"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Tip on setting this date up

djthiago1

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Im trying to get a date with this girl i started messaging on IG that goes to my uni, apparently she wants to see me first, how do i this properly? I don't want to hang out and talk about everything we should be talking at a real date.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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marmel75

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Turn it into a date then
 

djthiago1

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Wait, thats starting to sound like a good idea, i could bring some ice cream, we could find a more private place and do it right then and there, i'll have to clarify that it is a DATE though, else she's gonna think it's just a little meet. I still think it's gonna be a little weird, you sure that can work?
 

Bible_Belt

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Ask her to join you at something you are already going to do.

And stop thinking about the word "date" in such a narrow way. It is a good word to drop from your vocabulary altogether. Women don't like it, either, too much pressure. You dont date, you just hang out and do stuff...and have sex.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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djthiago1

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Ask her to join you at something you are already going to do.

And stop thinking about the word "date" in such a narrow way. It is a good word to drop from your vocabulary altogether. Women don't like it, either, too much pressure. You dont date, you just hang out and do stuff...and have sex.
I actually disagree with everything you just said, i'm not going to argue though.
 

jaymbrs

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I'm curious to know how you managed to get the interest of a chick on IG when she doesn't even know what you look like.
 

djthiago1

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I'm curious to know how you managed to get the interest of a chick on IG when she doesn't even know what you look like.
Same way you'd spark interest through Online Dating, a good job, education, and some cool pictures. There's no secret.
 

Bible_Belt

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If you are looking for girls who will make you spend money on them before you have sex, then yes, telling them you have a good job is the right thing to do. Maybe you are looking for a wife, and that is your definition of wife material. That's up to you.
 

djthiago1

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If you are looking for girls who will make you spend money on them before you have sex, then yes, telling them you have a good job is the right thing to do. Maybe you are looking for a wife, and that is your definition of wife material. That's up to you.
There's no need to tell, it's in my description. Also, gold diggers don't do coffee dates, i always go for a first coffee date. I always screen them out. I never have to spend money for sex, i actually reject sex before i get more time in. Not everyone is a sex addict.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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