"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

What do I do?!! I feel like I'm gonna die!

usernamedox11

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Hey guys. I was dating a girl for 3 months and she dumped me. I was so nice to her. I took her to a very nice dinner on our first date. I bought her presents. I massaged and kissed her feet after a long hard day of her at work. I went down on her all the time despite her never giving me oral. I did everything the perfect BF should do!!!!! Yesterday she came over and told me she didn't wuv me anymore. I didn't know what to do. I went down on my knees and grabbed her legs. I told her PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME, WAHHHH WAHHHH. She then said I was very sweet and said sorry. She left!

What do I do?! How do I get her back?! I must convince her of her LOVE FOR ME!!!!!!!!


WAHHHH WAHHHHH WAHHHH


http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=210809
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

El Suave

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Are you insane? This chick doesn't fit the mold! You have to throw away everything you read in the bible with this one.

This girl is different, she's high quality. Here's what you do: Go sleep outside of her house in your car and when she wakes up, you want to be the first person she sees. Make sure you have a cup of coffee and flowers for her. If she sees you every morning for about 2 weeks, it will be like addiction for her.

Then, after 2 weeks, show up with a puppy. Tell her "this is our child, let's name him together". Her heart is going to melt and she will let you go down on her again.

If after that you sense she still is not invested 100%, go talk to her family and friends. Be loving and caring with them and explain to them how you simply cannot go on without her. Do not be afraid to let your emotions flow. If you feel like crying, do it. Women do it all the time, too. They understand and will see that you are sincere.

I know this works. I have seen the same advice on forums like Yahoo Answers. I know this forum is better and usually gives different advice, but this is a special case. She is worth it!

Good luck.
 

usernamedox11

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El Suave said:
Are you insane? This chick doesn't fit the mold! You have to throw away everything you read in the bible with this one.

This girl is different, she's high quality. Here's what you do: Go sleep outside of her house in your car and when she wakes up, you want to be the first person she sees. Make sure you have a cup of coffee and flowers for her. If she sees you every morning for about 2 weeks, it will be like addiction for her.

Then, after 2 weeks, show up with a puppy. Tell her "this is our child, let's name him together". Her heart is going to melt and she will let you go down on her again.

If after that you sense she still is not invested 100%, go talk to her family and friends. Be loving and caring with them and explain to them how you simply cannot go on without her. Do not be afraid to let your emotions flow. If you feel like crying, do it. Women do it all the time, too. They understand and will see that you are sincere.

I know this works. I have seen the same advice on forums like Yahoo Answers. I know this forum is better and usually gives different advice, but this is a special case. She is worth it!

Good luck.
I wrote her poem, too. LET ME KNOW IF IT'S GOOD!

To My One and Only Love

You are the only one I will ever love
That no one else will ever come above
The sun doesn't rise till I see your face
I must see you, please give me a taste
Because my heart is in an incredible race
To win you over and reach our final place
In order to create a forever lasting memory trace
 

El Suave

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applegoo said:
I wrote her poem, too. LET ME KNOW IF IT'S GOOD!

To My One and Only Love

You are the only one I will ever love
That no one else will ever come above
The sun doesn't rise till I see your face
I must see you, please give me a taste
Because my heart is in an incredible race
To win you over and reach our final place
In order to create a forever lasting memory trace


I like it a lot. You ARE on the right track with it. you can also add, if you want


You brighten my day
You're like my guard
Nothing could harm me
With you, nothing surrounds us, I feel so free
You're my protection
Saving my fall
Together, nothing will stop us
We'll conquor all.
 

LP700-4

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You idiot! That's not how you go about it. You're supposed to get a tattoo of her name on your forehead and a picture of her on your chest. That way any girl you meet, will know she's your one and only true love. It doesn't matter if she's sleeping with other men. When she's having her hair pulled and her a$$ spanked, she's really thinking of you, applegoo. You're always on her mind. Never forget that. So go out there and get that damn tattoo right now!!!
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

Albatross953

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This is gold, I'm gonna email this poem to 75 girls on POF. Field report coming up...
 

LP700-4

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Albatross953 said:
This is gold, I'm gonna email this poem to 75 girls on POF. Field report coming up...
What's weird is that some girls might actually fall for it. Some of the more stuck up ones will think you're serious and call you a creep but there are a handful of normal girls who know a joke when they see one.
 

El Suave

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LP700-4 said:
What's weird is that some girls might actually fall for it. Some of the more stuck up ones will think you're serious and call you a creep but there are a handful of normal girls who know a joke when they see one.

Of course it works. I read it on the internet!!!!!
 

usernamedox11

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Albatross953 said:
This is gold, I'm gonna email this poem to 75 girls on POF. Field report coming up...
lol, did you actually try that poem?
 

VladPatton

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Here's the DJ version of that killer poem:

You are the only one I will ever rail
I cüm so much I fill a pail
The sun doesn't rise till I blast your face
You must blow me!...hope you like the taste
Because in my balls there is an incredible race
To bang you hard at an incredible pace
In order to cüm all over your face
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

adam225

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:crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup:
 

Albatross953

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Yes, I actually did send out the poem to eleven women. I got blocked eleven times.
 

usernamedox11

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JaegerPilot217 said:
You can't be serious asking this? Was she the first girl you ever dated?
It's a joke. lol

Albatross953 said:
Yes, I actually did send out the poem to eleven women. I got blocked eleven times.
lmao. rep
 

trent_afc

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lol. The OP's post was pretty much where I was at 10 years ago. Sigh. :cry:
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

mikey2012

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applegoo said:
Hey guys. I was dating a girl for 3 months and she dumped me. I was so nice to her. I took her to a very nice dinner on our first date. I bought her presents. I massaged and kissed her feet after a long hard day of her at work. I went down on her all the time despite her never giving me oral. I did everything the perfect BF should do!!!!! Yesterday she came over and told me she didn't wuv me anymore. I didn't know what to do. I went down on my knees and grabbed her legs. I told her PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME, WAHHHH WAHHHH. She then said I was very sweet and said sorry. She left!

What do I do?! How do I get her back?! I must convince her of her LOVE FOR ME!!!!!!!!


WAHHHH WAHHHHH WAHHHH


http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=210809

DRUM ROLL....YOU ARE 2013 AFC of the YEAR
 

LeonSK

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U r too nice to her, man... Stay cool and focus on improving yourself! You'll meet someone better.
 

Atom Smasher

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Guys, I don't want to hijack this thread, but I've always warned to know...

Do looks matter?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

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