Things I've done so far

[BergischerLöwe]

5 years bro.

Well technically it's about four years and one month. Still with the amount of time and effort it would take me to be able to cold approach successfully (we're talking years of hard effort here), I feel I have a greater chance at meeting women with dating apps than irl. That's why it sucks that the apps have gone downhill over the years. On paper, online dating is ideal for someone like me, but the demon business practices of dating app companies ruin the experience. Nothing has proven any better so far than swiping and hoping

 

[corrector]

Well technically it's about four years and one month. Still with the amount of time and effort it would take me to be able to cold approach successfully (we're talking years of hard effort here), I feel I have a greater chance at meeting women with dating apps than irl. That's why it sucks that the apps have gone downhill over the years. On paper, online dating is ideal for someone like me, but the demon business practices of dating app companies ruin the experience. Nothing has proven any better so far than swiping and hoping

With 4 years already gone, what do you have to lose? It does not sound like OLD works with you if that much time passed. If you dont meet anyone through cold approach in 4 years then its a tie. You should really incorporate both strategies.

 

[BergischerLöwe]

With 4 years already gone, what do you have to lose? It does not sound like OLD works with you if that much time passed. If you dont meet anyone through cold approach in 4 years then its a tie. You should really incorporate both strategies.

Well ideally I should incorporate both. But so far I haven't been able to get this approaching thing off the ground and given the time and difficulty required to learn it, even with the shortcomings of online dating I technically have a better chance meeting women online. It is indeed true that in this year, 2023, I haven't had any matches on apps turn into dates. In the years after the worst of the pandemic and before this year (2021-22), I've actually had several opportunities to end my dry spell but I never went thru with it for various reasons. Last year I was talking to this girl I met on apps who actually did like me a fair bit, and even though the wasn't the most attractive she was still cute and had a nice rack, and she was into the same kind of music as I am and everything. Even with this considered it didn't go that far in the end. I did in fact meet up with her once and we fooled around a bit, but even though I had an alright time I never ended up doing that again since she lived more than two hours away. Also she was a virgin and I was a bit apprehensive about that since I've been on a dry spell for so long and otherwise am relatively inexperienced sexually myself.

At one point in the summer of 2021, I was talking to three different girls from apps at around the same time. Each one of them stated with no ambiguity that the wanted to sleep with me, but still I never pursued that. Any one of them would have been pretty good but it never ended up happening since I let those convos fizz out. I guess I must've been nervous about the prospect of having sex or something like that. Nowadays, however, I'm not getting any matches on apps that could potentially lead to sex or a relationship. In 2023 none of my conversations with women on apps get anywhere. It sucks since I could have ended the dry spell in 2021 or '22 back when I could still have interactions with women on apps that could have potentially led to sex, but now there's nothing that can even lead to that.

 

[Gamisch]

Well ideally I should incorporate both. But so far I haven't been able to get this approaching thing off the ground and given the time and difficulty required to learn it, even with the shortcomings of online dating I technically have a better chance meeting women online. It is indeed true that in this year, 2023, I haven't had any matches on apps turn into dates. In the years after the worst of the pandemic and before this year (2021-22), I've actually had several opportunities to end my dry spell but I never went thru with it for various reasons. Last year I was talking to this girl I met on apps who actually did like me a fair bit, and even though the wasn't the most attractive she was still cute and had a nice rack, and she was into the same kind of music as I am and everything. Even with this considered it didn't go that far in the end. I did in fact meet up with her once and we fooled around a bit, but even though I had an alright time I never ended up doing that again since she lived more than two hours away. Also she was a virgin and I was a bit apprehensive about that since I've been on a dry spell for so long and otherwise am relatively inexperienced sexually myself.

At one point in the summer of 2021, I was talking to three different girls from apps at around the same time. Each one of them stated with no ambiguity that the wanted to sleep with me, but still I never pursued that. Any one of them would have been pretty good but it never ended up happening since I let those convos fizz out. I guess I must've been nervous about the prospect of having sex or something like that. Nowadays, however, I'm not getting any matches on apps that could potentially lead to sex or a relationship. In 2023 none of my conversations with women on apps get anywhere. It sucks since I could have ended the dry spell in 2021 or '22 back when I could still have interactions with women on apps that could have potentially led to sex, but now there's nothing that can even lead to that.

I have to say, your honesty keeps you getting my sympathy.

You have to realize that the experience from '21 will NEVER be the same . The apps are redesigned, and more importantly the MINDS of the women who're using them are fried by now. Again we had a damn SURGEON getting ZERO matches. Who had pictures in his doctor outfit everything...

@All_Kindz_Of_Gainz gave you the right answer; step AWAY from the game for a year. Dont necessarily leave the forum
But adjust your expectations TODAY. Expect ZERO women in 2024. Focus on getting your life together, on therapeutic tasks and feck a hooker to empty your balls. There are (b)MILLIONS of women selling their bodies, hb9,s women who'd never ever would be in your league right now for lets say a 100. That's two simp dates where you pay a 50 bill and as @SW15 always say,these dates will end up in " NSN2D "( no sex no 2nd date)

I know some posters don't like this advice but idga**** . Your little ego game doesn't bring you anything, meanwhile hb9 sucks of either a 70 year old man via her "work" or a 35 year old Tyrone who "cold approached her". And here you are crying that women don't "love " you LOL. Go empty your sack, man up and focus on what needs t0 be done.

