themanwithnoname
Senior Don Juan
www.nomarriage.com , despite his rantings, there is some obvious truths to that, makes you think about qualifying a woman.
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
What age should you get worried that you aren't married?
- Thread starter dannyc
- Start date
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
JackPrescott
Banned
- Joined
- Apr 19, 2005
- Messages
- 860
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Why get married? Just shack it up, thats where it's at, when you in love you need linen, not license.
al77
Master Don Juan
libre,Originally posted by libre
Do NOT get hitched before 27!
Since you accumulated more birthdays and experience: have you ever felt like "I have to et married.. soon"? Whe you were 30? 33?
35? 40? or on any other "prominent" day...
Before I hit 30, I didn't care or thnk much about marriage.
HereToImprove
Don Juan
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- Jun 15, 2005
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- 102
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I would say sometime in the early to mid 30s is pretty money. You can still get girls in their mid to late 20s at this age without it being weird, and it gives you time to get it out of your system.
This is one nice advantage of being a guy, we get more years to enjoy the single life.
This is one nice advantage of being a guy, we get more years to enjoy the single life.
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
DJ_in_making
Master Don Juan
I strongly disagree. Guys usually don't like girls unless they are physically attractive. Girls on the other hand aren't as attracted to physical looks. I would more often see an old guy w/ a young chick then an old lady with a young guy.Originally posted by PoS
women can get any guy anytime she wants .. but it is hard for the guys.
I just spent some time reading through www.nomarriage.com, and I have to say a lot of what I saw there sickened me. I'd like to address some of the complaints by men there.
Complaint #1: The sex stopped once we got married. Or it's boring. Or the wife witholds it to get what she wants.
This, my friend, is probably your own fault. As we at SoSuave are well aware, all women are "sluts." Under the right conditions, they like sex as much as, if not more, than guys.
However, a woman requires more from sex than guys. Women need the right atmosphere. They need foreplay. They need to be aroused. A guy can pretty much get by with anything.
If a woman is able to resist sex with you, it is because you are not meeting her needs. Men are the leaders. You should be trying new things to keep the sex from getting old and stale. Experiment. Have fun.
If anything, sex should get better after marriage, because a woman knows deep down that you are committed to her and this lets her release her innner "slut" without fear.
Complaint #2: I have to work hard so I can buy the things my wife insists I buy her.
Again, this is likely the man's fault. It begins with the AFC trap of buying women things while dating. They get used to it, and realize that they can get expensive things from you if they apply the right pressure (eg. withold sex). When you get married, the woman knows she has you by the balls, and can really go for the big stuff.
This one is fairly easy avoid. Simply don't buy many gifts for girls you are dating. If they don't like that and dump you, congratulations. You just avoided a life of misery.
Complaint #3: My wife is cheating on me.
You have allowed another man to have a higher perceived value than yourself. It's probably your fault.
Complaint #4: My wife left me.
Often follows #3. Again, you shouldn't take your wife for granted. Maintain your value by giving her something (not material) no one else can.
Complaint #5: Modern marriages suck. Just look at the divorce rates. We should go back to the old days.
The reason divorce rates are high is that women can afford to leave their husbands. In the past, women could not really get jobs, so they stayed with their husbands because they depended on them, not because they liked them.
Take my grandmother. She married my grandfather just after the war (~1946). They had 6 kids together. He worked, she stayed home. Sounds like a perfect marriage?
50 years later she divorced him. Why? Because she realized that she could afford to divorce the self-centred, immature, dominating man she married.
Now I don't know about you, but I view this as a good thing. A marriage where your wife doesn't like you but stays with you because she has to is not what I want. I want a wife who stays with me because she realizes that I am better than anyone else out there.
In conclusion, everyone here should realize that we, as Don Juans, have the skills to avoid the pitfalls that the men at nomarriage.com complain of. We know how to ensure that the women we are with choose and stay with us because we are the best, not because we can give them nice things. We can get women who please us, while at the same time we know how to please our women so that they realize our inner value. Quite simply, we know that we not only can be, but are, the catch that our women have always dreamed of.
Complaint #1: The sex stopped once we got married. Or it's boring. Or the wife witholds it to get what she wants.
This, my friend, is probably your own fault. As we at SoSuave are well aware, all women are "sluts." Under the right conditions, they like sex as much as, if not more, than guys.
