"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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What do you guys think this girl is up to ???

Dongfu

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I met this girl on another island at a music show I was performing in - really beautiful, and down to earth - nearly girlfriend material :p

We connected immediately, and began making plans to see each other again, when I returned to the island. So, I fly in a few days ago, and she drives two hours from the other side of the island to meet me for dinner. She called me while my phone was off on the airplane and said, "you must still be getting off the plane, I made it over here, call me as soon as you get in."

I call her back and get her voice mail, and leave a message to call me. Hours keep passing and I never hear from her. I leave another message asking if she lost her cell phone, and I gave her my # in case she was checking messages from another phone. 2 days go by, never hear from her, and now she is back in san fran for the holidays.

So I call her yesterday and she finally answers and she says that she lost her phone in her rental car, and she didnt find it until she returned the car and left for San Fransisco. SHe acts real casual, as if she hadnt given it much thought, and says she wants to hook up when she returns.

The way I see it, if she was really interested in me, she would have made a better effort to find the phone or get a hold of me. I'm not sure if she's playing a game or not. She seems very straight forward. What do you guys think? And should I cal her on it and tell her I dont have time to spend on women who arent making a sincere effort to hang with me. Or should I keep acting real casual as I have been, saying "cool. call me when you get back."
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Gangster Of Love

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"I understand. How will you make it up to me?"
 

Dongfu

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Gangster Of Love said:
"I understand. How will you make it up to me?"
First post by GOL :up:

Now that the initial conversation about it is over, are you suggesting that I bring it up again and say that ^^

I already kind of played it off like it was no skin off my back. But I still feel a little annoyed about it.
 

Gangster Of Love

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Next time you talk to her, if she brings it up, tell her she's on probation. If she's interested, she will play along with you and ask you why, then you can tell her. Be playful, fun, yet she needs to know that you are serious and you will not tolerate that.

"How will you make it up to me?"

Says all the right things. Tells her you are on to her and her game. You will not tolerate flakiness, and at the same time you are willing to giver her another chance, but she has to "earn it".

Give her a little guilt trip if you need to. Don't go overboard and come across as AFC, yet don't let her get away with something most men let her get away with. Why? Just because she's attractive?
 

Dongfu

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Gangster Of Love said:
Next time you talk to her, if she brings it up, tell her she's on probation. If she's interested, she will play along with you and ask you why, then you can tell her. Be playful, fun, yet she needs to know that you are serious and you will not tolerate that.

"How will you make it up to me?"

Says all the right things. Tells her you are on to her and her game. You will not tolerate flakiness, and at the same time you are willing to giver her another chance, but she has to "earn it".

Give her a little guilt trip if you need to. Don't go overboard and come across as AFC, yet don't let her get away with something most men let her get away with. Why? Just because she's attractive?
For sure bro, this is exactly the attitude I usually have. I didn't think i'd have to play any games with this one, but if she wants play around, she doesn't know what she's getting into. I have a special knack for getting women off their pedestal in a lighthearted ****y way. Thanx
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Effington

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Gangster usually gives pretty solid advice, hard to go wrong there.

You may be looking a little too into her motives, but yes, I would be ticked if I made a trip to see someone who did not show up or answer her cell phone. Not a complete and total dealbreaker, but as mentioned above, is suspect.
 
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