Meanwhile you still dont have a job huh?

edit. @BergischerLöwe reread and repost my qoute completely please, i pressedsave accidentally before I was finished.

 

[BergischerLöwe]

I have to say, your honesty keeps you getting my sympathy.

You have to realize that the experience from '21 will NEVER be the same . The apps are redesigned, and more importantly the MINDS of the women who're using them is fried by now.

@al

I know it'll never be the same. I still am really kicking myself in the head about those missed opportunities. I still don't know what to do since I've relied on apps for so long. I have a hunch that there's a fair amount of guys in my situation, guys who only really learned to meet women from apps. Solving this problem is a completely different matter. The way it stands now it seems like I'll have to grind and grind just to get to a point where maybe in a few years I may hypothetically be able to meet women easily irl. But that seems so daunting and far away. I think I've backed myself too far into a corner. Even if I met a girl somehow and had the opportunity to hook up with her in earnest, I haven't had any sex in so long that it would be nerve wracking for me. It's been too long and now it's weird.

 

[BergischerLöwe]

gave you the right answer; step AWAY from the game for a year. Dont necessarily leave the forum
But adjust your expectations TODAY. Expect ZERO women in 2024. Focus on getting your life together, on therapeutic tasks and feck a hooker to empty your balls. There are (b)MILLIONS of women selling their bodies, hb9,s women who'd never ever would be in your league right now for lets say a 100. That's two simp dates where you pay a 50 bill and as @SW15 always say,these dates will end up in " NSN2D "( no sex no 2nd date)

I'm not expecting to meet any women in '24 anyway. From the way my experience in the dating game has been in the past few years, there's no way I'm getting my hopes up. I'll focus on getting my life together in the meantime but hookers are illegal where I live and I have religious objections to using their services anyway. But regardless I think having to pay for sex would make me feel worse. Is there anything I can do to help me cope with not meeting any women for yet another year when I don't meet any in '24?

And no I still have no job, still figuring that out

 

[BergischerLöwe]

Another odd development in the past eight weeks or so is that now I've found myself texting a woman I went to high school with and the whole situation is very random. It all started after we happened to run into each other by chance at a college football game back in September, since that happened I've been texting her on an off and for some reason she actually replies. The funny thing is that I never hung out with her back in high school, I hadn't seen her in nearly 10 years until we ran into each other at the game, and she's not the kind of girl that has much in common with me at all, but for some reason she keeps talking to me and replying to my texts. I don't know how serious of a lead this is since there's been no flirting going on so far in these text conversations, but still it's kinda remarkable that we keep talking even though we never knew each other that well back in the day and we don't have much in common besides the fact that we knew each other in school. Despite the unlikeliness of it all, in the past couple months she's actually the woman I've talked to the most. In any case I'm not sure how to play this. She's plenty attractive and I know she's at least single, but idk if she's looking and overall I consider the prospect of landing a date with this particular woman to be unlikely, especially since I don't have much in common with her. But still I keep finding myself talking to her via text every so often, and like I said she actually replies. Not really sure how much of an IOI this is if at all.

 

[SW15]

Ask her to meet you for a drink. Escalate. Insert your penis into her vagina.

 

[BadBoy89]

Ask her to meet you for a drink. Escalate. Insert your penis into her vagina.

The answer to any problem, any guy has, with any girl, in any situation, is…”Go to the gym,”

Haven't slept with a girl in a long time? The gym
Don't know how to attract girls? The gym
She is not returning calls? The gym
She is seeing other guys? The gym
She is being difficult? The gym
She broke up with you? The gym

The solution to all girl problems is in the gym.

 

[SW15]

The solution to all girl problems is in the gym.

I don't know if that's the only solution but it's a part of every solution.

Also, there are valid forms of exercise besides the gym.

 

[BergischerLöwe]

Ask her to meet you for a drink. Escalate. Insert your penis into her vagina.

That is indeed an option but I feel like I need to gauge her interest level a bit more before pulling the trigger. Like I said I haven't been flirting with her or nothing yet

 

[BergischerLöwe]

The answer to any problem, any guy has, with any girl, in any situation, is…”Go to the gym,”

Haven't slept with a girl in a long time? The gym
Don't know how to attract girls? The gym
She is not returning calls? The gym
She is seeing other guys? The gym
She is being difficult? The gym
She broke up with you? The gym

The solution to all girl problems is in the gym.

Well at the very least I've been trying to get my power clean up to 100 kg

 

[Pierce.Manhammer]

A 50kg powerclean is a big step, for a beginner, you’re telling me you’re close to 100kg?

Well at the very least I've been trying to get my power clean up to 100 kg

 

[BergischerLöwe]

A 50kg powerclean is a big step, for a beginner, you’re telling me you’re close to 100kg?

Well I'm not exactly a beginner doing the olympic lifts but on a good day I could probably clean like 85 or 90 kg for a heavy single. My numbers in the clean are still lower than what I'd prefer them to be. I can snatch around 65-70 kg for a single

 

[BergischerLöwe]

Another thing is that over the past few weeks I've gotten very few matches on tinder, but on facebook dating I've gotten quite a few. The women I've matched with on facebook dating seem like they'd be compatible with me for the most part since most of them are into similiar things that I am, but they're all so far away that I can't really do anything to pursue them in earnest. That's another thing that's maddening with online dating. Even though there are women on dating sites that would be more compatible with me, they're all on the other side of the county so I can't even pursue that. It sucks. It's like there's no women locally on dating sites/apps that would be more compatible with me, the women that are more compatible are all so damn far away.