"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Was she just being considerate of my feelings or is she still interested?

Kaz91

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I ran into this girl I used date off and on. Things broke off due to the side effects of meds I was taking. Found out that was the problem and got off the pills. I was depressed and eventually out of shape. After months of not seeing to each other face to face and nothing but texts and short phone convos, I ran into her and explained what was going on. She said don't worry about it the past is the past. But here comes the problem I had heard she had new new boyfriend. She had been trying to steer around the topic and I basically had to force her to say it. I asked her for her number and she was reluctant at first but still gave it to me. I joked about how nervous she seemed and asked if there was anything she needed to say while I was there. Her voice very audibly shaky and nervous and she just couldn't find the words at first. After she said she was taken I just nodded quietly. Then said it had only been a couple since they started dating and they don't see each other much due to conflicting schedules. After that She was basically trying to run away before I could say anything.

Stupidly I admitted I still had feelings for her and she said it was too late because she was taken. Before she left she said if I needed anything to call her she only lives a few blocks away. So what do you guys think was she just being nice or was there still some interest there?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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roman81

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Sounds like you should find new girls to date, this one is done with you.
I would try not to contact her, she is not the only girl around. Concentrate on yourself and let this one go.
 

Kaz91

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I definitely will find new girls to date regardless. I just wanted to get other peoples thoughts on the situation. I've just been concentrating on getting back to form but, for some reason this has just been on my mind.
 

SgtSplacker

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She's just trying to not add to your depression, it's over dude...
 

Kaz91

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Nothing is wrong with me now been off the meds for a few months and, feeling perfect. But either way you guys are right. I have a couple potential prospects, just sucks being back at square one because things were out of my control.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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SgtSplacker

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Square one is a good thing when you have already left a bad impression of yourself with someone. Telling someone you are on meds is the same thing as telling them you're crazy. Information to be withheld until after the bang for sure...
 

Kaz91

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Yeah I know that wasn't the best idea but, she knew me years before and she was wondering why I was acting different. But it's cool not gonna get all butthurt over it. Too young to be tied down anyway and the way I figure it her relationship won't last, so I probably got the better end of things.
 
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