"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Update

brian123

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Here is my update to the girl in this thread (Again, yea I totally F'ed it up initially, but I've learned alot).

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=147038

On July 1 she asked me to lunch/get drinks. I responded with drinks are good, how does 5 sound? She answered back a couple hours later with "sorry shopping with mom, can't do tonight"

7/7 She sent me a txt around noon saying "Hope you had a great weekend, let me know if you want to do drinks some night this week". I said yes, and that I'd call her wed. Yesterday I called and initially she said she had a ton of work that night, but that should would like to meet up that night. We txt'd a few times that day and eventually she said sorry, but she had a ton of work she had to get done, but was really sorry. I responded back with "No problem, let me know a good time for you and we can get together"

Right now, I am going to let HER do the chasing. Initially, it was always me trying to initiate contact, now I've let her ask me out the last few times. I plan on having her ask me next. I am going to focus on hunting out other broads, and if she "chases me" and we go out for a drink, then I make my move.

This sound good to everyone?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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chinwaggler

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might be a good idea if she offers one day, say you're busy and get her to re-arrange for another. but good going on getting her to ask you out
 

true romance

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Next time she txt you for drinks, tell her you are busing moving to Zimbawe to survey the election for the UN.

Stop being so available..she is clearly pulling you several times and you still answer with "when".

Answer her :

Next time she txt you for drinks, tell her you are busing moving to Zimbawe to survey the election for the UN.

You are busy iron your bed, you are busy flossing the cat...etc

She will get the message.

"No problem, let me know a good time for you and we can get together"

You should come up with better answer than this. Make her pay for flaking by asking your demands.

if she agree to have a drink with you. She will pay for all 3 drinks and give you a massage and wash your dishes in bikini.


You need to have balls and be C& F. call her on her BS.
 

brian123

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Agreed. Next time she asks, I am going to say I am busy, and then offer another time. (I've been waiting a while to respond to her txts etc... and trying to put off meeting dates) I will say that she initiatlly offered any night of the week, and I said wed (because it was the only one I was free really.)

I am walking the tightrope of me trying to show interest because I f'ed up at the start, and trying to not be too available.

Her contacting me is steps in the right direction though.
 

suavesuave

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what if she never asks u out? are u gonna wait forever?
i rather ask her out and do the move and if it doesnt work do next her.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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brian123

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suavesuave said:
what if she never asks u out? are u gonna wait forever?
i rather ask her out and do the move and if it doesnt work do next her.
Well I am not waiting around for her, just to make things clear. Technically, I was/am dating a few girls, but she was def the one I liked the best.


I think I am going to wait a week or two, and if she doesn't contact me I will just balls up and say something like "I would really like the opportunity to take you out on a date" and if she says yes, atleast I tried and my intentions were known, and if she says no, then I was just wasting my time anyways. To be honest, she has shown most of the physical initiative, and since I "saw the light" a few weeks ago, we haven't been together to let me finally balls up and try something, so I'm guessing there is a good chance she thinks I'm in it for only the friends aspect.

Less than 2 weeks ago, I was the one contacting her, now she is the one contacting me, so I feel myself on the right path.
 

longlifexs

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Well as long as she is contacting you, you should be fine and playing slightly hard to get shouldn't do any harm. Just make sure you maintain a balance between that and making her aware of your existence, if you get what I mean. If she thinks of you and chases you, it's great, but if you overdo the whole -waiting for her to contact you and being busy- thing, you might end up with her giving up and forgetting about you. But you seem to be doing just fine so far, keep it up :)
 

brian123

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longlifexs said:
Well as long as she is contacting you, you should be fine and playing slightly hard to get shouldn't do any harm. Just make sure you maintain a balance between that and making her aware of your existence, if you get what I mean. If she thinks of you and chases you, it's great, but if you overdo the whole -waiting for her to contact you and being busy- thing, you might end up with her giving up and forgetting about you. But you seem to be doing just fine so far, keep it up :)

When she responded back with "I cant make it" Should I have responded back with "Canceling on me again, it looks like you owe me an actual dinner date now ;)"
 

longlifexs

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brian123 said:
When she responded back with "I cant make it" Should I have responded back with "Canceling on me again, it looks like you owe me an actual dinner date now ;)"
That's a good one ;) Let us know how things go with her :)
 

brian123

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longlifexs said:
That's a good one ;) Let us know how things go with her :)
Ok, Im assuming I should give her atleast a week to contact me (make her do some chasing). If she asks me to drinks or something, what should my response be?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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brian123

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so i txt'd her last night about meeting up for golfing tonight. She said maybe, depending on work/how she felt (and that she was going to the cemetary today), but that she would love to go sometime. I told her to call me today to let me know what's up. As usual, she didn't get a hold of me today and her away message said that she was "outie :)"

This is like the 3rd time shes blown me off like that, even when sometimes she sends me a txt asking me for drinks, then cancels at the last minute. I'm done with that crap.
 
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