You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Any one of:Originally posted by Recluce
what is she really saying?
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Bullshyt. If she's trying to control herself, why is she putting herself in that kind of position when she has a BF?Originally posted by rgeere
What she means is that she finds you attractive, but wants to control herself. It is nothing personal against you.
No, that is exactly what she means.Originally posted by jprjrjr
Bullshyt. If she's trying to control herself, why is she putting herself in that kind of position when she has a BF?
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
How is that any diffrent than what I said?Originally posted by jprjrjr
I don't think that's what she means at all. I think she's a hor, and likes to flirt with guys, then suddenly remembers she has a BF. I don't think his "attractiveness" has anything to do with it. I think she just gets off on it.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Not necessarily ... I know plenty of wh0res who have refused to bang a guy they are attracted to because of what they consider to be the context of their life, so they thrive on the attention instead.Originally posted by jprjrjr
if she was really attracted, she'd bang him first, then make up some excuse why she shouldn't have done that.