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Urgent: how to apply soft next.

derby1

Master Don Juan
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Current plate is getting more serious and pushing for LTR, trouble is, although shes not a bad woman. shes bringing a bit of drama recently. and ive noticed her drinking a bit too much on the weekend,

shes not a bad person, but i need to put it on ice a while, I'm happy to explain the current scenario isn't one I want to purse, I corrected some of her behaviour a few weeks and she needs to feel my absence now. (im prepared to lose her)#

My problem is she will undoubtedly start blowing my phone up, within 12 hours.

we have never been a couple who have ignored each other, and I dont want to set a bad taste, as she hasnt double crossed me etc. I feel blocking her will be a bit OTT

how do I lead the soft next, I've not done one before?
 

BillyPilgrim

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I suggest that during the course of casual conversation, say you're going to be super busy with some work-related project that's upcoming soon. Then, deploy the soft next with this excuse in your back pocket. If she blows up your phone, use this excuse and then use her behavior as evidence against her and then have the talk.

It's important to remember that it matters much, much more how they treat you than if they are a good or bad person in general.
 

BackInTheGame78

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"Hey, xxxxx. I just feel things really aren't going to work out between us long-term and while I have enjoyed getting to know you and spending time together, I would rather not waste any more time for either of us. I wish you all the best."

Just tell her what you need to tell her and keep it moving.

Men communicate overtly, women communicate covertly.

Soft nexts are for chicks
 

Steno

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You can't change lifestyle habits, there is no point in soft nexting her. Best case scenario she will stop drinking for like 3 weeks to a month and then right back to it. All you can do is HARD NEXT, move on and find a chick who has matured past that stage. You are subjecting yourself to headaches and extreme levels of stress if you continue seeing this woman.
 

BackInTheGame78

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Just tell her this isn't working out for you and that while you've enjoyed spending time with her, you don't see this going any farther and wish her the best of luck.

It's pretty simple, just tell her the truth.
 
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