"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Trouble with meeting expectations.

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Darth

Master Don Juan
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I’m not a whiner so this is not really like me. But have to blow off some steam I’m 25 turning 26 middle of this year. So far I’ve failed out of 2 major jobs going back to 2013 and one graduate degree program. The reason for all three failures is that my bosses (or grad. program head) were pot smokers and didn’t like me for being so square (seriously that was it). Or they had fuzzy thinking and never gave me clear expectations (which was also the case).

Whatever the reason, I am without a job again. Yeah I have some minor stuff (3 jobs) but it’s not full-time. I want a really kick a$$ sales or marketing job. I have an aggressive work ethic once I have CLEAR F-ING EXPECTATIONS. I am stable and sharp.

By the way the last job I lost, someone put a drug in my drink and I had to go to the hospital. Just par for the course but really F-ing STUPID can’t believe I’m living in 2016 with a generation of MORONS.

Sorry I don’t really mean that there are a lot of good ones. But I could not have less respect for the Baby Boomers than I do now as a whole. All 3 (actually 4 now) major opportunities I lost were because a Boomer decided they didn’t like me. A$$es.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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D

Darth

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I want to work with someone with a soul, who claps me on the back with a warm smile and says "Good morning Darth! Here is your work today, I'd like you to get 5 things done today: 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5. Any questions? Good. Let me know if you need anything, I'll be in my office all day, and I'll let you know right away if you aren't meeting expectations. Great job, keep it up."

That would be GENUINELY encouraging but maybe I'm living in fantasy land here
 
D

Darth

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O wait, I just remembered I'm not a loser. Just snapped out of it, now aggressively pursuing work . . .

;)
 
Glumix

Glumix

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Dear Darth,

Screening your jobs is like screening women. Don't go with the crazies. And finding a job is like finding a women. Elevate yourself so that they pursue you.

There are about 1 billion Indians who are paid 3 bucks an hour to do exactly what we ask them. If you love to work in a cubicle from 9 to 5 it's great to want expectations being given to you every morning.

Otherwise, learn to be creative, to have a larger vision of what a company is and what your job is and create your own signature in every task you do. Be pro-active and take responsibility. They will love you.
 
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