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If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Trying Something Different and Transparent

BreezyB84

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Part of being reflective is being completely honest with yourself. I have many goals I want to achieve in life and being good with women is one of them as a 34 year old man.. Im not lonely, Im not looking for a girlfriend but I purely want to be better to attract better women. I think I know what Im doing.... I read a lot about what I should do but in complete honesty, I dont always do the right things... I need help. I am humble enough to admit that to a group of complete strangers.

So I am going to start posting my interactions with women, with complete honesty and transparency. I will do my best to try to post before I act because this is all a learning experience for me. I just want to figure this out once and for all, and create consistent success.

I currently in my life, I have 3 girls in my life... 2 could be prospects(not sure). One is completely in love with me and she stays the night from time to time.

The girl that is completely in love with me, is a beautiful girl but to be honest, she just isn't that smart. She is a nice girl but that purely stays in the bed and she knows that.

The second girl is a girl ive liked for a little over a year.. She really is cool, beautiful,successful... I know we arent supposed let girls linger and not get oneitis but its hard to not to like her... And part of it is my fault because ive never escalated with her.. She is hot and cold a lot.. So I give her as much space as I can and let her contact me... But we have a lot of fun together.. We are supposed to hang out next week, so we will see about that one.. I need to see this one through because I need to either get it right, figure it out, or let it go...

Then there is this girl at my job.... Well there are two actually. My job is really open minded and they somewhat encourage employee relationships so, I just chill. Im not a bad looking guy and I am a bit quieter, so I randomly get notes left at my desk for girls in the building... There is this new girl on my floor and she is cute..Brown hair, athletic body... I will make my way to talk to her somehow someway.

But an interesting thing happened today... There is pretty brown skinned Caribbean girl... Ive notice her a few times before but never said anything.. Today she was walking by my desk and I yelled out," Good morning! Dont look so sad! Smile!" And she smiled and started talking to me about the job and our futures with the company. As I was talking to her, I got a phone call and she nodded that she understood. But she did an interesting thing, she grabbed the notepad off my desk and wrote her number on it.... I dont want to jump to conclusions on that one.. She could be being friendly but, I just wanted to express that with everyone before I move forward...

I truly want you guys to be the controller and Ill be the video game. Learning doing it what I want to achieve... So ill take any and all advice if it makes sense...

I hope i am able to entertain you guys a littlle bit.. Thanx a lot.
 

mrgoodstuff

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Part of being reflective is being completely honest with yourself. I have many goals I want to achieve in life and being good with women is one of them as a 34 year old man.. Im not lonely, Im not looking for a girlfriend but I purely want to be better to attract better women. I think I know what Im doing.... I read a lot about what I should do but in complete honesty, I dont always do the right things... I need help. I am humble enough to admit that to a group of complete strangers.

So I am going to start posting my interactions with women, with complete honesty and transparency. I will do my best to try to post before I act because this is all a learning experience for me. I just want to figure this out once and for all, and create consistent success.

I currently in my life, I have 3 girls in my life... 2 could be prospects(not sure). One is completely in love with me and she stays the night from time to time.

The girl that is completely in love with me, is a beautiful girl but to be honest, she just isn't that smart. She is a nice girl but that purely stays in the bed and she knows that.

The second girl is a girl ive liked for a little over a year.. She really is cool, beautiful,successful... I know we arent supposed let girls linger and not get oneitis but its hard to not to like her... And part of it is my fault because ive never escalated with her.. She is hot and cold a lot.. So I give her as much space as I can and let her contact me... But we have a lot of fun together.. We are supposed to hang out next week, so we will see about that one.. I need to see this one through because I need to either get it right, figure it out, or let it go...

Then there is this girl at my job.... Well there are two actually. My job is really open minded and they somewhat encourage employee relationships so, I just chill. Im not a bad looking guy and I am a bit quieter, so I randomly get notes left at my desk for girls in the building... There is this new girl on my floor and she is cute..Brown hair, athletic body... I will make my way to talk to her somehow someway.

