what advice would you give to...

[Eternal_water]

a 23 year old virgin with a social circle of 1 friend?

 

[JohnnyStorm]

Focus on yourself and your passions.
Is your life where you want it to be? I would imagine not.

Start by finding out who you are and what you like. Set goals for yourself and work on buiding yourself up. When you follow what you are passionate about, other things like women will fall into place, as they'll be drawn in by your energy.

It doesn't really matter where you've come from, it's where you're going that counts.

 

[Mr Wright]

Forget getting laid for a while and work on being social. Get outside everyday and start talking to people more in your daily life. When you're in a shop or restaurant ask for recommendations etc.

Also take up a new hobby which involves you interacting with people, whether it's taking a cooking class or joining a hiking group. Most people have friends with which they share a common interest whether it's sport, girls, the gym, computer games or whatever. Find people who share your interests, talk to them, share that experience together...that's how friendships are formed.

 

[Ruleit]

You've got 713 posts to your name... that tells me one thing and one thing alone:

STOP READING AND START DOING

Face your fears.

Sounds to me like you're afraid of rejection? Approach and get rejected until you don't give a darn.

 

[JoeMarron]

Like what I said to you in another thread, at least utilize the internet if you don't have the balls to game chicks in real life. I agree with Mr Wright that becoming more social is your number one priority right now. Talk to everyone. Start with a simple greeting and work your way up to small talk. Don't be afraid to take baby steps. A simple nod as a greeting is better than nothing. Get out of your head and share yourself with others. That means when something pops into your head say it. Social hobbies are good too, get the fvck out of the house. Ironically much of this stuff I need to be doing myself. Know that the correct knowledge is only the first step, putting that knowledge into action is when you'll find success.

 

[BeDJ]

I'm pretty sure you know what to do, but aren't putting in the effort or making excuses.

Anyways, at least you aren't these guys:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nzMeVpZBRw0

 

[JaegerPilot217]

if you have been on this site for this long sounds like you are not taking enough action or not at all

 

[TARKUS]

You don't need a social circle to get laid.

hit up chicks when you go out, use online dating, join a club, a group, school, so many ways and places to meet girls. sounds like you are afraid of putting yourself out there trying to use a social circle.

 

[Dgwizdal]

Forget about laying girls and work on making friends and building an empire. You need to work on your value and innergame first. This post as well as your post count tells me you are far behind on building a foundation and you probably haven't listened to sh!t thus far.

 

[compleks]

Leave your comfort zone.!

 

[Trump]

a 23 year old virgin with a social circle of 1 friend?

Bro I'm going to go out on a limb here and say get laid somehow, any which way, fast.

To join clubs, improve yourself, study, workout, and forget about girls is all nice and good but you will still get hot and bothered if you don't get the result, when you see others with their girlfriends you will get agitated and annoyed. You can know salsa dance, be ripped, learn guitar, make a lot of money and 3 years later you will still be in same position that you are now. You have to pay someone, go on vacation and get some, just do something to get this black cloud over your head.

The girls will not come flock to you because you have improved yourself. They could care less. They only care how you make them feel at that moment. If you don't know how to properly turn on their emotions at that moment, you won't get anywhere.

 

[Mike32ct]

^This. I'm with Trump 100%.

Forgetting about girls and doing other stuff generally won't get you laid. If you want to get laid, you have to focus on finding a way to get laid.

I'm all for learning dance or other languages or musical instruments or any other constructive hobby. But that stuff is for YOU not women.

OP: Do you still work at that nightclub?

 

[Mr Wright]

Bro I'm going to go out on a limb here and say get laid somehow, any which way, fast.

To join clubs, improve yourself, study, workout, and forget about girls is all nice and good but you will still get hot and bothered if you don't get the result, when you see others with their girlfriends you will get agitated and annoyed. You can know salsa dance, be ripped, learn guitar, make a lot of money and 3 years later you will still be in same position that you are now. You have to pay someone, go on vacation and get some, just do something to get this black cloud over your head.

The girls will not come flock to you because you have improved yourself. They could care less. They only care how you make them feel at that moment. If you don't know how to properly turn on their emotions at that moment, you won't get anywhere.

^This. I'm with Trump 100%.

Forgetting about girls and doing other stuff generally won't get you laid. If you want to get laid, you have to focus on finding a way to get laid.

I'm all for learning dance or other languages or musical instruments or any other constructive hobby. But that stuff is for YOU not women.

OP: Do you still work at that nightclub?

