"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Ummm....help (for an intermediate)

Befuddled

Don Juan
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All right, been on these boards for a while now and been learning from your experiences as well. But I think imp messing up somewhere, and I need some help. I think I ought to lay out some experiences for you to illustrate my situations.
#1. Met girl at a party, struck up a conversation. Was going great, but she ended up mentioning her bf, which kind of threw me off course, but I handled it pretty well. She got a liking to me, I think; we talked for a good 20-30 minutes. Next day, a group of us went out on an excursion, I hung out with my other girl 'friend', so she paid more attention to another guy, which didn’t really bother me, but I would have preferred to be around her. I didn’t want to force to or make it too obvious. So im thinking that possibility tanked.

#2. Met this one at the same party, talked for a good amount of time. I was totally drunk.... I mean. I don’t remember her name or her face. But she [ad attention to me and I to her and I was pretty coherent. My friend, suddenly became a wingman out of nowhere and surprised the hell outtalk me when he came over and started telling the girl..."you have found the two collets guys in the village" or something to that effect. But that conversation tanked when we started talking about music/clubs/dancing...I was upfront and honest. She told me she liked R&B and hated techno. Personally I’m not a fan of either and I told her I could barely dance to either since im more the punk/rock fan. So time came to part, and her friends had started walking off and so had mine. So I asked for her number (she just got here and had a new phone), so she fumbled around looking for it, but couldn’t so I was like whatever, and we went our separate ways. I’m guessing that she prolly didn’t want to give me the number, so that tanked as well.

#3. Met this other girl, who is amazing cool and reasonably attractive. Haven’t gotten any clear positive signals from her cause we started hanging out in the same group and she treats all the guys the same, but I think we are getting a little close, not very visible, but we are. But im still hesitant cause she treats us all the same when we are ****y/funny with her.

#4. This chick and me had a LOT in common and we talked a lot when we went to the bars in a group and when we walked back from the bars. Then the next day she comes over and while she leaves I say 'cya later', and practically get shot down with 'I don’t think so'. So im pretty sure that’s a lost cause.shes currently gone chopping with a friend of mine. We exchange 'hi'-'bye' & 'hows it going's.

#5. Really cool girl...kind of like one of the boys. Met her one night, walking back fro mthe bars, and she suddenly starts ragging me out of nowhere, and tell me I have a skinny ass (and then grabs it quite freely). Next day I get a ' you have a very attractive nose, with a lot of character', and 'you should be in modeling' or something. BUT she seems to be spending more time with other guys.

#6. Met a whole bunch of girls (not at the same time), made good conversation and eye contact, but now when I see them I get a 'hi' and that’s about it. It’s friggon annoying....


I mean I don’t want to act too needy (cause im not) or anything, but why do you guys think it isn’t going any further than that? Im not out there being desperate and trying to bag a chick, im just being myself being 'cool' making good conversation, getting to know them a bit. And then nothing. I know where most of them live, except for the one I asked for the number, which I dint get. I mean whets your diagnosis? I need some help here.... seriously cause I’m feeling kind of disappointed.

Cheers.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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DankNuggs

Master Don Juan
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Maybe because you think of all of them as "lost causes" try to develop whatever kind of relationship with them that you can, its good practice, and they'll have friends for you to defile...

Its also definitely situational, and just because those girls didn't want you doesn't mean anything. Their are an infinite amount of reasons. Keep at it. Its cliche, but its definitely a numbers game.

Don't get down on yourself, this is supposed to be fun...
 

uniassign

Master Don Juan
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[why do you guys think it isn’t going any further than that? [/B]

Because you are not turning up the heat with these chicks.

#1. Met girl at a party, struck up a conversation

She talks to people EVERYDAY. Just because you think she is hot and you are talking to her, and she is talking to you means NOTHING.

To turn it into something more, you need to STAND out among the 1000000000 guys that hit on her THAT day. Do a bit of C&F, tease her a bit and bust her balls. Tell interesting stories that get her laughing, empathise, scared etc. you have to drive a chick's emotions in order to get her to be attracted to you.

im just being myself being 'cool' making good conversation, getting to know them a bit.

This works, but you must have something "attractive" going for you. When you observe people that behave like this, they are either rich, powerful or just very popular with everyone. When you don't have that base to work from, you must work yourself to be attractive.

This means you will have to develop a C&F attitude, fun nature and ball bust everyone.

At the moment, you are too "average" for chicks to notice you.
 

Befuddled

Don Juan
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Good point. so what do i need to do with these girls ? ****y n funny jokes are fine, ive done those. but now what ? give me soem specifics or examples i can work with.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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LordBrian

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If the girl is really hot, then you should neg her to bring down the beeotch shield... Basicly a neg is a insult hidden inside a comment... Its meant to take them off of their pedistal...I am horrible at them, so I cant really tell you examples except for...

"those nails are nice, are they real?" (i forgot who came up with this)
 

uniassign

Master Don Juan
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so what do i need to do with these girls ?

First you need to develop some interesting stories. You need to demonstrate to these girls how you are different from the rest of the mob.

Think of all the things you have done that are funny, interesting, exciting and shows off your qualities. this means you have to get to know yourself first. This is the hard bit.

Most people think that my style of PU is all about techniques, but if you haven't got the inner game to go with it, it is useless. So think of why you are the prize first.

Then once you have figured out what you are good at and why a chick should be with you, then you will have to work on stories to express those traits.

Then instead of seeking rapport with these girls when you talk to them, you tell them your funny, interesting, emotional and exciting stories. you will be the centre of attention because you are giving the chicks an emotional ride. This will set you apart.

Sprinkle in a bit of C&F, push/pull and general ball busting, you will create attraction FAST. Once you have attraction, THEN you move into rapport (asking what you do, what music you like BLAH BLAH BLAH).

So what you need to do is work on your stories.
 

Befuddled

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i got the stories. everthing from travel to drinking fiascos to sports. i tell em preety well. i mean i do have a life and a lot of funny/exciting stories to share. i usually get introduced to these women by other friends and do a good job of holding their attention, but i think im seriously missing a critical piece of the puzzle cause at the end, im left high n dry. i have a good time through it all too. it's not like im focusing all my attention on any one in particular either, i go around meet the regulars meet the new ppl, etc,etc....

its quite frustrationg...expecially not knowing what i missed.
 
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