"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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To ask or not to ask to sit at a table that a guy you know is at?

static

Don Juan
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I sometimes see a guy or guys that I know at a table in the cafeteria. If I'm looking for a table and notice them, then I'll go up to them and say hi, but then instead of just sitting down, I say "is anyone sitting here" and then proceed to sit down. I've done this before to a group like that of situation (a.) below and I sensed it was lame--they expected me to join them without asking.

Because I'm trying to stretch myself in trying to make friends, I included a situation (b.) below. I'd like to get advice about how to handle guys in that category.

For the future, what do you guys suggest: Just go over to them and sit down and say hi with no hesitation, or to ask first?

Consider these two situations:

a. You've hung out or ate with this guy/or these guys before.

b. You've never hung out with this guy or these guys, but you are gradually increasing your communication with him/them. Ex: You talked to him in class a few times, then later you exchanged "sup" in the hall ,and then even later, you walked down the hall with this guy and talked

Lame question, I know...but I want to improve my social game and make more friends,
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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rgeere

Master Don Juan
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If people like you they will want you to sit with them, if they really really like you they will want to sit with you.

Just act friendly, when people come to the table invite them to sit down, and if a chick sits down, have a discussion with her.
 

Capi Crimini

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Don't ask sit. or If your afraid to sit. pull up a chair from another table. That way your not taking anyone's seat. If you sit down and there like someone's sitting there just move. Unless your enemys or look like a freak nobodys gonna say get the **** away.

Sit down.
 

DJmonster

Don Juan
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a) just sit

b) It's always good to ask, if you've never sat with them before. It's a good polite gesture.
 

diablo

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"Hey, whats up man... anybody sitting here? Okay, cool. Man, I think I'm going to bomb this exam coming up - how about you?"

It sounds like you've already got a rapport with the guy, and having friends is always a plus in anyone's book. Definitely sit down, give the above phrase (or some variation of it) a try - feel free to change it to suit your needs. I'm pretty sure that, unless you're a freak or something like Capi mentioned earlier, they won't mind you sitting there. Make sure you're interesting, don't ***** about something they aren't already *****ing about, or if you do *****, that it's something that you know for sure they'll all be able to relate to and agree with you about.

Hope this helps, good luck.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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