But an interesting thing happened today... There is pretty brown skinned Caribbean girl... Ive notice her a few times before but never said anything.. Today she was walking by my desk and I yelled out," Good morning! Dont look so sad! Smile!" And she smiled and started talking to me about the job and our futures with the company. As I was talking to her, I got a phone call and she nodded that she understood. But she did an interesting thing, she grabbed the notepad off my desk and wrote her number on it.... I dont want to jump to conclusions on that one.. She could be being friendly but, I just wanted to express that with everyone before I move forward...

I truly want you guys to be the controller and Ill be the video game. Learning doing it what I want to achieve... So ill take any and all advice if it makes sense...

I hope i am able to entertain you guys a littlle bit.. Thanx a lot.
So your only bedding the one that's in love with you? You need to dip your stick In another.
 

AttackFormation

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Sounds like you're already doing good. Just having multiple women who interact with you is most of the game already.
 

BreezyB84

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So I have a question and I hope it isn't a stupid one. I've been texting the girl back and forth a little and she was just basically asking some questions and trying to get to know me a little. She asked me a question, I answered.. That was about 8pm yesterday... I haven't gotten a response back yet. Part of me feels like I need to just chill and I really don't care if she response back. Another part of me feels like I need to ask a her a little bit about herself. I really didn't ask her too about herself because she was asking me questions about myself... Any thoughts?? I'm just trying my best to get the interaction right from start to ending.
 

BreezyB84

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Update:
Went out with the girl ive been dealing with for a year. She is the girl I think about the most to be honest... I told myself that the next time I see her, I would try to escalate and kiss her no matter what....

We go out... have a great time...touching,flirting, laughing and all of it... In my head, im thinking ,"Man, I actually have a shot at this." But when we went outside, something felt a little off but I had to do it because ive chickened out so many times before. I went for the kiss and i got denied. Immediately after it happened, I felt pretty good about myself because I went for it, and good or bad. But when I work up this morning, and even a little bit this morning, i feel bad because i guess I really liked her.. When she texted me yesterday morning, she said that she knew I was going to try to kiss her. So now I can let this go.. It will take a few days. She's still texting me and even talking about next time we hang out. I know I will not except that so it stings because I refuse be friendzoned..... I have to respectfully stop talking to her. But I am glad I tried kiss her. I stand by that.

There is this new girl at work I know from a previous setting and man, she is cute... I want to talk to her and see if I can get to know her a bit.. Weve crossed paths by a few times and she seems friendly...made I eye contact..... I even remember her name.. I want to talk to so I can move on to the next as quickly as possible.. Anyone have any thoughts on the best ways to do this??? Its usuallu girls at my job leaving notes on my desk..

Thank You all.
 

jaymbrs

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Update:
Went out with the girl ive been dealing with for a year. She is the girl I think about the most to be honest... I told myself that the next time I see her, I would try to escalate and kiss her no matter what....

We go out... have a great time...touching,flirting, laughing and all of it... In my head, im thinking ,"Man, I actually have a shot at this." But when we went outside, something felt a little off but I had to do it because ive chickened out so many times before. I went for the kiss and i got denied. Immediately after it happened, I felt pretty good about myself because I went for it, and good or bad. But when I work up this morning, and even a little bit this morning, i feel bad because i guess I really liked her.. When she texted me yesterday morning, she said that she knew I was going to try to kiss her. So now I can let this go.. It will take a few days. She's still texting me and even talking about next time we hang out. I know I will not except that so it stings because I refuse be friendzoned..... I have to respectfully stop talking to her. But I am glad I tried kiss her. I stand by that.

There is this new girl at work I know from a previous setting and man, she is cute... I want to talk to her and see if I can get to know her a bit.. Weve crossed paths by a few times and she seems friendly...made I eye contact..... I even remember her name.. I want to talk to so I can move on to the next as quickly as possible.. Anyone have any thoughts on the best ways to do this??? Its usuallu girls at my job leaving notes on my desk..

Thank You all.
Sucks to hear about what happened with the girl you really liked. I wouldn't accept another invite to hangout either however I wouldn't just decline the invite. I would be upfront and tell her why you're declining (you're sexually attracted to her and don't need a female friend) and move on. She'll at the very least respect you more and it could trigger something or it might not do anything. But at this point, you should move on to all the girls who seem to be wanting you at work.

