video: The Dating Crisis Was INEVITABLE

[MatureDJ]

And to my curmudgeons that keep saying that I shouldn't spend my time researching this, I happened to see this on the side while I was getting my daily dose from the famous Whatever scene.

 

[Travel memoir21]

And to my curmudgeons that keep saying that I shouldn't spend my time researching this, I happened to see this on the side while I was getting my daily dose from the famous Whatever scene.

Why don't you show us a pic of yourself man. Your dating goals and what you ultimately want etc. Dude I bet your a decent looking guy because you said you lifted weights and go to the gym regularly.

 

[CoolWave1331]

Yeah you should. In my short time here I don't think i've ever seen one even remotely optimistic post from you, just futility and hopelessness.

Ever hear the saying you are what you eat? What do you think happens when all you do is watch doom n gloom content? It rubs off. If you want to say you have good reason to believe what the videos are saying are true, how come there are schleppy guys dating in today's 'tough" environment? I saw one such couple over the weekend at the park when I went for a run, we were using the same track. She was a nice looking blonde woman he wa some guy with a little pot belly and mustache. I'd almost bet it was her idea and she dragged him along because otherwise he'd hae spent the afternoon playing minecraft and eating takis

 

[Vanderdonck]

And to my curmudgeons that keep saying that I shouldn't spend my time researching this, I happened to see this on the side while I was getting my daily dose from the famous Whatever scene.

It's not that I think you spend too much time, but that you are stuck in a feedback loop of negative content. The more videos like this you watch the more will be fed to you - the algorithm is stupid like that.

And just look at the title: "The dating crisis was inevitable." What dating crisis? People are still dating. It's like "when did you stop beating your wife."

Agree w/posters above that maybe you should post your objectives and pics and stop posting angry emojis and doom & gloom stuff. This stuff is to be figured out, navigated, not used as an excuse.

 

[SW15]

feedback loop of negative content.

Even if @MatureDJ never minimal time on the internet and didn't engage with any mating environment content, he would be receiving negative feedback in person. He's below average height without having enough money to offset a below average height. That creates enough of a negative feedback loop.

 

[MatureDJ]

Even if @MatureDJ never minimal time on the internet and didn't engage with any mating environment content, he would be receiving negative feedback in person. He's below average height without having enough money to offset a below average height. That creates enough of a negative feedback loop.

I think I now have enough money to somewhat offset it - I have to learn how to peacock with it.

 

[SW15]

I think I now have enough money to somewhat offset it - I have to learn how to peacock with it.

Is your money making you attractive enough to get conventional dates?

 

[MatureDJ]

Is your money making you attractive enough to get conventional dates?

I haven't been "spreading it around". That said, I am in Eastern Europe, and as an American, I am presumed to have more money than the typical local.

I'm only at the wealth of what could be expected of a white-collar worker that has diligently saved over his career - a "Millionaire Next Door" situation. As you have said, that will be put me in high cotton with the American harridans - that I have ZERO interest in.

The Millionaire Next Door - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

 

[SW15]

I am in Eastern Europe, and as an American, I am presumed to have more money than the typical local.

That can help.

I'm only at the wealth of what could be expected of a white-collar worker that has diligently saved over his career - a "Millionaire Next Door" situation. As you have said, that will be put me in high cotton with the American harridans - that I have ZERO interest in.

The Millionaire Next Door - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

In the USA, a 60 year old man with your financial profile would be a Beta Bucks guy for a 50-59 year old harridan. That harridan is likely divorced 1-2 times. She is likely to have adult children either in college or newly graduated from college and living at home due to mass unemployment/underemployed of recent college graduates.

I'm not sure how much different the market would be in Eastern Europe.

 

[MatureDJ]

That can help.



In the USA, a 60 year old man with your financial profile would be a Beta Bucks guy for a 50-59 year old harridan. That harridan is likely divorced 1-2 times. She is likely to have adult children either in college or newly graduated from college and living at home due to mass unemployment/underemployed of recent college graduates.

I'm not sure how much different the market would be in Eastern Europe.

I'd go SEA before going harridan.

 

[SW15]

going harridan

Going harridan is a tough proposition. I've made it into my early 40s and have managed to avoid single moms. Single moms near my age typically have younger children.

The harridans closer to your age are more likely to have grown children.

I still appreciate that you taught me the word harridan.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Going harridan is a tough proposition. I've made it into my early 40s and have managed to avoid single moms. Single moms near my age typically have younger children.

The harridans closer to your age are more likely to have grown children.

I still appreciate that you taught me the word harridan.

It's only 2 keyboard spaces away from "harrydan"

 

[BaronOfHair]

And to my curmudgeons that keep saying that I shouldn't spend my time researching this, I happened to see this on the side while I was getting my daily dose from the famous Whatever scene.

Betting that NO ONE pressed a loaded gun to your skull, held a K-Bar blade to your neck, or/and dangled your kitten over a barrel full of sulphuric acid, then threatened to pull the trigger, open your neck, or/and drop that damned cat into the barrel, UNLESS you clicked on that video, then watched it all the way through

 

[Vanderdonck]

Even if @MatureDJ never minimal time on the internet and didn't engage with any mating environment content, he would be receiving negative feedback in person. He's below average height without having enough money to offset a below average height. That creates enough of a negative feedback loop.

