"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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we were drunk for our first kiss...

wcknightjr

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k so this girls bday was last wednesday...and stuff had kinda built up for a while and she had been giving me subtle signs she liked me a little when ever I'd see her, as in we would go get food periodically (oh we both live across cvampus from each other btw). so, she invites me over to "study" ...on her bday...and sure enough her and her roommate were reading in their living room :rolleyes: . So i'm like whatever this can't last too long, so at about 11pm, her friends from hs show up from out of town and all the sudden itt turns into a bday party for her...so of course i stick around (can you tell i like her too :p ).

so then the whiskey shots start...when all was said and done, I had six with no chasers and she had 5. At this point the entire party of about ten people had moved to her room, and as time went on we started having more and more contact until she finally just leaned over while i was standing at her computer looking at what music to play and kissed me on the cheek...so after that we didn't break contact. People started heading home at like 1:30, and after they left, somehow the two of us ended up back in her room, alone.

for a while we just stood in the middle of her room (think slowdance postion) talking face to face. we were both a little messed up, tho not piss drunk, so we could still have a kinda strange convo about nothing...but then we ran out of stupid stuff to say so inevitably we started making out while leaning against her bed (its a good 4 feet up). She said some strange stuff, like "you're gonna be all about it tomorrow..." (we both had class at 9 so she wasn't down). when asked what "it" was, she said "hard banging" wtf?!

well basically, we had to cut it short before we really did anything stupid with class hours away, but now i think the problem is that from talking to her it seems like shes a little embarassed about the fact we were drunk, even tho it was clearly her intention on some level cuz she kept encouraging me to drink.

Monday we finally met up again just for a late dinner, but nothing physical happened at all, and we hardly touched on the matter at hand at all

so the question...finally: How do I clear the air and get things back on track so that she's not worried about what happened?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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assasin

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How do I clear the air and get things back on track so that she's not worried about what happened?
What? Do you mean "how do I get back into the friends zone?".

Shouldn't be hard, just keep doing what you've been doing.

I thought you said you liked her though? Or did you not mean in that way?
 

squirrels

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Not by having awkward, quiet dinners.

The so-called "anti-slut defense" came down when she was intoxicated. Now that she's sober, she doesn't want you to look at her as a slut for getting all freaky.

So if you're all :nervous: the next time you see her, she's gonna feel like, "OMG I slutted up, this is awkward."

You should just be like :up: :rock: :) and still show you don't think of her as a slut...give her a little reassurance.

And keep on closin'. ;)
 

Gangster Of Love

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Originally posted by squirrels
Not by having awkward, quiet dinners.

The so-called "anti-slut defense" came down when she was intoxicated. Now that she's sober, she doesn't want you to look at her as a slut for getting all freaky.

So if you're all :nervous: the next time you see her, she's gonna feel like, "OMG I slutted up, this is awkward."


Exactly! Women do that. The like to use the "One thing led to another" defense to rationalize letting their defense down. This is also what happens when you try to make out with them in a club the same nite you meet them. Now she will most likely avoid you and if she is forced to explain, she'll put you in the friends zone.
 

wcknightjr

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I'm thinkin right now the best plan is to just make a move next time we're alone to show her that everything's cool.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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