Y'know where most people on this board run into problems? They go out on every first date with the goal of trying to bed this girl that night... and it shows. Women can smell the desperation of every guy they go out with because they all do the same thing. In fact, I can probably guess what your game plan will be:
1. Say something with a sexual innuendo or connotation to it
2. Initiate KINO or some kind of touching so she knows you want her
3. Suggest going somewhere alone with her (i.e. "Hey, let's continue this convo back at your place")
4. Mentioning how sexy you think she is so she'll be flattered enough to open her legs
And when you do all this stuff, she's going to think you're on this date solely to bed her, and it's going to lessen your chances of having it happen.
Now me, I've had sex with a decent amount of girls ("decent" meaning a lot for me, but not gigolo numbers since I am trying to find someone to marry), and the majority of my lays have taken place on the SECOND date (though one could argue that, since most of my first dates are coffee dates, my lays are technically taking place on the first REAL date). My secret? I act like the COMPLETE OPPOSITE of all the other guys trying to take them out.
What does this mean? On the first date, I completely throw out the idea of scoring any kind of sex with a girl. In other words, I am the one that completely takes the option off the table. It puts ME in control of when it happens, but it also takes the pressure off me to have to work so darn hard just to get a lay - I'm able to go on a date and be myself, and since I'm more focused on showing the girl a good time and having fun, there's no sense of desperation coming from my end.
Furthermore, I let her know that she's being qualified. The few times I hear a girl say something like "well, don't expect anything sexual from me on our first date," you know what I do? I respond back with, "ha ha ha, and what makes you think I'm trying to get some from you tonight? I don't even know you yet - for all I know, you could be a crazy person, and I like to take my time." Then, I spend the whole night NOT touching them and NOT trying to stare at them like I'm thirsty for their body. But I still show them a good time - I make them laugh, open doors for them, and give them ONE lightweight compliment (i.e. "that's a nice dress" or "hey, good job on the hair") .
Here's what I've discovered: do you know what happens when you don't try touching them, or mentioning sex to them? THEY become the ones that start doing it to ME! By not doing those things, it makes them question if I find them attractive, which causes them to want to do things to validate their attractiveness - things like touching me; asking me questions about my sex life or saying sexual innuendos; telling me how sexy I look (how's that for a shocker??); paying for my meal; giving me the "I want to make out with you" look... and so on.
Now, if she's throwing those types of signals at me... at that point, I could probably go in for the kill and try to get some, but I've also learned the art of patience and making them wait. So, if they're looking like they're down for a sack roll by the end of the first date, I make a note of it and wait until the second date. That way, they've had time in between the first and second date to reminisce over how good of a time they had with me on date one, which only helps to build up interest. By the time they see me on date two, they can barely control themselves!
So, in short: if you want my advice, don't try and have sex with her on the first date. Show her a good time, let her know you find her attractive, but that she's not the only one of you two making someone wait for sex. Get some drinks, some food, go in for a hug at the end of the night... and leave it at that. Then, if the date goes well and you're getting a good read on her interest level, wait 4 days to call her up, ask her out again, and try to score then - but again, don't make it the focus of your date or it won't happen. Hope this helps!
Night'
