What do I say?

[The LadyKiller]

For a couple of weeks, I have been eyeing a HB8 in my social circle. I've known her about a year, we've always gotten along, but I've never thought much of it until recently. I've noticed some IOI's recently, but am not completely sure of her interest - she's begun trying to sh*t test me. However, our separate work schedules create issues - different hours (late) and different off days for the next few weeks. There's virtually no span in this time where either of us are off at the same time. Though I am normally a fast-mover, I cannot ask her out if there isn't a time that works.

With all of this in mind, her birthday is coming up in a few days (my company is making me work late the entire week, so I'm unlikely able to attend any festivities). My plan was to get her something small with a card, hoping that's not AFC. The note will be short, but I am having trouble trying to suggest us going out/on a date within the note (since our days do not match up). That's where I need your help. Is there a smooth way to write this? I'll litter the note with a couple of inside jokes, but the main emphasis is where I need help.

 

[BeDJ]

You best bet is to use her to hit on other women. Her presence will give you a nice social value and make her value your attention. I think that would be the best scenario for you.

 

[jurry]

Put picture of your d*ck in the note.

 

[Piers Nivens]

Tell her you're the F K I N G LADY KILLER

 

[EbbsAndFlows]

You best bet is to use her to hit on other women. Her presence will give you a nice social value and make her value your attention. I think that would be the best scenario for you.

+1.

If you are going to try to spit game at her, I'd have to suggest not leaving a note. If you're not dating, notes are kinda creepy. Definitely don't buy her something if you're not dating. Look at the scenario through eyes, and don't put on a romanticized lens.

Shoot her a short, considerate text. I can't imagine anything more than that playing to your favor.

 

[VladPatton]

I agree with Ebbs. Buy nothing. Send a text that says Happy Bday and call it a day. Don't go that AFC route. The only way to move past this state of suspended animation is to ask her out. There is no other way for you to achieve your goal. So until that happens, remain cool and at minimum contact.