What does this behavior mean?

[Atom Smasher]

Ok, I've been doing well with the ladies as a result of being on this forum and presenting myself to the world with a little style. So far so good.

I'm wondering about an interaction I had today, and I must admit I can't really figure out what it means.

I've been flirting with this chick at church for a couple of months (I haven't been pursuing a relationship because of a 15 year age difference and she's glued to her aunt). She has been my "technique experiment". I've been doing the teasing thing to good effect, but I'm wondering if I went overboard.

Today at church she came up to the stage to say hello (I'm a guitarist), and I had a nice, short conversation. I told her in all seriousness that I would like to see her attend the home church group that I'm leading, and that she would be a real asset to the group. She seemed quite appreciative of my comment.

After church, a little more light teasing here & there (which she has always responded well to), and then, smiling, and very deliberately touching my arm, she says something like "Gee, Atom Smasher, I must say, I feel really good about myself whenever I'm around you". Then she mentioned a couple of teasings from the past. She definitely had a big smile on her face and was touching me. I said, "Your'e being facetious, right?", (because people actually really do feel good about themselves when they're around me). She said, still with a big smile, "Yes, I'm being facetious, very facetious".

So help this old boy out. I really don't know what to make of this. It seems her body language was out of sync with her verbal message. What do you guys think was really going on?

Again, this is just a practice run so no biggie either way. She always does seem quite happy to see me when I show up. If you don't mind, please let me know what you think happened if you have any insight.

Thanks!

 

[slaog]

Ok, I've been doing well with the ladies as a result of being on this forum and presenting myself to the world with a little style. So far so good.

I'm wondering about an interaction I had today, and I must admit I can't really figure out what it means.

I've been flirting with this chick at church for a couple of months (I haven't been pursuing a relationship because of a 15 year age difference and she's glued to her aunt). She has been my "technique experiment". I've been doing the teasing thing to good effect, but I'm wondering if I went overboard.

Today at church she came up to the stage to say hello (I'm a guitarist), and I had a nice, short conversation. I told her in all seriousness that I would like to see her attend the home church group that I'm leading, and that she would be a real asset to the group. She seemed quite appreciative of my comment.

After church, a little more light teasing here & there (which she has always responded well to), and then, smiling, and very deliberately touching my arm, she says something like "Gee, Atom Smasher, I must say, I feel really good about myself whenever I'm around you". Then she mentioned a couple of teasings from the past. She definitely had a big smile on her face and was touching me. I said, "Your'e being facetious, right?", (because people actually really do feel good about themselves when they're around me). She said, still with a big smile, "Yes, I'm being facetious, very facetious".

So help this old boy out. I really don't know what to make of this. It seems her body language was out of sync with her verbal message. What do you guys think was really going on?

Again, this is just a practice run so no biggie either way. She always does seem quite happy to see me when I show up. If you don't mind, please let me know what you think happened if you have any insight.

Thanks!

How was the body language out of sink with the verbal message? I mean it couldn't be any clearer! lol


Smiling, touching your arm, happy to see you, remembering teasings from the past and she even gives you the biggest hint ever saying she always feels good around you. Your techniques are working. If you want her you can have her.


If you don't like the girl ease up on the flirting because the more attached to you she gets the bigger the disappointment when you have to let her down.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Words mean NOTHING with women... her actions are telling you she's attracted/interested and enjoying your company.

She's interested and was flirting with you by adding sarcasm to her words. Strike while the iron's hot..... go get it!!

Don't over-analyze, she's interested.



PIMP

 

[Atom Smasher]

How was the body language out of sink with the verbal message? I mean it couldn't be any clearer! lol

Smiling, touching your arm, happy to see you, remembering teasings from the past and she even gives you the biggest hint ever saying she always feels good around you. Your techniques are working.

sloag,
Thanks for replying.

The reason I say she was out of sync is that she was saying she was being facetious, hence her verbal message was, "I don't feel good about myself around you".

Yet at the same time she is smiling and touching my arm. That is the source of my confusion.

It's amazing how I could have grown up with 3 sisters, no brothers, a largely absent father, and have so little knowledge of "********".

Is your answer the same now that you see that her verbal message was directly opposite her body language?
Thanks!

 

[Atom Smasher]

Words mean NOTHING with women... her actions are telling you she's attracted/interested and enjoying your company.

She's interested and was flirting with you by adding sarcasm to her words. Strike while the iron's hot..... go get it!!

Don't over-analyze, she's interested.

PIMP

Ok, thanks pimp-sicle. It has always been so baffling to me how women's actions can be completely incongruent with their words. I was wondering if I had gone overboard and turned her off with too much teasing.

I remember growing up with my three sisters, and while we were playing everything would be fine & dandy until all of a sudden, out of the blue, one of them would feel hurt or offended, start crying and running to mommy. Atom Smasher is punished, and the cycle continues...

That's probably why I'm kind of sensitive to a sudden change in mood, especially when mixed messages are involved.

 

[slaog]

Yes you judge women on their actions. Actions speak louder then words as they say. Rule no 1 in understanding women. Thats not to say they're always lieing but their actions are more accurate to how they feel even when they themselves are consciously not too sure.


Touching your arm is in almost all cases a good sign. That along with the smiling and being happy to see you means she definetly likes you and because you're not too bothered about the outcome it means she probably likes you more.

 

[Young Juan]

This one is easy - she has no clue what "facetious" means. She thought it meant something akin to "flirty."