Trying to find a way to deal with a flaky girl.

[LogicFalls]

Hello everyone, looking for advice on how to deal with a woman that plays too many head games. First off I met this woman about 2 months ago and things have were going great. Great sex, and great communication. She used to text me several times a day and I would always respond within a resonable amount of time (usually within 2 hours). We selpt together again 2 weeks ago and it was great. Then all of a sudden she started being flaky. For example she said she was going to come over last weekend and even called to say she was on her way. When a few hours past I try to call her and get the VM. She never shows up and calls me the next afternoon saying sorry she feel asleep. (We usually meet up late at night since I work in the evenings). I said its ok since I know she works in the morning. This happens again on the next day and again she uses the same excuse. Then the texting/comunication slowed down. Almost to one or two a day and she would take almost all day to respond. I tried using the step away treatment, and mirrored her actions. The last few days have been hell. She would call me at night and want me to stay on the line with her for 1-2 hours untill she was ready for bed saying she would call me the next day during the morning, then nothing. I would try to call her and get her VM, I would then text her 1 time and wait, and then nothing all day or night untill I got home. I'm sort of fed up with this game. I didn't contact her last night, but i tried once today. She responded several hours later to say sorry she was sick. My question is if she wants me to be around whats with the mixed signals? She says she wants to spend time with me and will do so this tuesday when she starts her vacation. I don't know if I should end this game, or give her a chance to make it up to me. She just texted me about an hour ago and I'm thinking I should just go no contact maybe to show her I have a life of my own that does not rotate around hers. What would you guys do?

 

[Unbridled_Phoenix]

You know the answer. And if it doesn't work out, remember the lessons you learned from this one:

1. Too much communication. NO TEXTING, this is one I see guys doing all the time, and you need to STOP. Stop spending your days worrying about whether some girl will respond to your text. Was that too c&f? What did she mean by that? GET A LIFE. When you are getting to know a girl, the phone is your ENEMY. Use it only to set up a date or party or whatever. Constant phone contact makes you too available--->no challenge---> probably needy too= death of female interest and attraction.

2. You were not in control of the frame. You didn't set boundaries, were too available, and allowed her to tool you around. You have much work to do, grasshopper.

I see you are new here. Read the DJ Bible and every Article and Tip on the homepage, then come back to the forums. Read everything on this site, the wealth of information here will first shock you, then awe you, next is anger & disillusionment, then you are working towards being who you want to be.

 

[DonJuan11]

Hello everyone, looking for advice on how to deal with a woman that plays too many head games. First off I met this woman about 2 months ago and things have were going great. Great sex, and great communication. She used to text me several times a day and I would always respond within a resonable amount of time (usually within 2 hours). We selpt together again 2 weeks ago and it was great. Then all of a sudden she started being flaky. For example she said she was going to come over last weekend and even called to say she was on her way. When a few hours past I try to call her and get the VM. She never shows up and calls me the next afternoon saying sorry she feel asleep. (We usually meet up late at night since I work in the evenings). I said its ok since I know she works in the morning. This happens again on the next day and again she uses the same excuse. Then the texting/comunication slowed down. Almost to one or two a day and she would take almost all day to respond. I tried using the step away treatment, and mirrored her actions.

The last few days have been hell. She would call me at night and want me to stay on the line with her for 1-2 hours untill she was ready for bed saying she would call me the next day during the morning, then nothing. I would try to call her and get her VM, I would then text her 1 time and wait, and then nothing all day or night untill I got home.

I'm sort of fed up with this game. I didn't contact her last night, but i tried once today. She responded several hours later to say sorry she was sick. My question is if she wants me to be around whats with the mixed signals? She says she wants to spend time with me and will do so this tuesday when she starts her vacation. I don't know if I should end this game, or give her a chance to make it up to me. She just texted me about an hour ago and I'm thinking I should just go no contact maybe to show her I have a life of my own that does not rotate around hers. What would you guys do?

1 - If a girl you're having sex with not answering your text right away is your definition of "hell", you'll be in for a surprise if you're ever a Prisoner of War

2 - How are you going to end this game? There is no way you will end it if continues to give you sex, don't fool yourself.

3 - Do not value this girl so much just because she's giving you sex. You're putting way too much stock into her. You're not husband / wife or gf / bf, she doesn't owe you anything and vice versa.

 

[909pua]

Hello everyone, looking for advice on how to deal with a woman that plays too many head games. First off I met this woman about 2 months ago and things have were going great. Great sex, and great communication. She used to text me several times a day and I would always respond within a resonable amount of time (usually within 2 hours). We selpt together again 2 weeks ago and it was great. Then all of a sudden she started being flaky. For example she said she was going to come over last weekend and even called to say she was on her way. When a few hours past I try to call her and get the VM. She never shows up and calls me the next afternoon saying sorry she feel asleep. (We usually meet up late at night since I work in the evenings). I said its ok since I know she works in the morning. This happens again on the next day and again she uses the same excuse. Then the texting/comunication slowed down. Almost to one or two a day and she would take almost all day to respond. I tried using the step away treatment, and mirrored her actions. The last few days have been hell. She would call me at night and want me to stay on the line with her for 1-2 hours untill she was ready for bed saying she would call me the next day during the morning, then nothing. I would try to call her and get her VM, I would then text her 1 time and wait, and then nothing all day or night untill I got home. I'm sort of fed up with this game. I didn't contact her last night, but i tried once today. She responded several hours later to say sorry she was sick. My question is if she wants me to be around whats with the mixed signals? She says she wants to spend time with me and will do so this tuesday when she starts her vacation. I don't know if I should end this game, or give her a chance to make it up to me. She just texted me about an hour ago and I'm thinking I should just go no contact maybe to show her I have a life of my own that does not rotate around hers. What would you guys do?

u have to think of the worst case..somebody else is hitting that and probably has a better d$ck than yours!

 

[Err0r]

yup someone else is gaming her and ****ing her in ways she likes better. If things go sour with that guy (or girl) she may be back, but next this chick

 

[Lion]

Go cold on her whilst you find some other girls, if she really wants you she would be apologising and more

 

[Kevin Feng]

I see this question all the time on the forums and honestly, I'd have to say this is a symptom more-so of too much micro-managing and not enough macro-management. In other words you're spending too much time, brain power, and emotions on one girl and it's driving you absolutely insane.

It's as if you invested all your money into one stock, when it moves up, you feel free, when it moves down, you feel like absolute sh*t.

Same principle applies to pick up, instead of focusing on one girl, you need to be actively pursing say 4-5. It's a little difficult when you start out, but if you consistently go out at least twice a week (as a good PUA should be), you should have enough phone numbers to keep you occupied. Plus, you won't be stressing out over one girl and WORRYING about being needy, because you genuinely won't be, you will ACTUALLY have other girls your working on.

I'm not a giant fan of the "fake it till you make it" approach, just be genuine and congruent with what you're doing"