Wanna work on approaching/day game

[dk1990S111]

Seeing fastzanders thread got me thinking I wanna try it out. Lately my buddy has been kinda more forward with girls just mostly saying whatever not caring at all. I’m not in LA anymore. Live in a smallish town with not a whole lot of great options for younger women. Thinking I’ll go to the big city about an hour away to get some practice in a few times before trying it around home.

Honestly never had the confidence to do it, despite having the hottest girl in the bar (random guy at the bar’s words) coming on to me one night about 10 years ago and not really struggling with women. My ex broke me down pretty bad but I’m at a point where I am actually feeling pretty confident about myself now.

To help I’ll answer BeExcellents questions here:
1. How old are you? 34
2. What country are you in? US, Town in the southwest. 50k population in the town I’m in but about 75-80k in the whole area close enough to consider dating
3. What is your height/weight? 6’3” 190 lbs approx, slender build. Going to make one room in my house a gym room soon here.
4. What is your ethnicity? White
5. What is you target ethnicity in a woman? White, more traditional woman that isn’t all tatted up and pierced all over preferably
6. What is your income level/source of income? About 200-250k a year, business owner/operator so I don’t have a lot of time.

I do have a 2.5 year old daughter so that plays a part in dating for sure. Up until recently I was open to dating a single mom (my baby’s mom had 2 other kids that weren’t mine, and recent gf has a kid a little younger than my daughter) but at this point seeing Rich Cooper talk about having all the responsibility and zero say in how things go in your own home as far as the kid that isn’t yours I’m good on all that rather be single.

Any advice on getting going? I remember reading a lot on outcome independence here before. Mostly need advice on openers that don’t sound canned for sure. Good ways to start a convo

 

[SW15]

1. How old are you? 34
2. What country are you in? US, Town in the southwest. 50k population in the town I’m in but about 75-80k in the whole area close enough to consider dating
3. What is your height/weight? 6’3” 190 lbs approx, slender build. Going to make one room in my house a gym room soon here.
4. What is your ethnicity? White
5. What is you target ethnicity in a woman? White, more traditional woman that isn’t all tatted up and pierced all over preferably
6. What is your income level/source of income? About 200-250k a year, business owner/operator so I don’t have a lot of time.

Your biggest issue is your geography. It stinks. 75-80k population in your area is too small. Your geography was better in Los Angeles. Since you are in the US Southwest, have you considered Phoenix? This forum has a Phoenix thread.

Observations on Phoenix's Scene

Phoenix, Arizona has become one of the biggest metropolitan areas in the United States. It has grown a lot in recent decades. The 2020 Census estimated that Maricopa County (covering most of Metro Phoenix) has a 4.4 million population. In 1990, Maricopa County only had 2.1 million people. Almost...

www.sosuave.net

You are doing well on height/weight and income level.

I do have a 2.5 year old daughter so that plays a part in dating for sure. Up until recently I was open to dating a single mom (my baby’s mom had 2 other kids that weren’t mine, and recent gf has a kid a little younger than my daughter) but at this point seeing Rich Cooper talk about having all the responsibility and zero say in how things go in your own home as far as the kid that isn’t yours I’m good on all that rather be single.

This is going to be an issue for you in a smaller city and would even be one in a larger city.

In a smaller city, there might be more single moms than childless women in your age range (25-34).

Many childless women might not want to get involved long term with a single dad. In a bigger city where they have more options, they can avoid getting exclusive with one.

Mostly need advice on openers that don’t sound canned for sure. Good ways to start a convo

Do you think openers are your biggest issue? Everything else I've talked about is further down the line.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Seeing fastzanders thread got me thinking I wanna try it out. Lately my buddy has been kinda more forward with girls just mostly saying whatever not caring at all. I’m not in LA anymore. Live in a smallish town with not a whole lot of great options for younger women. Thinking I’ll go to the big city about an hour away to get some practice in a few times before trying it around home.

Honestly never had the confidence to do it, despite having the hottest girl in the bar (random guy at the bar’s words) coming on to me one night about 10 years ago and not really struggling with women. My ex broke me down pretty bad but I’m at a point where I am actually feeling pretty confident about myself now.

To help I’ll answer BeExcellents questions here:
1. How old are you? 34
2. What country are you in? US, Town in the southwest. 50k population in the town I’m in but about 75-80k in the whole area close enough to consider dating
3. What is your height/weight? 6’3” 190 lbs approx, slender build. Going to make one room in my house a gym room soon here.
4. What is your ethnicity? White
5. What is you target ethnicity in a woman? White, more traditional woman that isn’t all tatted up and pierced all over preferably
6. What is your income level/source of income? About 200-250k a year, business owner/operator so I don’t have a lot of time.