I'll say why I think you two are off the mark on this one. The OP made explicit reference to having 1 friend. That implies there is a much deeper problem than just not being able to get laid. It alludes to a lack of social skills, which even by getting laid won't really solve anything. He gets laid once, then is back to square 1 again only this time he's tasted what he wants but can't get it regularly, which will be just as frustrating. This is what I think the whole community is lacking in, they sort of want to stick a "completed" sticker on everything, the guys got laid once, big woop but he still only has one friend and has no idea how to do it again. Besides telling a guy who has never had sex to just go on holiday and bang some chick sounds easy but judging by his history it probably won't happen...and who is he going to even go with?

If he has patience, he's waited 23 years, what's another 9 months? Go out, work hard, get a social life which would be considered normal, more opportunities will present themselves. Banging a hooker isn't going to solve anything, you don't lose your virginity to a hooker and magically know how to get laid and everything falls into place. "Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day..."

 

[Eternal_water]

I play in 3 different sports clubs atm and I work out each week. So even though I'm not Brad Pitt. The looks situation isn't bad. Apart from lingering acne I think I look pretty good.

Yes my main problems are approach anxiety, fear of rejection and lack of social skills.

Mike32ct, yes I still work at the club and I get some fortunate accidents there that I don't often know how they happened apart from drunk girls being drunk. Last week a girl wanted her friend to take a photo of her kissing me (I didn't object as you can imagine). It didn't stop after the photo, it was a full on make out with tongues that lasted a good 45 seconds or so. Then her friend wanted to join in, so then I did the same thing with her. Then kissed the first girl again. (Then their friends dragged them away before I could try and get a number, not that I would have known quite what to say). So yeah, enjoying that job!

But yes, fear or rejection, AA and lack of social skills are my main problems.

 

[Mike32ct]

I see your point Mr. W. I certainly don't recommend hookers to any guy. I almost went that route but decided not to because it would have made me feel even worse about myself. While holiday lays are generally a great way to score, I agree that it would be quite difficult for a newbie to pull off.

I'm also not in any way trying to discourage the OP from being more social and improving himself. That's all good stuff that can only help him.

The point that I want to make (and I think Trump too) is not to expect puss to fall on his lap just because he completed this improvement project. You still need to try to get numbers, dates, makeouts, etc.

So improvement is great, but some focus needs to be on getting some experience with women also. He needs to do both.

The only warning I will give the OP is not to become obsessed with puss after the first lay and become a full time sarger. It's highly addictive and can take over your life. So yeah get laid, but keep the poon hunting in moderation.

 

[JaegerPilot217]

^This. I'm with Trump 100%.

Forgetting about girls and doing other stuff generally won't get you laid. If you want to get laid, you have to focus on finding a way to get laid.

I'm all for learning dance or other languages or musical instruments or any other constructive hobby. But that stuff is for YOU not women.

OP: Do you still work at that nightclub?

Ya I never understood why people say to us guys to forget about getting a girlfriend or getting laid, because if we want that we have to be the ones to make it happen, girls are usually the passive sex

 

[Eternal_water]

By the way, would girls act like this with a guy if they weren't even just a tiny bit attracted to him? Or if they were drunk enough would they do this with someone they weren't remotely attracted to?

Mike32ct, yes I still work at the club and I get some fortunate accidents there that I don't often know how they happened apart from drunk girls being drunk. Last week a girl wanted her friend to take a photo of her kissing me (I didn't object as you can imagine). It didn't stop after the photo, it was a full on make out with tongues that lasted a good 45 seconds or so. Then her friend wanted to join in, so then I did the same thing with her. Then kissed the first girl again. (Then their friends dragged them away before I could try and get a number, not that I would have known quite what to say). So yeah, enjoying that job!

 

[Mike32ct]

By the way, would girls act like this with a guy if they weren't even just a tiny bit attracted to him? Or if they were drunk enough would they do this with someone they weren't remotely attracted to?

There MUST be attraction for a makeout. Even the most drunk chick would have to be attracted to do that. You obviously have the look, OP. I wouldn't worry about that.

 

[JaegerPilot217]

how big is your social circle OP?

 

[3agle 3yes]

Trump, Mike32ct and JaegerPilot217.

Why is it that so many guys place so much importance on getting laid?

Does getting some p*ssy actually change your outlook of life?

What's so bad about being a virgin? ...getting laid for the first time is easy, assuming you're willing to drastically lower your standards.

The REAL reason why guys want to be good with women and get laid a lot is so they can feel good about themselves.

So actually OP's REAL problem is that he feels worthless...not that he is a virgin.

Women aren't important...most are too stupid or too average as people to place any importance with.

The more life experiences and well-rounded a man becomes, the more he sees women for what they really are.