I have always dreamed of writing a book, but my writing skills are lacking. Anyone know how to become a better writer? Any help would be appreciated. If you have any tips/advice that could help me I would be eternally grateful.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
--excerpt from Wonder BoysNobody teaches a writer anything. You tell them what you know. You tell them to find their voice and stay with it. You tell the ones that have it to keep at it. You tell the ones that don't have it to keep at it, too, because that's the only way they're gonna get to where they're going. Of course, it does help if you know where you wanna go.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Literature/writing courses in college helped me. Are you going to college? I couldn't write worth a dam* when I first went.* You can learn there.Sojourn said:I have always dreamed of writing a book, but my writing skills are lacking. Anyone know how to become a better writer? Any help would be appreciated. If you have any tips/advice that could help me I would be eternally grateful.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
That is EXACTLY what I have been doing. As a matter of fact, I made a conscious decision to do so. But that had nothing to do with losing my voice. That happened due to putting myself in a vampiric situation with empty souls, that left me dry and speechless, literally.SalParadise said:iqqi, thanks for the recommendation, I haven't seen 'Bird by Bird' before.
If you've lost your voice, why not take a leaf out of Bukowski's book? Quit writing for a few decades, and take on a series of weird dead end jobs where you come into contact with the broken and dispossessed, and fill yourself with stories to tell?
That's one of the great things about writing - wasting decades of your life on booze and *****s can be the very best thing for your career. No wonder the craft attracts free spirits.![]()
I think I got two books here confused. The one I love is Writing Down the Bones, and Bird by Bird (Lamont) is also good.iqqi said:OH! I agree that Stephen King's On Writing is fab, but my absolute favorite book on writing is Bird by Bird by Goldberg.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.