"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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What is a DJ to do on Valentine's Day?

BPH

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I'm in High School and it's on a Tuesday. I know this is the day that most people probably have sex as well as the day most people break up.

I'm single and I enjoy being single, but is this one of those holidays that are overly hyped or is it a day that makes it harder/easier to be a DJ?

Sorry if the question is vague, I don't know how to word this but I hope some of you can pick it up.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Iceberg

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What is a DJ to do?

Buy your favorite ice cream, put on your coziest slippers, and sit at home crying.

Valentine's Day is like any other day. It has no special meaning. The only people who fear valentine's day are whiny single women, AFCs, and couples who lack originality.

If you were of drinking age, I'd tell you to hit up the bars and clubs for desperate single women looking for validation. But you're not. So I'll just tell you not to care.
 

Leopold

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Valentines? What's so special about it?

If anything special will happen that day is that I'll work extra hard when hitting the gym.
 

Bible_Belt

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Valentine's and Christmas are a good time to not have a girlfriend, because then you don't have to buy them anything. My girlfriend is only getting a card, but it's still annoying. I hate cards, but she likes them, so oh well.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

shizz702

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Well what I'm gonna do is have a f<ck fest with one my plates and have her cook me a nice dinner.

Let's not forget steak and a bl0wjob day, that is gonna be a good day!
 

bigneil

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I like to give out the tiny envelope Valentine's like we gave out in school. It's a good excuse to go flirt with your favorite customer service crushes.
 

AJMS

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st_99 said:
dumbest 'holiday' on the planet.

No, in Canada we have a holiday called "Family day" that happens a week after valentines. No work, no school and its ironic no one really ever gets together as a family.

NOT COMPLAINING ABOUT IT THOUGH!
 
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