"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Weight-lifting problem

Fender

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Hey guys, I've got a bit of a problem.

I've been doing squats for about 2 months now. I've been increasing the weight steadily over the past months, but recently, I couldn't increase it. It wasn't because my legs weren't up to it, it's because my back hurts like a b*tch! The Bar is crushing my back. I can't push my legs to "death" like i used to. I already put a layered towel on the bar, but it still hurts. Advice? I was thinknig of switching to leg presses.

-fender-
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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King of You

Don Juan
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quit being such a *****. Build up your back muscles and it wont hurt. get rid of that towel it will **** up your form.
 

Create Reality

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Do a few shrugs before you hit the bar. Get those muscles accustomed to moving and being moved.

The weight of the barbell is signifigantly concentrated into one line on your back. Using a pad or towel will help to distribute the weight over a wider surface and the focused energy of the barbell will not pwn your back. Its the same thing as stilletto heels; those things can crack a hardwood floor. You must distribute the weight over as much area as possible.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Warboss Alex

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You've been cheating on your squats so far then, by using your back to support the barbell instead of your whole body - your back wasn't straight. It's not an insult, so many people cheat on squats (out of the pitiful few who actually do them, which makes it even sadder), sometimes subconsciously to make it hurt them less or whatever.

If you'd been doing them properly your lower back would be perfectly capable of comfortably taking the weight, as it would have progressed as your squat weights did.

If your legs couldn't take it then I'd say take Mind's advice and do front squats or hack squats for a bit (until you get stuck on THEM, then change back to free squats) - but if it's your back then halve your squat weight, and concentrate on the form. I'll bet that once your form's better, your back won't hurt and your weight will go up even quicker.

EDIT: just reread the posts again, if you mean that the bar digs into your back and it hurts and THAT'S what you're complaining about then you're obviously not ready for squats, just stick to leg pressing or lunges with pink dumbbells.
 

Fender

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Thanks Create Reality, I think a few shrugs or pullups will warm up my upper back for the crushing that'll come ahead.

Warboss, I was talking about the pain where the bar rests on the upper back. My lower back is fine thank you:D

King of You, I don't see how a towel will mess up my form. Care to explain?

I guess the best I can do for now is to keep my squating weight the same, and do a few weeks of upper back exercise. Hopefully, after the few weeks, I my upper back can take more pain from the bar.

-fender-
 

Jay-X

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i usually squat with no more than 100lbs + bar, because i got very light bones and my back was starting to hurt too much... i remember once doing 165lbs and then not being able to bend my back for the rest of the day (and my legs were alright)

plus, i noticed that when i do 3 sets of 12 reps with 110lbs, my legs are far more sore than when i do 3 sets of 12 reps with 150 lbs... surely it's all about form
 

Warboss Alex

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Originally posted by Fender
Warboss, I was talking about the pain where the bar rests on the upper back. My lower back is fine thank you:D
-fender-
Then there's always the leg press. :rolleyes:
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Live-n-learn

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Do you do Deadlifts?

Maybe that can help you strengthen your lower back a bit.
 
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