And I do agree with the above posters that it sounds like you're already doing a good job. Granted these are women from work, it's still a luxury in my eyes to have that as an option for *****. It's like fishing with dynamite. Makes me miss my days of being a server.
 

BreezyB84

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Sucks to hear about what happened with the girl you really liked. I wouldn't accept another invite to hangout either however I wouldn't just decline the invite. I would be upfront and tell her why you're declining (you're sexually attracted to her and don't need a female friend) and move on. She'll at the very least respect you more and it could trigger something or it might not do anything. But at this point, you should move on to all the girls who seem to be wanting you at work.

And I do agree with the above posters that it sounds like you're already doing a good job. Granted these are women from work, it's still a luxury in my eyes to have that as an option for *****. It's like fishing with dynamite. Makes me miss my days of being a server.

I definitely agree with these sentiments.. The hard part is that she still texts me.. Do I just up and ghost her??? Am I polite about it??? I really wish I could just take a week and be left alone and kind of gather myself... I honestly thought that if I tried to kiss her, she would just leave me alone but that is not the case, and really does not seem to really care.. Either way, I need a minute to take it in I guess.
 

jaymbrs

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I definitely agree with these sentiments.. The hard part is that she still texts me.. Do I just up and ghost her??? Am I polite about it??? I really wish I could just take a week and be left alone and kind of gather myself... I honestly thought that if I tried to kiss her, she would just leave me alone but that is not the case, and really does not seem to really care.. Either way, I need a minute to take it in I guess.
I've been in a very similar situation. What was her reason for not letting you kiss her? If she gave the good ol "lets just be friends" line, then I would def just go no contact for a while. If she asks why, you tell her what I mentioned. You texting back to her makes you an orbiter and honestly it doesn't make things easier.

In my situation I went that route and tried to keep the lines of communication open hoping she would come around. It was a waste of time and I felt bad about myself.
 

BreezyB84

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I've been in a very similar situation. What was her reason for not letting you kiss her? If she gave the good ol "lets just be friends" line, then I would def just go no contact for a while. If she asks why, you tell her what I mentioned. You texting back to her makes you an orbiter and honestly it doesn't make things easier.

In my situation I went that route and tried to keep the lines of communication open hoping she would come around. It was a waste of time and I felt bad about myself.
Man... Today was rough... I thought about this girl all day.. I was cool, this weekend but man, it's setting in today... I really felt like texting her and just telling her how I feel, but too be 100 percent honest, I keep thinking about how in the end it doesn't matter and you just gotta keep it moving. I haven't heard from her since early Saturday and I'm kind of glad at the same time.. i think trying to kiss her was probably the last straw.
She never said why she didnt want to kiss me... Just said she knew it was coming...that was literally all.
But it doesn't make it any easier. So I will keep pressing forward and try to improve myself.

I got another # from a different girl today.. just really trying to move forward and keep options going.. slowly I will get back to my old self.
 

BreezyB84

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Been going out hanging with other girls… I am enjoying myself, and Im going out tonight again.. Its been cool getting out and just being around other people in general besides the women. And I meet quite a few women which is cool and ive been getting numbers..
I think the one thing im learning is, no matter HOW MANY woman you have in your life, if the other girls in your life aren’t than the one you REALLY like, you are still going to think about her… A lot… I cut the other girl off cold turkey, and its been hard. Shes texted me everyday, and when I feel like Im good and start to feel comfortable, she will send me a text and it will throw me off a little bit. Its been three days and I just haven’t responded at all… To be honest, I kind of feel like a jerk but I know I need to stop it. I just tell myself, “ Yea I still like her, but man,this aint working for me.” I just try to take a step forward everyday and be better. I got an interview for another position at my job Tuesday, working on some stuff for school and I am just grinding away… This is more of a vent post but I just want to stay on track and posting here helps me with that… Reading the DJ Bible has been helping me a lot too. When you read it, it all feels great and like you can do it.. But behaviorally, its against everything I'm used to.. But I'm trying!!
 

