Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Was this chick BPD??

bunjy

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As some of you may know I recently had an experience with a chick who was a bit of a nightmare. Dated for a couple of months and recently walked away. Needless to say I feel much better now having gotten rid of her. I was talking to a friend of mine about the situation I ended up in and he mentioned it sounded like she had a borderline personality disorder. Id never heard of this before so did some googling out of curiosity. I searched the forums here and it seems quite a few of you have experience of dating chicks with BPD. When I first started dating her I just assumed she was an AW but I did feel as if something wasnt quite right but I couldnt figure out what. Anyway heres some things which make me think she may well have been BPD:

She was obsessed with getting as much male attention as possible.
She came on very very strong, declaring her love for me within a couple of weeks when we barely new each other.
Was very calculated and manipulative with complete disregard for other people.
She blew hot/cold and push/pull continuously. Some days everything was great other days it was terrible.
She told lies (mainly ones to make her life seems more interesting than it actually was)
She drank heavily on a very regular basis (3/4 times a week heavy drinking sessions often lasting all night).
She was unable to accept any sort of responsibility for her actions, even when it was glaringly obvious she had done wrong.
She had been in psychically abusive relationships.
A fair few of her exes where 'bad guys' who still stalked her apparently.
She had very few genuine female friends and her closest friends where male exes
She would become angry very easily if we had even a minor disagreement and would make up things I had said/done.
She was very unorganised and generally didnt have her life together, couldnt hold a steady job, started a night school course and quickly dropped out. Generally couldnt organise anything.
She'd add men on social media within 30 seconds of meeting them and would constantly seek attention on social media.
She just generally seemed to have this delusional attitude and live in a kind of self constructed dream world that was far from the reality she was in.

So guys what you think? Was this chick BPD? I feel as if I had a lucky escape but would be good to know the signs for next time so I can run for the hills!!
 
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"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Glumix

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Ask a psychiatrist.

BPD is a name for the signs. What's important is not the name.
 

bunjy

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The latest - three per week average - 'is/was this chick BPD' post.

Who cares?

Any woman behaving anything like the wacko you describe should be avoided.
Well yes. She was indeed a wacko.
 

Sprayarc

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Whatever she was she sounds toxic. Be glad she's out of your life.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Powersurgeon

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Sounds like my exwife. Too bad we had children and I have to see her on a daily basis. The most striking trait for me is the lies, She lies about everything.
 

bunjy

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Sounds like my exwife. Too bad we had children and I have to see her on a daily basis. The most striking trait for me is the lies, She lies about everything.
Oh dear, sounds hard. Yeah this chick told some ridiculous lies that where so unbelievable it would seem silly to tell them as getting caught was a given.

When she got cauht red handed she'd just brush it off and stay silent. Was very strange behaviour.
 

Julian

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crazy *****
 

Sprayarc

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Oh dear, sounds hard. Yeah this chick told some ridiculous lies that where so unbelievable it would seem silly to tell them as getting caught was a given.

When she got cauht red handed she'd just brush it off and stay silent. Was very strange behaviour.
I don't think this is to uncommon with women now a days. The last women I dated did the same thing.

Don't ever expect the truth. Don't try to get it out of her. If you know she lies to you and you don't like it drop her or just use her to fulfill her needs.

If it really bothers you then drop her, go no contact and block her.

Minimal analysis is ok to perceive the situation for what it is and be able to identify women like this in the future so you don't become attached before you figure out she is nuts.

But especially after the fact try to minimize worrying about it. The longer you don't have contact with her the more you'll get over it.
 
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