Thoughts on Women Who Own Homes

[SW15]

Just take a moment and think to yourself why that is...

Similar lifestyles...it's not profound.

 

[member160292]

Similar lifestyles...it's not profound.

 

[Giovanni SouthSide]

I am incredibly turned off by women with advanced degrees, professional careers, and "homeowners". Women cannot usually become that successful without sacrificing their femininity to some degree. Or in most cases all it does is make them more entititled and arrogant.

Also, in 99% of these cases, they're not homeowners, their banks are.

co sign. The more education and degrees a woman has the lesser of a boner I get.
Most of these types indeed act like their sh!t dont stink. They will challenge you all the time and have feminist traits.

I'd rather take the cute azz cashier working a minimum wage job at the local store who is a hustler at heart but hasn't damaged her feminine spirit and knows her position in a relationship.

 

[member160292]

Why do I have a feeling that most men on here live outside of the 20 cities to live in the US?

It takes money, if you’re good with bangin gas station cashiers on the first approach kudos to you. But, is it’s all about the notch count While neglecting other aspects?

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

I remember Coach Greg Adams dumping on these single women with homes. He said they would buy stupid homes like 2 bedrooms and 1 bath and be upset when they couldn’t sell it.

Also, my friend's ex bought a house during their relationship, and I told him that it was over at that point, and he was like nah dude.....They broke up 5 months later.

 

[corrector]

I was invited to move into a home of an ex-gf back in 2020, she wanted to get marry me and offered to make a child with me. However, she was schizo on meds and I wouldn't want to do something that would put myself in harms way. (She can come up with delusions thinking I've cheated on her, or resent the fact I got married to someone else in 2014 and shut her out at the same time, etc..) She was completely devoted with me though so it would come like I would have my own home while sexing up with her like a toy. I just can't go that low and we stopped communicating. I chose to live with my folks than with her. We last met in person back in 2013 sometime.

 

[SW15]

I remember Coach Greg Adams dumping on these single women with homes.

Why does Greg Adams object to single women with homes? Is it possible he's had similar experiences to me.

He said they would buy stupid homes like 2 bedrooms and 1 bath and be upset when they couldn’t sell it.

What's stupid about a 2 bedroom, 1 bathroom house? Wouldn't it be possible to re-sell it to some Boomer look to downsize in their retirement years?

Also, my friend's ex bought a house during their relationship, and I told him that it was over at that point, and he was like nah dude.....They broke up 5 months later.

The few homeowners I've gone on dates with bought something like 1-3 years before meeting me. How did you know it was over for your friend at that point?

 

[RickTheToad]

My youngest sister is similar to myself. She is a homeowner (bought her home by herself post divorce in the area where we grew up). Like me she makes a solid six figure income and she is attractive in her mid forties.

She has two children who she has primary custody of and she keeps getting offers to be a VP of a large company (which she so far has declined because her focus is child rearing.) She works from home and is financially self sufficient as I am.

It’s interesting this thread. You really kinda seem to want it both ways. You don’t want a woman depending on you for financial support or resources, and you see financially self sufficient women as feminist types (do you don’t want them either). My sister and I are anything but feminist types where men are concerned, but neither one of us is sitting around waiting to be rescued by some guy either.

I mean homeowners over time accumulate more wealth than non homeowners. Homeowners also have greater economic stability and security. Homeowners are more likely to have their act together in life and I cannot fathom how that is a negative. You can have “go girl” feminist types who are NOT homeowners.

This is a ridiculously false correlation in my mind.

Now I fully get that you guys might see children still at home as a negative. I can tell you that has never impeded my options at all, I think it does affect my sister to a greater degree. Her children are considerably younger than mine and therefore less self sufficient. She also has a contentious ex husband who will take her back to court for joint or switched custody if he thinks she is being too “social” or if her profession starts to require travel whereas he has been remarried for a number of years (he cheated, left the marriage and married his mistress) which is very different than my first husband who is chill and we basically ignored our divorce decree from the jump. He and I get along well, her ex is still an ass to her at every opportunity. A new beau isn’t going to want to deal with that situation and understandably so. She knows this. So she is focused on building wealth until such time as her social constraints relax.

Just as I have focused on building wealth. That’s what successful people do. No way am I going to be a financial burden to my children. Nope.

Seems like she picked a real winner...

 

[RickTheToad]

There's a lot of overlap between advanced degrees, professional careers, and homeowners. I prefer women with no more than a bachelor's degree from a not elite university. I proceed with caution with advanced degrees.