Alvafe

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welp I would hang out the that girl one last time and try to kiss her again, think about, now she knows you will want it, and in the 2nd time she don't let it happen then yes cut the contact, but after a year waiting, maybe a new try will work, not this weekend maybe in a 2 weeks more or less, still go out with others

and serious the only reason you are thinking of her is because you are invested a lot of time on her, don't waste much more time thinking just go for it, think of it as a you will give her a new chance since you did make her wait a lot, the worse is she says no again and then you are sure you can move on
 

BreezyB84

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I'm going to give it too the weekend and see how I feel and try not to think about it and keep reading the DJ Bible... Being rejected for a kiss was terrible man... After the fact is worse.. So I will take a second and step back from here and enjoy my time this weekend.. I really really thought that she would leave me a lone after I tried to kiss her. That was literally my wish, but welp, that's not that case.. So I will chill and chase more skirts and center myself.
 

Alvafe

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I'm going to give it too the weekend and see how I feel and try not to think about it and keep reading the DJ Bible... Being rejected for a kiss was terrible man... After the fact is worse.. So I will take a second and step back from here and enjoy my time this weekend.. I really really thought that she would leave me a lone after I tried to kiss her. That was literally my wish, but welp, that's not that case.. So I will chill and chase more skirts and center myself.
stop feeling emo about it, and get used to it, if anything you will get a lot more rejection before you start to score
 

BreezyB84

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Progress is slowly coming...but getting better...

Had an interview for a new job at work yesterday...Went well... Was even better that the women at my job saw me in a well fitted suit.. Win all the way around based on the response lol.

I spoke earlier about the new girl at work I thought was cute... I walked up to her yesterday gave her my number and told her I would like to get to know her. She smiled and I walked off.. And hour later I got a text from her saying, "So you have a crush on me huh??" We chatted a little bit and we are now working out the details of meeting up.

The other girl at my job is an interesting one... She is African American like myself but is gorgeous and has soooooo much energy. Ive dated a few African American girls in my life but not like this... So I'm in intrigued..

This is all good because the girl who rejected me for the kiss has been texting me quite bit lately.. Its hard NOT to talk to her but have some never options has been helping me...

I'm really trying to act out how i feel rather than be scared to be a man... What I mean I guess I was preconditioned like most men not be sexual... I am just trying to live my truth and be real and upfront now.. Its a learning process..

If anyone wants to give me some ideas on my new interactions I would appreciate it. The tall brunette I'm setting up the outing with is a bit of a tomboy but man.... shes.....man....that's all I can say lol. Room stopper....

And how do you guys handle being anxious?? I get really impatient sometimes.....
 

BreezyB84

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Last night I got stood up… Im a pretty sensitive dude, so I bothers me quite bit. It’s the second time in my life it has ever happened but this time bothered me more than the others because of how it happened. It truly enforces the nature of women and why you never should believe anything they say.
Me and the girl at work set up a date for Saturday.. I text her on Saturday to confirm and she did with an enthusiastic text. Our outing was supposed to be at 7:00pm and around 6:45pm I text her to make sure she knew where she was going… I didn’t.. I after 10 minutes, I knew I was being stood up and told myself if I don’t hear anything by 7:30pm I was going home.. 7:30pm hits, so I go home… At 9:15 pm I get a text that says, “I am so sorry!! Please don’t think I am a horrible person, please.”
The real emotional part of me wanted to say, “**** you, you lying selfish,emotionally unstable *****. Its ****ed up you could even give me the decency to say you weren’t coming. I hope you get pregnant by a dude who leaves you and never comes back.” That is honestly how I felt at that moment…
The good thing about the red pill is that if you truly understand the nature of women, you can be mad, but you just have to realize that these are women and that their emotions change. I am more away of this more than ever because Ive begun to put myself out there more.. It sucks…. Its hurtful that women don’t realize it is NOT ok to do this because they don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings or they are afraid of the backlash from a man…. I truly get it but man, this will jade me a little bit more and each time is a bit of a scar….
I waited an hour and replied back, “I’m sure you had your reasons. Enjoy your weekend.” Sent it and deleted her number. That’s the end of that.
I feel a little better this morning, but it still sucks… Song I will put a on repeat for the day,(Bas- Icarus) and try to ride that vibe for the day.
I wasn’t going to even post this but you can just post when things are going your way..