I do have a 2.5 year old daughter so that plays a part in dating for sure. Up until recently I was open to dating a single mom (my baby’s mom had 2 other kids that weren’t mine, and recent gf has a kid a little younger than my daughter) but at this point seeing Rich Cooper talk about having all the responsibility and zero say in how things go in your own home as far as the kid that isn’t yours I’m good on all that rather be single.

Any advice on getting going? I remember reading a lot on outcome independence here before. Mostly need advice on openers that don’t sound canned for sure. Good ways to start a convo

Seems like you are very impressionable with what other people say instead of what you actually have experienced.

That's a problem.

Everyone has their own personal biases that may not reflect the way you view things nor your personal experience with woman.

IMO, any man does themselves a great disservice when they write off entire categories of women based on what "someone says" without any experience and without judging each person as their own individual and on their actions and merits.

It says your ability to screen is very poor and you are trying to eliminate the possibility of making a bad choice rather than work on improving your ability to screen well.

Screen for what matters, not what your d!ck says matters.

 

[BaronOfHair]

Live in a smallish town with not a whole lot of great options for younger women...
Any advice on getting going?

Return to civilization, pronto... You're currently trying to hunt grizzly bears in the middle of the f-c-ing Gobi

 

[BPH]

To help I’ll answer BeExcellents questions here:
1. How old are you? 34
2. What country are you in? US, Town in the southwest. 50k population in the town I’m in but about 75-80k in the whole area close enough to consider dating
3. What is your height/weight? 6’3” 190 lbs approx, slender build. Going to make one room in my house a gym room soon here.
4. What is your ethnicity? White
5. What is you target ethnicity in a woman? White, more traditional woman that isn’t all tatted up and pierced all over preferably
6. What is your income level/source of income? About 200-250k a year, business owner/operator so I don’t have a lot of time.

I do have a 2.5 year old daughter so that plays a part in dating for sure. Up until recently I was open to dating a single mom (my baby’s mom had 2 other kids that weren’t mine, and recent gf has a kid a little younger than my daughter) but at this point seeing Rich Cooper talk about having all the responsibility and zero say in how things go in your own home as far as the kid that isn’t yours I’m good on all that rather be single.

Any advice on getting going? I remember reading a lot on outcome independence here before. Mostly need advice on openers that don’t sound canned for sure. Good ways to start a convo

The stuff in bold are the only potential problems I see.

You're a tall, assumedly in decent shape, white guy making $200k/year in a location that you've listed (supposedly) as Los Angeles.

It sounds like all you really have to do is go out into the world a little bit.

 

[dk1990S111]

If you don't wanna repeat the same $hit with the next girl, you better grew and learned your mistakes, cause if she mistreated you like that, you allow it to happen.


Be extremely careful taking women's advice on how to date women, fish can't fvcking explain water.


All of these questions and answeres are fvcking bull$hit to women, on paper you are " a catch" but if you mind is fvcked, you are gonna give cues that you are not the same on paper. Dating is not logic, no matter what you are, or who you are, its about feelings.


Who the fvck are you looking for a wife? Why don't you wanna date those girls? I can smell your desperation for women, but disguised as "woman that isn’t all tatted up and pierced all over"


Bro, what is it that you actually want? Fvck women, date women, marry a woman, having a gf, plates? Which is it?. You are all over the place, and you haven't even stated what the fvck you want.

100% have grown and learned from the experience with her. Why I’m a lot more careful about who I’m letting into my life. The tattoos and piercings are because (should have listened) my dad always said that a woman doing all that is a follower and doesn’t care how it might affect her ability to get a good man. Most millionaires that make their money honest ways aren’t looking for a tatted up chick to be their wife so she doesn’t care that the tattoos will limit her choice of the good men, or just impulsive which also isn’t great. Can see my other thread about the red flag nose piercing which is just about how she said she doesn’t care what I think. On to the next, can’t build anything with someone that doesn’t care what you think.

Ideally looking for a good woman that is actually marriage material. Sleeping with a bunch of women is great and all but rather find a good one that is worth investing in for lack of a better way to put it. So the goal with approaching is just to get more comfortable with it so that when I do see a girl that doesn’t look like one I’d have to worry about mental health problems I can easily start a convo with her no problem instead of overthinking it