"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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They'll talk about their dating life, but...

Leashed

Don Juan
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Had a short fling with a girl a few years back before she left overseas for work. We had crazy strong chemistry then, but decided with her job there was really no point of keeping much contact because it'd be best to move on and find somebody else.

She recently got back, and nothing's changed. Still an awesome girl, we still click, and we still have fun together.

Getting to the point here, we've both had our share of relationships in the last few years. She'll openly and at times excessively talk about hers, but not want to hear a word about any of mine. I've got a vague idea of what this means, but looking for some clarification/validation, and wondering what you guys think.

She's gone again at the end of the summer, which sucks, but I kinda prefer random hookups haha. Less draining on the emotional side.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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IBreatheSpears

Senior Don Juan
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I'd guess talking about her relationships is ****-testing to see if you'll be an emotional tampon for her. Not wanting to hear about yours maybe means she's a bit jealous. What do you think?
 

Willard

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My last girlfriend would talk about her previous relationships, I told her I don't like hearing about them, I didn't want to imagine her with anyone else. She said sorry and didn't bring them up again. A couple of times after I would talk about an ex she would say we have an agreement about not talking about it, So I stopped. Problem solved. The girl I'm seeing now, doesn't talk about her exes at all, and I don't ask, she asked about my last girlfriend, I told her about her, she even asked to see a picture of her, I showed her a pic of us together, she said I looked cute, nothing about the girl. I'm kind of glad she asked to see a pic, because even though the current girl is a lot more attractive the ex is still very attractive, I think she knows I only date attractive women now.
 

Leashed

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I totally agree that past relationships should stay in the past within a settled relationship. What makes it tricky is the fact we're not exclusively in one together. Obviously feelings and the hope for the chance for it is there, but it isn't feasible.

I'll mostly bring things up after she brings her history up to gauge her reaction.

I personally think it's a test, to see if she can rattle me, it doesn't work, but it seems like she gets easily rattled with hearing my experiences.
 

Bokanovsky

Master Don Juan
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Leashed said:
Getting to the point here, we've both had our share of relationships in the last few years. She'll openly and at times excessively talk about hers, but not want to hear a word about any of mine. I've got a vague idea of what this means, but looking for some clarification/validation, and wondering what you guys think.
You instinct is correct. She does not want a relationship with you.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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nismo-4

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Your princess is in another castle. But she doesn't mind the attention you give her.

Case closed.
 

VladPatton

Master Don Juan
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I'm on Bokanovsky and nismo's wavelength. Why the fück are you even hanging with this girl if you ain't bustin nuts in her??? So you can her about how other guys banged her? How she liked swallowing loads from her last bf? Come on, man. All this cὀckteasing and she'll leave in a few months. What's in it for you? Are you just content that a cute girl is giving you the time of day? She gives such niceness to waiters and bank tellers, too.

This, at best, is a complete time waster for you.

I hope you'll see the light on this soon.
 

Leashed

Don Juan
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I've been fvcking her. Plenty and often. Trust me, I wouldn't be around if I wasn't.
 

Leashed

Don Juan
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Leashed said:
Still an awesome girl, we still click, and we still have fun together.
Next time I'll be a little clearer on the 'have fun' part, didn't think you guys would misconstrue that with playing checkers or doing crosswords together.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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