"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Wait or Act?

Daniel1099

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so this girl iv been talkin to, we have been getting closer and i wana get into a relationship with her.

the problem is....she is grounded till her birthday which is in like 2 months.

when i say grounded...i mean she cant do ANYTHING. but have a friend over or something....

we hang out at school, and once in a while outside...but it sucks cuz she cant do anything...

she wants to wait till she is ungrounded to start any exclusivity...

but i feel like the ball is in her hands...and she has total control...

what should i do in this situation?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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I'm in the Mood

Master Don Juan
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You should act.

(If she wants you, being grounded won't make a difference.)
 

WalkingStick

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do SOMETHING.

I and probably many others have been burned by waiting too long. If you have her now, TAKE IT.

After writing those first sentences I read the part where it says she "doesn't want any exclusivity yet". This should be a red flag for you. If she really wanted you to ask her out, she probably wouldn't have said that. She might want some time to think or just not want it at all.

If you have the balls and think she likes you, just ask her out anyway, it's a definite answer and you wont be killing yourself for waiting too long.

If you think she's losing interest, keep yourself busy. You have a PERFECT excuse to go hang around other girls (she's the one who "doesnt want commitment"). If she's interested, you'll know it.
 

Daniel1099

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yeah for sure.

i know she wants me to ask her out.

but she thinks its going to be boring if we cant really hang out and do much...other then see eachother at school... thats why she wants to wait...

she made promise her that im not into her just for the physicle stuff (friends with benefits)

so i pinky promised her i dont want fwb. and that i want a relationship with her.

and then we whent back to lockin lips hahaha
 

Daniel1099

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so i can tell she wants me to ask her out.

just waiting for a good solid day where i can get some flirting in, and then pop the question.

one problem with this whole situation though...

me and this girl have been on and off for like 2 years pretty much...not dating...just having flings...

but just these last 6 months i stopped being the AFC. and i can tell she is really into me, because i dont have oneitis for her anymore....

but everyone is probably thinking..."WOW...Daniel is at her again...watch him get his heart broken again"....

idk what to do....
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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I'm in the Mood

Master Don Juan
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OK I only gotta say this once, u gotta ask her out once. And don't take "no" or "maybe" for an answer. Since you've been on and off, if she says anything but yes, NEXT her. You'll feel a burden lifted and you wont have to worry about having a relationship with her again.
 
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