"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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What is intimacy? (after redpill)

Sega Genesis

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It's not possible with a chad, narcissist, or sociopath. And it's usually those with a strong, natural toxic game who attract women.
I'm not sure @jhonny9546 .

I think a Chad can if he met the right woman who created a 'safe space' for him to open up without fear of her judgment.

A narcissist? I don't know enough about narcissism to say. What I do know is every person is narcissistic to some degree, it exists on a spectrum with some possessing more narcissistic traits than others.

Those who score high on that spectrum who possess certain characteristics (such as grandiosity, entitlement and lack of empathy) I suppose would be diagnosed as having NPD as it's defined....but even then they may be capable of a deep bond, connection, intimacy IF they were to meet a woman who again created that safe space.

I honestly don't know but I'd like to think so.

In any event it IS hard for many people and may involve lots of push/pulls until such time true Trust between them is achieved. NOT easy even for the most secure of people... in my experience.

Could it be that same feeling you get when you talk to your therapist? (He doesn't judge you, but he gets you talking and gives you advice.)
No 'intimacy' isn't anything like speaking with a therapist.

It's not about giving advice, it's about sharing, listening with an open mind and heart, love and acceptance.

If you're seeking advice or a solution to whatever you're feeling and experiencing, that is when you speak to a therapist.
 
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"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Sega Genesis

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A gal who makes a conscious effort to ensure her man isn't coming home to a f-c-ing slaughterhouse every night...
Lol you have such a way with words Baron ;)... but I agree. In fact for some of us it doesn't even take a 'conscious effort'.

It comes naturally, a part of her nature (even- tempered, low drama). Assuming she loves, respects and admires him.
 

Manure Spherian

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there will never be true intimacy in the relationship?
So living with, caring for, her caring for me, time spent with extended family, raising kids together, and screwing, might be false intimacy with my wife?
 

Manure Spherian

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Lol you have such a way with words Baron ;)... but I agree. In fact for some of us it doesn't even take a 'conscious effort'.

It comes naturally, a part of her nature (even- tempered, low drama). Assuming she loves, respects and admires him.
Yes. Luckily my friend, cousins, and I, don’t have to think about this stuff. We found well-adjusted spouses without personally disorders.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Manure Spherian

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Cheeky_James

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It’s tough.

there’s two sayings that are applicable in a relationship. For it to work and for a guy to keep his power. And leading position. (I think)

“Desire lives in mystery”
And also
“Familiarity breeds contempt”

two sides of the same coin I guess.
Gotta keep some Independance and freedom for yourself. No matter what.

I have a good friend who was a notorious player/ladies man (a natural) . He always kept 1 night of every weekend , (if not 2) as a Lads Night.

great idea.

Don’t discuss or open up too much about your insecurities . Anxieties or problems to a woman.
Talk to other people about those for sure.

my 2c.
 

SmoothHendrixPS2

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I'll never understand why women are on this forum. Don't ever listen to a women encouraging you to be vulnerable with her. EVER. Save it for mentors or your mother. Same women who say such things fantasize about getting r**ed. Hypergamy is in their nature. Women would watch their men get killed and village taken over and not even think twice bout leaving with the conquerors.
 
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