phases of life and there's a lot to relate to.

But just as somebody else said I don't understand why a childless man would get together with a mom. A buddy of mine has done that and has become a total blue pill cuck. The woman even kept her pedophile ex-husband out of jail so she could still get child support from him. On top of that, she came to gain access to my buddy's house So it's a real cluster.
 

Solomon

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 28, 2008
Messages
5,020
Reaction score
2,053
Location
Inside her mind
I think dating single moms whose kids are out of the household or grown is circumstantial
If you're a man 40+ it's gonna be unavoidable to deal with them
Me personally I have never been in a full relationship with a single mom outside of FWB
It just never works most single mothers are broke, have baby daddy drama, no time or all of the above
Even if you find one that has all her shyt together there is always something off i.e. personality, long distance, desperate(typically those are the ones that want you to meet their kids right away a huge RED FLAG and no no for me or wanna be exclusives) or something else
A lot of single mothers in their 40s just want some Good D lol

To many single women out here without kids but as you get older you gotta be realistic

Just my opinion
 

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
12,065
Reaction score
10,348
A lot of single mothers in their 40s just want some Good D lol
Recreational use only. No need to commit there.

If you're a man 40+ it's gonna be unavoidable to deal with them

To many single women out here without kids but as you get older you gotta be realistic
I think even an older single, childless man can demand to only date childless single women in an exclusive committed relationship. I also see this changing as the Millennials are starting to enter their 40s. Millennial childlessness at age 40 is increasing but is still difficult to find. I know more 34-40 year old Millennials with children than without children but my social circle is not a representative sample.

When I go out in the real world and do approach sessions, I am less likely to encounter childless, 30 somethings who are willing to field my approach than going through a swipe app and seeing a lot of childless 30 something. On the swipe app, it's all an illusion. Those childless 30 something still usually won't swipe right on me. It's difficult to get right swipes.

I can identify with the point of view that a late 30s/early 40s man is more likely in real world activity to encounter prospects close to his own age who already have kids. Older guys today (45-64 in 2023) are still more likely to deal with women with kids in their interactions, and the 50+ set is likely dealing with similarly aged women with children who are 18+, some of who are at least partially independent.
 

tightgrp

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 15, 2021
Messages
140
Reaction score
82
Age
54
You are underestimating the demand for childless 30 somethings and even 30 something single moms. Male thirst is at epidemic and pandemic levels.
And it is quite apparent in the way women think and act nowadays.
 

tightgrp

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 15, 2021
Messages
140
Reaction score
82
Age
54
Truth is, single moms have been humbled.
Bullsh*t. They marry themselves to their kids, animals, job, take from the plethora of symps willing to play second, third, fourth, tenth fiddle for the promise of poosy, ride that c0ck carousel and pretend to be wholesome just like all the rest.
 
Top