"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Weekends

Josh_rugged

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Its been over 10 months with this girl, and she goes out every weekend with her friends, and barely gets to see me. What do I have to do, to make her want to spend a lot of time with me??? Its been bothering me for a while and i've drawn a blank. Please write me back at

[email protected]

Thank you very much,

Josh
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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JT47319

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Go out on the weekend, have fun, and hook up with other girls.
 

Josh_rugged

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Yes, I realize that your getting to the whole " go and party, and have fun " speech, but we are very serious about each other. I wouldn't want to spend my time with anyone else besides her.
 

buckwheat18

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Listen to yourself man! (slap, slap) why would you want to spend time with someone who doesn't want to spend time with you? Give it some time and go out and have fun with your bros. If she comes around thats cool, if she doesn't, her loss. Sounds like she and you just need space.
 

cactus3178

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Can you elaborate on this a bit?



-Do you guys live together/see each other during the week?

-How's everything going in general? Do you fight often?

-Does she ever invite you to go on these 'outings' with friends?

-Do you know where she goes?

-Did you guys used to hang out alot more or go out together on the weekends?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Josh_rugged

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Ummm...

Well, we first started dating, and we saw each other all the time. She has never invited me to go out with her and her friends. she claims I wouldn't like them. No we dont live together, and we dont fight often. We are very compatible with each other. And I always know where she goes. Maybe I am over-reacting. This dating game stuff can confuse the crap outa me. Thats why im on here asking for advice to help me feel better.
 

uniassign

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She has never invited me to go out with her and her friends.

Have you considered that you could be the second man in her life?

What do I have to do, to make her want to spend a lot of time with me???

Hint to her that another chick is interested. Better yet, let her see you with chicks that are interested in you.
 

cactus3178

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She has never invited me to go out with her and her friends. she claims I wouldn't like them.


Forgive me, bro, but this needs to be said:

You've been with this girl for 10 months, you guys don't hang out on the weekends. Hell, you've never been invited to hang out with your GIRLFRIEND'S friends!!

You guys hardly fight, and your 'very serious about each other', but every weekend, she's out with her friends (the ones that you wouldn't like :rolleyes: ) instead of hanging out with her BOYFRIEND!

I'm not meaning to sound like a ****, and I really don't know the situation like you do.....but personally, I'd drop her in favor of a girl who has some actuall interest in me. The fact that you don't know her friends or get invited to chill with them is absolutely inexcuseable. Bottom line. This is not a healthy relationship.

Girls with real interest want to spend time with you. If you think about this, you'll know that it is the truth.

I'd go find another girl if I were in that situation. There's only 100 million to choose from.


EDIT: I guess you probably want an answer to your actuall question ;)

If you want her to take more interest in you, back off alot. Don't call. Wait for her. Don't make plans with her. Let her initiate that. Next time she wants to go do something, you can't because your busy with something else. Something fun.

You'll know if she's a keeper pretty quick. Either she'll express interest, or she won't.

Good luck with this.
 

JT47319

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Originally posted by cactus3178
but personally, I'd drop her in favor of a girl who has some actuall interest in me.
No, he just needs to go out and get a second, short-term girlfriend.
 
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