What do you mean by negative feedback? Of course if he sees his height as a "negative" and puts that out there, it'll reflect back on him.

Not trying to be unrealistic, but frame still matters. Taking rejection as a negative is already getting off on the wrong foot.

I have a good friend who's below average, maybe 5'5" and he did well with women while single. Not rich either. And they weren't all shorties. His attitude was just indifference.

 

[SW15]

What do you mean by negative feedback?

Getting rejected on in-person approaches and having "one date, no sex, no second date" interactions off of swipe app or social media DM arranged first dates.

Taking rejection as a negative is already getting off on the wrong foot.

It is common to take rejection as a negative. We had a long thread about the perceptions of rejection recently.

The idea that rejection is nothing personal

I've seen the idea bounced around on the internet that it's nothing personal when a woman rejects a guy. That's the biggest bull$hit ever. Are there some instances where a woman's rejection of a guy is nothing personal? Absolutely. There are many instances, however, where the rejection is...

www.sosuave.net

Rejection is usually a sign that a man is lacking on "money, muscles, game". His looks aren't good enough and his personality isn't charismatic enough. It is likely that many men are approaching women not seeking new penis (especially in non-bar approaching). Even then, rejection is a bad sign. If a man offers enough value, a woman in a relationship not seeking new penis might monkey branch to him. That threshold of value is likely to be high.

 

[Vanderdonck]

Getting rejected on in-person approaches and having "one date, no sex, no second date" interactions off of swipe app or social media DM arranged first dates.



It is common to take rejection as a negative. We had a long thread about the perceptions of rejection recently.

The idea that rejection is nothing personal

I've seen the idea bounced around on the internet that it's nothing personal when a woman rejects a guy. That's the biggest bull$hit ever. Are there some instances where a woman's rejection of a guy is nothing personal? Absolutely. There are many instances, however, where the rejection is...

www.sosuave.net

Rejection is usually a sign that a man is lacking on "money, muscles, game". His looks aren't good enough and his personality isn't charismatic enough. It is likely that many men are approaching women not seeking new penis (especially in non-bar approaching). Even then, rejection is a bad sign. If a man offers enough value, a woman in a relationship not seeking new penis might monkey branch to him. That threshold of value is likely to be high.

Some good points. Here's my take though.

Rejection isn't real. She says no, you move on. Simple as that. Who was she? Nobody and you've lost nothing.

A lot of factors go into these things. Attraction, availability, time, preference, culture, extenuating circumstances, mood, period, you name it.

Rejection is neither negative nor positive. It's just a thing. Take it, learn from it if there's something to learn, move on.

The moment a guy interprets it to mean he's not "good enough" he's self sabotaging for the next girl. If a girl rejects me the problem is with her, not me. And it's not even a problem, per se, it's just how she wants it which is her right.

Regarding value, I used to see that in a similar light, but value has to be derived from within and not measured from without.

All of this to say women don't get to decide your value. It's a paradigm shift but it's essential IME.

We all have gone through a lot of rejection. Imagine if you start with $100 and each rejection cost you $1 but each "yes" gained you $1. We are probably all in the red, lol. Big time. But I'm not walking around thinking "I'm worthless." Reason being each rejection was a win in its own way - its value is worth its weight in gold.

I know this sounds all woo woo but it's a better tack than feeling worthless. Now if a man needs work - again that is for his gain, not hers. If a woman happens to be honest and gives reasons, either they will help him (hygiene, style, fitness) or it becomes moot (e.g. "I only date 6' and up - okay bye).

 

[SW15]

Rejection isn't real. She says no, you move on.

Rejection is real. It was a real life event.

She says no, you move on. Simple as that. Who was she? Nobody and you've lost nothing.

That sounds nice in theory. In practice, it might not work out like that. For a small number of rejections, that's applicable. However, there will be a cumulative negative effect with too many rejections and not enough successes to counterbalance the rejections.

Rejection is neither negative nor positive. It's just a thing. Take it, learn from it if there's something to learn, move on.

A lot of factors go into these things. Attraction, availability, time, preference, culture, extenuating circumstances, mood, period, you name it.

It can be difficult to learn from rejections if men can't recognize the patterns. Men rarely get informed of a reason for the rejection. There's guesswork is figuring out reasons for an individual rejection or a high overall rejection rate.

We all have gone through a lot of rejection. Imagine if you start with $100 and each rejection cost you $1 but each "yes" gained you $1. We are probably all in the red, lol. Big time.

I'm definitely in the red on this one and I have a high overall notch count. Former PUA Roosh mentioned that he had a very high rejection too. Roosh's height is 6'0"+ too and he was in shape during his PUA years.

 

[MatureDJ]

Is your money making you attractive enough to get conventional dates?

I think it would - but I can't go around with a sign saying what my wealth is.

 

[MatureDJ]

Rejection is usually a sign that a man is lacking on "money, muscles, game". His looks aren't good enough and his personality isn't charismatic enough. It is likely that many men are approaching women not seeking new penis (especially in non-bar approaching). Even then, rejection is a bad sign. If a man offers enough value, a woman in a relationship not seeking new penis might monkey branch to him. That threshold of value is likely to be high.

Rejection is the Sexual Marketplace saying you don't have enough in the bank to buy something.

 

[SW15]

I can't go around with a sign saying what my wealth is.

That's true. Best way to demonstrate wealth is with some possessions.