I have noticed entitlement and arrogance in those 3 frequently overlapping subgroups.



Yes, that's true.

Even though Adam Conover is a bit of a soy boy, he has a legitimate point here. The bank/financial institution isn't much different than paying a landlord. At least when you rent, the landlord fixes stuff. In a mortgage, you are paying rent to the bank and they're not fixing your plumbing or HVAC.

I disagree. You are building equity, you can always rent or sell the home, and you can cashout refi and/or obtain a HELCO relatively easily. Can't do that as a rental. There are also various tax benefits that are pretty grand. If you own it yourself, stay there two years and it increases in value, the profits up to 250k (500k if married) are tax free.

Adam Conover is entertaining, but I wouldn't take financial advise from a tool.

 

[SW15]

I disagree. You are building equity, you can always rent or sell the home, and you can cashout refi and/or obtain a HELCO relatively easily. Can't do that as a rental. There are also various tax benefits that are pretty grand. If you own it yourself, stay there two years and it increases in value, the profits up to 250k (500k if married) are tax free.

Adam Conover is entertaining, but I wouldn't take financial advise from a tool.

Wealth manager: Buying a home is 'usually a terrible investment'—here's why

Certified financial planner and wealth manager Peter Mallouk explains why buying a home is usually a terrible investment, adding, "A lot of people will tell you that buying a home is a good investment — and that couldn't be further from the truth."

www.cnbc.com

 

[member160292]

Any single woman homeowner without kids, younger than 32 is a green light for me. It shows maturity, accountability and has a plan in life.

 

[BeExcellent]

Seems like she picked a real winner...

High school sweethearts. He developed a case of FOMO after they had been married for years and had two children. As he grew in his career he became more & more ass hole & entitled attitude. As in entitled to cheat, entitled to withold sex from her, he bad mouthed her while they divorced although since the divorce the family (including HIS parents) have come to see his behavior for what it is. The children have come back from his weekends with bruises and at one point a fracture. These mystery injuries were not treated at the ex husband’s house and he has a wicked nasty temper and is a big strong man at 6’4” 250. My sister has been told to document everything by both child therapists that she has started the kids with (over the ex husband’s protests in an effort to assure their safety & wellbeing.). She is aware that her ex routinely bad mouths her to her kids (they tell her so) and she is as neutral as possible regarding her ex husband, taking the high road rather than bad mouthing the kids father. Any family law attorney or therapist will tell you that bad mouthing the other parent is harmful to children. She vents to me at times but keeps a stiff upper lip otherwise.

Unfortunately she could not see how he would change once they were married. Just like men here who had wives who became nasty over time after marriage or entitled or lazy. You cannot always know how someone would change.

So it’s the same as men who ended up here after a nasty relationship experience. He ended up being/becoming very nasty and narcissistic. Not to mention possibly physically abusive to his own kids. Sorry. That’s not a good person and you can’t always know.

All any of us can do is the best we can given available information at any given time. When information dictates different course of action? Especially where little kids are involved? You gotta do what keeps them safe. That is why she got primary custody and why she will not jeopardize that custody agreement for anything. He’s slick & proving her suspicions would put the kids through hell. So she protects them the best she can under the current circumstances.

It’s not a good situation but she knows what she is dealing with. So yeah.

Sometimes you get a bad apple that does not reveal itself right away.

Same thing happens to men where women are concerned.

 

[Bokanovsky]

Wealth manager: Buying a home is 'usually a terrible investment'—here's why

Certified financial planner and wealth manager Peter Mallouk explains why buying a home is usually a terrible investment, adding, "A lot of people will tell you that buying a home is a good investment — and that couldn't be further from the truth."

www.cnbc.com

This is a funny article. A guy who makes his living selling bonds and stocks tells you that real estate is a bad investment and that you should buy bonds and stocks instead. Okaaay.

 

[Bokanovsky]

I don’t see any problem with homeownership. If anything, it shows that she is at least somewhat financially prudent. Would you rather date a woman who saved up $100K and put it as a down payment on a house or a woman who spent $100K on purses and shoes?

 

[RickTheToad]

I actually agree with @FlexpertHamilton here. I own dozens of rentals, most are free & clear, but I rent where I reside. On purpose. The central AC broke last month. 12K for a new system. Landlords expense. Not mine. And they put us in a hotel until it was fixed.

My guy doesn’t really grasp why this is smart, but it is.

