Plec07
Senior Don Juan
Keep it to the point, don't keep on trying to convince her. State your side and then be unaffected by her decision of who to listen to.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
What do i do when she says....
- Thread starter SIDEBOARD
- Start date
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
nicenomore
Senior Don Juan
plec rightly put about going overboard. Simply state it once , repeating cetain points for a mere emphasis at max. Dont be affected by the outcome.Plec07 said:
Better still , in School , you can tell it between the class if you meet , you can always state your point and walk away with the excuse of going back to class. But even if you meet her later , dont ask "whats your decision?" and stuff like that. Her actions of being with you or ignoring you are answers enough.
Over board is generally like going too far in explaning . Stating your points 10 times , begging for a response etc. That shows you are a pu$$y whipped.
Its a hard concept to explain in words, but pretty easy to understand practically.
I'm suprised that no one mentioned the obvious. If she really did show IOI's like you mentioned including coming alone with you, then this must have been a **** test. She's trying to see your reaction and to see if you'll go all AFC and be defensive etc.
nicenomore
Senior Don Juan
sorry kiko-
thats not a $h!t test. Read all the posts in the thread carefully, you'll understand why. $hit tests are more in the nature of refusing an act , such a giving of a phone number, more in the nature of push -pull.
Ok , not gettng personal here, but whats your suggestion for him to do? Ignore the girl or accept the rumors being spread?
thats not a $h!t test. Read all the posts in the thread carefully, you'll understand why. $hit tests are more in the nature of refusing an act , such a giving of a phone number, more in the nature of push -pull.
Ok , not gettng personal here, but whats your suggestion for him to do? Ignore the girl or accept the rumors being spread?
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
GaryUranga
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 7, 2006
- Messages
- 835
- Reaction score
- 7
IMO, distance yourself a bit for now, stop being pushy
First of all, my bad, I misread the original post.
Ill take this make and tell you from scratch what I would have done. You know sometimes when you heard a girl was interested in you, you started being interested or at least thinking about her? Well, considering how you had IOI's there you could have gotten even more by simply saying "Im gonna ask you out one of these days, just not now, Im not in the mood". This will basically get you on her mind and everything.
The fact that you bought her Ice Tea and held her bag was a sign of your former AFC self returning. - nice guys finish last, let her pay for the pizza.
After this, something took place which totally screws you over and what I hate about delaying and basically high school. That is, rumours spread. Now, if I was in your position, I'd keep my mouth shut except for the "Ill ask you out..." line and other things towards her as far as my 'feelings' and 'intentions' go. The rest comes out through body language and kino.
Now, before I continue, you mentioned meeting her etc. Basically, I'd move on. Tell her "I heard about these rumours and it's too bad this had to happen. Perhaps I'll see ya around/LJBF." That's my way b/c I don't even wanna imagine what happens next with those stupid rumours.
So, from here what I suggest is push n pull but without actually intending on pulling her. When you see her again, do "what i'd do" and kino her or whatever and make a joke about the situation about how 'it's over' per say. Then leave her and find another chick. Simple as that.
Ill take this make and tell you from scratch what I would have done. You know sometimes when you heard a girl was interested in you, you started being interested or at least thinking about her? Well, considering how you had IOI's there you could have gotten even more by simply saying "Im gonna ask you out one of these days, just not now, Im not in the mood". This will basically get you on her mind and everything.
The fact that you bought her Ice Tea and held her bag was a sign of your former AFC self returning. - nice guys finish last, let her pay for the pizza.
After this, something took place which totally screws you over and what I hate about delaying and basically high school. That is, rumours spread. Now, if I was in your position, I'd keep my mouth shut except for the "Ill ask you out..." line and other things towards her as far as my 'feelings' and 'intentions' go. The rest comes out through body language and kino.
Now, before I continue, you mentioned meeting her etc. Basically, I'd move on. Tell her "I heard about these rumours and it's too bad this had to happen. Perhaps I'll see ya around/LJBF." That's my way b/c I don't even wanna imagine what happens next with those stupid rumours.
So, from here what I suggest is push n pull but without actually intending on pulling her. When you see her again, do "what i'd do" and kino her or whatever and make a joke about the situation about how 'it's over' per say. Then leave her and find another chick. Simple as that.
Writing some long-ass response to her drama.SIDEBOARD said:
Did she notice you 'molesting' her at the time? Then it was nothing.
Tell her you thought she was cool and were happy you and had a good time so you told your friends, just as she no doubt does to her gfs. If that freaks her out, and she wants to make some big drama out of it, fine lets never speak again.
Though you will probably ignore this good advice, beg for forgiveness and lose her respect for good.
No actually I will follow your advices.
Now I tried to talk to her last Monday first I texted her to ask permission if we can talk in private, she didn't reply, she didn't pop up for our arts club either(which I thought that would be my chance to explain my side and go), so I can only think of one thing, She probably doesn't trust me and will not believe my side, so the solution is, either to ignore her as most of you said or to find another chick as more of you said.(I'm thinking of getting my Korean bus mate, but I can't find any possible topic openers and neg's for her, although I can kino her)
So Problem solved Thanks Guys!
Now I tried to talk to her last Monday first I texted her to ask permission if we can talk in private, she didn't reply, she didn't pop up for our arts club either(which I thought that would be my chance to explain my side and go), so I can only think of one thing, She probably doesn't trust me and will not believe my side, so the solution is, either to ignore her as most of you said or to find another chick as more of you said.(I'm thinking of getting my Korean bus mate, but I can't find any possible topic openers and neg's for her, although I can kino her)
So Problem solved Thanks Guys!