However, a woman requires more from sex than guys. Women need the right atmosphere. They need foreplay. They need to be aroused. A guy can pretty much get by with anything.
If a woman is able to resist sex with you, it is because you are not meeting her needs. Men are the leaders. You should be trying new things to keep the sex from getting old and stale. Experiment. Have fun.
If anything, sex should get better after marriage, because a woman knows deep down that you are committed to her and this lets her release her innner "slut" without fear.
Complaint #2: I have to work hard so I can buy the things my wife insists I buy her.
Again, this is likely the man's fault. It begins with the AFC trap of buying women things while dating. They get used to it, and realize that they can get expensive things from you if they apply the right pressure (eg. withold sex). When you get married, the woman knows she has you by the balls, and can really go for the big stuff.
This one is fairly easy avoid. Simply don't buy many gifts for girls you are dating. If they don't like that and dump you, congratulations. You just avoided a life of misery.
Complaint #3: My wife is cheating on me.
You have allowed another man to have a higher perceived value than yourself. It's probably your fault.
Complaint #4: My wife left me.
Often follows #3. Again, you shouldn't take your wife for granted. Maintain your value by giving her something (not material) no one else can.
Complaint #5: Modern marriages suck. Just look at the divorce rates. We should go back to the old days.
The reason divorce rates are high is that women can afford to leave their husbands. In the past, women could not really get jobs, so they stayed with their husbands because they depended on them, not because they liked them.
Take my grandmother. She married my grandfather just after the war (~1946). They had 6 kids together. He worked, she stayed home. Sounds like a perfect marriage?
50 years later she divorced him. Why? Because she realized that she could afford to divorce the self-centred, immature, dominating man she married.
Now I don't know about you, but I view this as a good thing. A marriage where your wife doesn't like you but stays with you because she has to is not what I want. I want a wife who stays with me because she realizes that I am better than anyone else out there.
In conclusion, everyone here should realize that we, as Don Juans, have the skills to avoid the pitfalls that the men at nomarriage.com complain of. We know how to ensure that the women we are with choose and stay with us because we are the best, not because we can give them nice things. We can get women who please us, while at the same time we know how to please our women so that they realize our inner value. Quite simply, we know that we not only can be, but are, the catch that our women have always dreamed of.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
I'm surprised that so many guys are concerned about this...
Joe The Homophobe
Master Don Juan
Marriage is a good thing, but not when you marry an american/western european woman. Yes, there are a lot of unhappy married men and the divorce rate is sky high in america. The problem is that men are stupid and don't how how to chose the right wife.
When a man buys a car he knows exactly what he wants to be happy. Yet in America and Europe a man choses a wife yet he doesn't seem to take into consideration what is best for him and his future! men 'fall in love' and all that crap yet they don't take into consideration, and erase most requirements a good wife has (good cook/good cleaner/100% loyal to you, 0% feminist blood in her)
www.nomarriage.com SPEAKS THE TRUTH! date american/western european women all you want, but when it comes to marriage AVOID THEM LIKE THE PLAGUE!
When a man buys a car he knows exactly what he wants to be happy. Yet in America and Europe a man choses a wife yet he doesn't seem to take into consideration what is best for him and his future! men 'fall in love' and all that crap yet they don't take into consideration, and erase most requirements a good wife has (good cook/good cleaner/100% loyal to you, 0% feminist blood in her)
www.nomarriage.com SPEAKS THE TRUTH! date american/western european women all you want, but when it comes to marriage AVOID THEM LIKE THE PLAGUE!
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Bonhomme
Master Don Juan
It's a negative, but you shouldn't get worried
When a man hits his mid to late 30s and beyond, a lot of women will eliminate him altogether as a LTR prospect if he's not been married -- unless, of course, she's super-attracted to him and there's no good alternates in the game. Then, chances are, she'll toss all her criteria right out the window.
But, in ordinary circumstances, being an "older," unmarried man is poison. I can't quite understand the attraction to failure, unless the gal is hunting for another monthly check.
Whatever the case, a real man doesn't do things because "everyone else does."
Yes, it can be an issue to a lot of hung-up women; no, one should not worry about it.
I just evade the question when it comes up, and say I don't have any kids that I know of, and don't want to dwell on past relationships. Let them feel the pressure of losing me.
