"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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This crazy hating manupilative friend

Upper

Don Juan
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This isn't really a dating question but a social one and I would love some advice.

I used to hang out with this guy but he lost my phone and wasn't in the least apologetic so I didn't hide my disgust and broke off contact with him.

I went on to meet new people, no big deal. But after awhile, I found my new friends behaving wierd when I'm around. It turned out that the guy got to know them, and eventually spread twisted and exaggerated tales about me.

I may not be everybody's best friend, but I get along well with people I meet. But this guy, he's like the male psycho stalker. He finds out what I'm up to from mutual contacts and he'll go out of the way to create trouble for me and my new found buddies.

Basically what happens is:
1 I meet new people
2 We get along fine.
3 He hooks up with them when I'm not around.
4 He has more free time than me and spends more time with them, builds up rapport etc
5 One day he tells them "Oh you know Upper too? Did you know he blah blah"
6 Next day I meet these people and they're awkward around me.


I've tried making up with him, and also fighting with him. Neither worked. I've also tried explaining to my friends what really happened between me and him and what a manupilative **** he is but it seems like I'm trying to qualify myself. So I move on and meet new people but he manages to do this to a few groups already.

What should I do? Do I really need to constantly avoid him or AMOG him? Should I just try and buy him some candy? :cheer:
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Hitman10000

Master Don Juan
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May 29, 2006
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Dude, stop hanging with this guy. I know these type of people and here's a name I have for them: Friend Stealer. Friend Stealers pretend to be yourself and when they meet your other friends they want your contact info, etc so they can be surrounded by your friends and have them turn on you slowly one by one.

The truth about Friend Stealers is that while they may be surrounded by people, the relationships are empty and superficial. Your use to them is an object to be manipulated/controlled. To tell you the truth about these people is that they're really lonely, I'm not talking about being happy being alone I'm talking about these persons rather not spend the time to know another person well but rather knowing they can be useful to them.
 

Upper

Don Juan
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Yeah I've seen a fair bit of life to know that bad people exist, and of course some of them have a sad story behind them but that's for another day.

The main problem though, is that I have already LEFT him.These days I try to avoid him but he has ways of catching up, he's this super skilled manipilator, the type you see in the movies. :cuss:
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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GloriouslyInsane

Master Don Juan
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May 7, 2006
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I don't believe anyone could be this obsessed and its quite illogical on HOW he finds out with whom you associate with.But if it's as bad as you make it sound,as much as i hate to advocate violence,it is the best solution.Remember,if violence isn't solving your problem,you're not using enough of it.
 
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