Girl who rejected my kiss… Still continues to text me… Even calls now…. Ive just put her on the back burner and I don’t know if she kind of realizes it now, but I really needed that distraction…
Happy Sunday to you Don Juans!!
 

BreezyB84

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Interesting few days...
Lets start with the girl who stood me up for my date a few weeks ago... She texted me the next day and told me not to hate her and that she genuinely really wanted to get to know me.. I thought about it and said what the hell,she seemed genuine.. So, we went out Saturday, and I discovered a couple things.. A Few I already suspected but had confirmed..

I need some help from the Don Juans on how to proceed.
The girl is a little masucline.. She is very hot but I got that vibe from her when we first met.... She is an avid crossfitter, her walk is not like a normal girl... And she is super super chill... Which leads me to my next point..
In the course of the outing, she told me how she was married to a woman for 2 years they've been divorced for a year.. I asked her has she always dated women and she said no, she always dated men, but she fell in love with this women and thought she was going to spend the rest of her life with this girl and that did not work out being she was controlling.. I wont lie, it kind of threw me off for the rest of the night but I didnt let it show but it still was a weird date... We had a good time doing Room Escape... There NO escalation in fact, there was no touching at all minus the hug at the beginning of the date.. When I dropped her off, I wasnt sure how she felt about the date. Within 20 minutes me dropping her off, she texted me to let me know she has "Great" time and would love to do it again... Then she doubled down the next day and admitted that she liked me...

Something about red pill awareness doesn't allow me to trust a woman's feelings anymore and even so in the last few months... I will admit I am a little jaded... And the fact she was married to a woman is a bit bothersome and I dont know why. I am ok with myself as man, so her being a bit masculine doesn't bother me at all.. Part of me likes it a little.. But I dont know... I just feel weird..

So now, she has opened up to me quite a bit more.. She has even gone as far to tell me how she has a dirty mind and her mind is always in the gutter... I guess the interest level is high and the only way to **** it up is if I **** it up.. I need a good idea for a second date.. We are both into fitness, and she doesn't drink and niether do I.. But I need to do something to increase some sexual tension.. Anyone got any ideas??


With that being said... I need to find another girl asap that is as fine as this one and that wont be easy because she is hot.... And shes tall too... Im a sucker for tall sexy fit women with asses and she meets all the criteria...

All help and thoughts are appreciated.. Thank you
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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Update:
Went out with the girl ive been dealing with for a year. She is the girl I think about the most to be honest... I told myself that the next time I see her, I would try to escalate and kiss her no matter what....

We go out... have a great time...touching,flirting, laughing and all of it... In my head, im thinking ,"Man, I actually have a shot at this." But when we went outside, something felt a little off but I had to do it because ive chickened out so many times before. I went for the kiss and i got denied. Immediately after it happened, I felt pretty good about myself because I went for it, and good or bad. But when I work up this morning, and even a little bit this morning, i feel bad because i guess I really liked her.. When she texted me yesterday morning, she said that she knew I was going to try to kiss her. So now I can let this go.. It will take a few days. She's still texting me and even talking about next time we hang out. I know I will not except that so it stings because I refuse be friendzoned..... I have to respectfully stop talking to her. But I am glad I tried kiss her. I stand by that.

There is this new girl at work I know from a previous setting and man, she is cute... I want to talk to her and see if I can get to know her a bit.. Weve crossed paths by a few times and she seems friendly...made I eye contact..... I even remember her name.. I want to talk to so I can move on to the next as quickly as possible.. Anyone have any thoughts on the best ways to do this??? Its usuallu girls at my job leaving notes on my desk..

Thank You all.
Respect !

Mate, you cultivate being "that guy" in a girlie man, soy boy, low testosterone society.

Next her.

I'm probably a sociopath but, I view every woman Hawttttttt for me wanting my **** in and around their mouth.

I act accordingly. I assume low sex drive otherwise
 
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