There is this girl at work, we get hired at the same time, so we had some rapport going. She seemed very interested in me, i always catch her staring at me, and i wink at her and stuff, you know the usual stuff, anyways i was planning to ask her for phone #, but then on her lunch her "boyfriend" came in (i was caught off guard lol i had no idea" then apparently he just bought her a sweater and when she came back she was telling me and one other guy how she's getting spoiled by her boyfriend, and how he always buys her stuff... anyways should i still chase her and ask for email or phonu number or just give it up....
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
this girl at work
- Thread starter titoman
- Start date
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
DonJuanMonk
Master Don Juan
Well, you can always jump off the bridge.
Alphathree
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Aug 4, 2005
- Messages
- 404
- Reaction score
- 1
Chase?.. her?
You have much ... to learn... young... jedi..
You have much ... to learn... young... jedi..
DJohnson
Don Juan
FIRST
You work with her, you let her make explicit moves on you, not the other way, unless you want to get punished.
SECOND
You don't chase a girl ever. You become an attracive man, you date other chicks, and then THEY chase you. I know that is hard to get, but yes, get to a certain level in terms of your peronsal growth and attitude and THEY do the chasing.
THIRD
She isn't flirting. Getting a new job is stressful for anyone, especially a girl. Don't read to much into her "staring" and "smiling". Just take it in stride and be cool. Give subtle hints that you are a cool guy who has fun, and has friends, and also dates other women. This is THE workplace plan.
You work with her, you let her make explicit moves on you, not the other way, unless you want to get punished.
SECOND
You don't chase a girl ever. You become an attracive man, you date other chicks, and then THEY chase you. I know that is hard to get, but yes, get to a certain level in terms of your peronsal growth and attitude and THEY do the chasing.
THIRD
She isn't flirting. Getting a new job is stressful for anyone, especially a girl. Don't read to much into her "staring" and "smiling". Just take it in stride and be cool. Give subtle hints that you are a cool guy who has fun, and has friends, and also dates other women. This is THE workplace plan.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
thederekeffect1
Master Don Juan
Excuse me for not laughing.
Here's my input:
First of all, I disagree with DJohnson with one thing. Considering that you both just got hired, and you're both the new people around the working environment, she has no reason to be staring at you. If she were only concentrating on her work, don't you think she'd be watching the more experienced workers?
Give it a few more days. Just to make sure. If you still have a good feeling about this, go ahead and ask her for her phone number OR ask her if she wants to do something after work (If you plan on dating a girl you work with, talk to her enough while you're at work, and things run smoothly you can actually skip the phone number stage at working environments and get that later). There is no harm in asking... You can't get fired for asking for a phone number or if they want to do something after work. But that's about as far as it can go.
Just be warned about the negatives to dating a girl you work with. If things don't run smoothly, it can cause trouble in the working environment that doesn't just effect you. It effects everyone you work with.
Here's my input:
First of all, I disagree with DJohnson with one thing. Considering that you both just got hired, and you're both the new people around the working environment, she has no reason to be staring at you. If she were only concentrating on her work, don't you think she'd be watching the more experienced workers?
Give it a few more days. Just to make sure. If you still have a good feeling about this, go ahead and ask her for her phone number OR ask her if she wants to do something after work (If you plan on dating a girl you work with, talk to her enough while you're at work, and things run smoothly you can actually skip the phone number stage at working environments and get that later). There is no harm in asking... You can't get fired for asking for a phone number or if they want to do something after work. But that's about as far as it can go.
Just be warned about the negatives to dating a girl you work with. If things don't run smoothly, it can cause trouble in the working environment that doesn't just effect you. It effects everyone you work with.