When a man hits his mid to late 30s and beyond, a lot of women will eliminate him altogether as a LTR prospect if he's not been married -- unless, of course, she's super-attracted to him and there's no good alternates in the game. Then, chances are, she'll toss all her criteria right out the window.
But, in ordinary circumstances, being an "older," unmarried man is poison. I can't quite understand the attraction to failure, unless the gal is hunting for another monthly check.
Whatever the case, a real man doesn't do things because "everyone else does."
Yes, it can be an issue to a lot of hung-up women; no, one should not worry about it.
I just evade the question when it comes up, and say I don't have any kids that I know of, and don't want to dwell on past relationships. Let them feel the pressure of losing me.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
Re: It's a negative, but you shouldn't get worried
That's sad...Originally posted by Bonhomme
When a man hits his mid to late 30s and beyond, a lot of women will eliminate him altogether as a LTR prospect if he's not been married -- unless, of course, she's super-attracted to him and there's no good alternates in the game. Then, chances are, she'll toss all her criteria right out the window. ...
Junior Sanz
Don Juan
my father and i are extremely close as he raised me all by himself and sacrificed his entire life so i could have the life that i had as a child....
one day while i was in college, (i was 19 yrs old) at the time, i found out through a phone call that my father was in the hospital for emergency heart surgery... my heart dropped to the floor and nothing else mattered in the world as i just wanted my father to stay alive....
while laying in his hospital bed hooked to several wires, he looked at me, with tears in his eyes and said, " i love you and i want to see you grow up and get MARRIED.... i dont want to leave yet...i dont know, this might be it...."
this was tough to hear at age 19 and is actually bringing tears to my eyes as i recall that very traumatic day...to make a long story short everything went well and he is still here healthier than ever....
with that said, i always had MARRIAGE on my mind since my father said what he said while on his hospital bed.....
so i always got antsy while in short term relationships because in my eyes, I JUST WANTED TO GET MARRIED SO MY DAD COULD SEE ME.....
WOW!! what a crazy thing to think but at the time, thats all that mattered
NOW, i realized that this IS NOT reality and RELATIONSHIPS need to be worked AT! things just dont come that easy and marriage is way more serious then just doing it for someone else's sake.....
NOW that i know this, i took that extreme load of pressure off my back of wanting my dad to see me get married, and i am living more of a STRESS FREE life when it comes to this issue.....
MARRIAGE is a very sacred thing to me and now that i am older and more wiser... i still have a lot to learn but it feels good to reassure myself that when i CHOOSE to get married, i know i will have CHOSEN the right one because ONLY I have the power to make that decision and i am DOING IT FOR ME! NOT ANYONE ELSE!!!
just a sharing thought.........
one day while i was in college, (i was 19 yrs old) at the time, i found out through a phone call that my father was in the hospital for emergency heart surgery... my heart dropped to the floor and nothing else mattered in the world as i just wanted my father to stay alive....
while laying in his hospital bed hooked to several wires, he looked at me, with tears in his eyes and said, " i love you and i want to see you grow up and get MARRIED.... i dont want to leave yet...i dont know, this might be it...."
this was tough to hear at age 19 and is actually bringing tears to my eyes as i recall that very traumatic day...to make a long story short everything went well and he is still here healthier than ever....
with that said, i always had MARRIAGE on my mind since my father said what he said while on his hospital bed.....
so i always got antsy while in short term relationships because in my eyes, I JUST WANTED TO GET MARRIED SO MY DAD COULD SEE ME.....
WOW!! what a crazy thing to think but at the time, thats all that mattered
NOW, i realized that this IS NOT reality and RELATIONSHIPS need to be worked AT! things just dont come that easy and marriage is way more serious then just doing it for someone else's sake.....
NOW that i know this, i took that extreme load of pressure off my back of wanting my dad to see me get married, and i am living more of a STRESS FREE life when it comes to this issue.....
MARRIAGE is a very sacred thing to me and now that i am older and more wiser... i still have a lot to learn but it feels good to reassure myself that when i CHOOSE to get married, i know i will have CHOSEN the right one because ONLY I have the power to make that decision and i am DOING IT FOR ME! NOT ANYONE ELSE!!!
just a sharing thought.........