High school sweethearts. He developed a case of FOMO after they had been married for years and had two children. As he grew in his career he became more & more ass hole & entitled attitude. As in entitled to cheat, entitled to withold sex from her, he bad mouthed her while they divorced although since the divorce the family (including HIS parents) have come to see his behavior for what it is. The children have come back from his weekends with bruises and at one point a fracture. These mystery injuries were not treated at the ex husband’s house and he has a wicked nasty temper and is a big strong man at 6’4” 250. My sister has been told to document everything by both child therapists that she has started the kids with (over the ex husband’s protests in an effort to assure their safety & wellbeing.). She is aware that her ex routinely bad mouths her to her kids (they tell her so) and she is as neutral as possible regarding her ex husband, taking the high road rather than bad mouthing the kids father. Any family law attorney or therapist will tell you that bad mouthing the other parent is harmful to children. She vents to me at times but keeps a stiff upper lip otherwise.

Unfortunately she could not see how he would change once they were married. Just like men here who had wives who became nasty over time after marriage or entitled or lazy. You cannot always know how someone would change.

So it’s the same as men who ended up here after a nasty relationship experience. He ended up being/becoming very nasty and narcissistic. Not to mention possibly physically abusive to his own kids. Sorry. That’s not a good person and you can’t always know.

All any of us can do is the best we can given available information at any given time. When information dictates different course of action? Especially where little kids are involved? You gotta do what keeps them safe. That is why she got primary custody and why she will not jeopardize that custody agreement for anything. He’s slick & proving her suspicions would put the kids through hell. So she protects them the best she can under the current circumstances.

It’s not a good situation but she knows what she is dealing with. So yeah.

Sometimes you get a bad apple that does not reveal itself right away.

Same thing happens to men where women are concerned.

Truly unfortunate situation.

 

[RickTheToad]

I actually agree with @FlexpertHamilton here. I own dozens of rentals, most are free & clear, but I rent where I reside. On purpose. The central AC broke last month. 12K for a new system. Landlords expense. Not mine. And they put us in a hotel until it was fixed.

My guy doesn’t really grasp why this is smart, but it is.

Wealth manager: Buying a home is 'usually a terrible investment'—here's why

Certified financial planner and wealth manager Peter Mallouk explains why buying a home is usually a terrible investment, adding, "A lot of people will tell you that buying a home is a good investment — and that couldn't be further from the truth."

www.cnbc.com

He's wrong. I own several multi-families. However, one cannot generalize on everyone. Buying in a major metro is always a plus, but the surrounding areas can also be good options.

 

[zekko]

It’s interesting this thread. You really kinda seem to want it both ways. You don’t want a woman depending on you for financial support or resources, and you see financially self sufficient women as feminist types (do you don’t want them either). My sister and I are anything but feminist types where men are concerned, but neither one of us is sitting around waiting to be rescued by some guy either.

Good point. I remember when I first came to this forum, there were a number of guys insisting that no wife of theirs would ever work. But I rarely hear such a comment anymore. Actually, few guys on here want to get married, for that matter. I guess it's the new reality. But in this economy, and with people getting married later (if ever), it's not realistic to expect women not to be financially independent.

I know single women who own their own houses (not sure if they're mortgage-free or not), but most of them were either married and kept the house after they got divorced or their husband died, or they inherited it when a parent passed away.

So how many here are free & clear on your residence?

My house is paid off, but you'd probably expect that from someone my age. I know a couple in their 70s though, that just took out a 30 year mortgage on a new home. They'll never pay it off.

 

[The Duke]

The majority of the girls I dated that owned houses also struggled to pay for them. They would buy way too much house and not have a large enough cash reserve to weather the tough times like a job loss or expensive car repair medical bills. They all look for guys to get serious with when that happens. Women are rarely as good at managing money as men. They make too many emotional decisions.

 

[SW15]

The majority of the girls I dated that owned houses also struggled to pay for them. Women are rarely as good at managing money as men. They make too many emotional decisions.

I believe this. Do you think the female renters you dated made poor decisions in selecting rentals?

 

[The Duke]

I believe this. Do you think the female renters you dated made poor decisions in selecting rentals?

The ones that realized they weren't planning on staying in the same place for more than 5yrs made the right decision to rent and that's most of them.

However one i dated insisted on renting a house and was there for a long time and the rent kept rising to a point it was more than my house payment. I finally convinced her she needed to buy a house and stop making a landlord rich. She was never going to move in with a guy because she had her elderly mom live with her and wasn't ever going to move to a new city.