"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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This crazy hating manupilative friend

U

Upper

Don Juan
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This isn't really a dating question but a social one and I would love some advice.

I used to hang out with this guy but he lost my phone and wasn't in the least apologetic so I didn't hide my disgust and broke off contact with him.

I went on to meet new people, no big deal. But after awhile, I found my new friends behaving wierd when I'm around. It turned out that the guy got to know them, and eventually spread twisted and exaggerated tales about me.

I may not be everybody's best friend, but I get along well with people I meet. But this guy, he's like the male psycho stalker. He finds out what I'm up to from mutual contacts and he'll go out of the way to create trouble for me and my new found buddies.

Basically what happens is:
1 I meet new people
2 We get along fine.
3 He hooks up with them when I'm not around.
4 He has more free time than me and spends more time with them, builds up rapport etc
5 One day he tells them "Oh you know Upper too? Did you know he blah blah"
6 Next day I meet these people and they're awkward around me.


I've tried making up with him, and also fighting with him. Neither worked. I've also tried explaining to my friends what really happened between me and him and what a manupilative **** he is but it seems like I'm trying to qualify myself. So I move on and meet new people but he manages to do this to a few groups already.

What should I do? Do I really need to constantly avoid him or AMOG him? Should I just try and buy him some candy? :cheer:
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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H

Hitman10000

Master Don Juan
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Dude, stop hanging with this guy. I know these type of people and here's a name I have for them: Friend Stealer. Friend Stealers pretend to be yourself and when they meet your other friends they want your contact info, etc so they can be surrounded by your friends and have them turn on you slowly one by one.

The truth about Friend Stealers is that while they may be surrounded by people, the relationships are empty and superficial. Your use to them is an object to be manipulated/controlled. To tell you the truth about these people is that they're really lonely, I'm not talking about being happy being alone I'm talking about these persons rather not spend the time to know another person well but rather knowing they can be useful to them.
 
U

Upper

Don Juan
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Yeah I've seen a fair bit of life to know that bad people exist, and of course some of them have a sad story behind them but that's for another day.

The main problem though, is that I have already LEFT him.These days I try to avoid him but he has ways of catching up, he's this super skilled manipilator, the type you see in the movies. :cuss:
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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G

GloriouslyInsane

Master Don Juan
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I don't believe anyone could be this obsessed and its quite illogical on HOW he finds out with whom you associate with.But if it's as bad as you make it sound,as much as i hate to advocate violence,it is the best solution.Remember,if violence isn't solving your problem,you're not using enough of it.
 
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