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They wanna buy me a new apartment...

BeExcellent

Master Don Juan
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You are doing the right thing and you are escaping their manipulation and control. The offer of the apartment is to enslave and control you.

You are the Black Sheep to them. Embrace it. Your sister will be the golden child. She cannot see how they are because they do not show the ugly control side to her the way they show you. Perhaps your mom can see but she is too comfortable or afraid to fight about it. You must make peace with all this, be a man and go forward.

That is what a man does. Love yourself. You are brave and strong and able to leave the situation. Do not sell out. Move forward and be your own man. Life might seem hard, but you will make your own way as a man and you will have self respect.

We are here and we are pulling for you and will encourage you.

Work out, find work, embrace your life. Do not allow yourself to be imprisoned. Not by your father or anyone.

Salud & good luck
 

Blacksheep

Master Don Juan
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You are doing the right thing and you are escaping their manipulation and control. The offer of the apartment is to enslave and control you.

You are the Black Sheep to them. Embrace it. Your sister will be the golden child. She cannot see how they are because they do not show the ugly control side to her the way they show you. Perhaps your mom can see but she is too comfortable or afraid to fight about it. You must make peace with all this, be a man and go forward.

That is what a man does. Love yourself. You are brave and strong and able to leave the situation. Do not sell out. Move forward and be your own man. Life might seem hard, but you will make your own way as a man and you will have self respect.

We are here and we are pulling for you and will encourage you.

Work out, find work, embrace your life. Do not allow yourself to be imprisoned. Not by your father or anyone.

Salud & good luck
Thanks for those words man!

I'm really happy to be able to get out of all those situations, it was 29 years living under that abuse. Everyday it seems that it gets better, also my eyes are opening and I'm understanding a lot of things. Like flashs from my childhood and this is proving that it was always like that as my therapist said. The difference is that as I started to confront him, those attack got worse and the strategies changed.

I'm just affraid about making money. I'm feeling lost with that and sometimes I feel imature as I lived on this bubble. I worked for his company and I know I have experience, but it's different in some way. I have some thoughts of fear of losing my money and not being able to have success on my business or don't find a job. It scares me a bit.
 

mrgoodstuff

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Thanks for those words man!

I'm really happy to be able to get out of all those situations, it was 29 years living under that abuse. Everyday it seems that it gets better, also my eyes are opening and I'm understanding a lot of things. Like flashs from my childhood and this is proving that it was always like that as my therapist said. The difference is that as I started to confront him, those attack got worse and the strategies changed.

I'm just affraid about making money. I'm feeling lost with that and sometimes I feel imature as I lived on this bubble. I worked for his company and I know I have experience, but it's different in some way. I have some thoughts of fear of losing my money and not being able to have success on my business or don't find a job. It scares me a bit.
Make it thru this. Get rid of that "if" bs. You WILL be able to financially take care of yourself. And you will excel in all of your goals and desires.

 

Blacksheep

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Make it thru this. Get rid of that "if" bs. You WILL be able to financially take care of yourself. And you will excel in all of your goals and desires.

That's true! Just watched that video, it's amazing! And also subscribed to that channel... Some pretty good info there!

Thanks! =)
 

ShePays

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After I left the house my dad owned and also quit my job on his company, now they are telling that they will donate me a apartment.

But, as I know my dad never do anything without a price, it seems like a move to benefit him in some way.

They are desperately trying to persuade me to accept that offer and buy the most quickly they can. But, I know what was his defamation game and everything he did.

It seems he wants to rebuild his image to society or use that against me like. Look how great we are as parents, we bought him a new place... We are perfect parents.

Or as they can't come here in that place I live now, they might use that to know where I live and to use that as a excuse for blackmailing me as they used to do on their company and in the house I lived.

For a time I think that it could be a good thing, but this is like a dirty money that comes from someone that just want to keep his control over people.

Some guys here followed my last posts about that. Would like to hear some opinions about.
If your relationship with your parents is really that bad, don't accept anything from them. You shouldn't accept anything from anyone who'll lord it over you, anyway, regardless of your relationship with them. Stand on your own.
 

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Blacksheep

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If your relationship with your parents is really that bad, don't accept anything from them. You shouldn't accept anything from anyone who'll lord it over you, anyway, regardless of your relationship with them. Stand on your own.
That's right.

I just reject that offer... on a polite way. Just say thanks but I did not want that, I will achieve those things with my own money. And appreciated that.

Then he did what he like to do... said to my family that I'm a very difficult person, he put 5 real state agents to show me those apartments and I just refused it.

Yes, I'm difficult. I do not sell my soul.
 

mrgoodstuff

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That's right.

I just reject that offer... on a polite way. Just say thanks but I did not want that, I will achieve those things with my own money. And appreciated that.

Then he did what he like to do... said to my family that I'm a very difficult person, he put 5 real state agents to show me those apartments and I just refused it.

Yes, I'm difficult. I do not sell my soul.
They shouldn't know where yoi live.
 

Blacksheep

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They shouldn't know where yoi live.
Yep. They know the neighborhood I live but they don't know which apartment I am.

If I accepted that, they would exactly know where I live, since they gave it to me. Then, probably they would use that as a excuse to contact me.
 

mrgoodstuff

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Yep. They know the neighborhood I live but they don't know which apartment I am.

If I accepted that, they would exactly know where I live, since they gave it to me. Then, probably they would use that as a excuse to contact me.
You need to move again. They shouldn't even know your neighborhood.
 

Blacksheep

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You need to move again. They shouldn't even know your neighborhood.
I'm really thinking about that. Just giving me some time to put things in place.

But mainly, I would like to find another city and move. Somewhere calm and small.

What could be the risks of them knowing the neighborhood I live?

They are very silent those last 2/3 weeks after I refused that apartment offer. It smells like trying to find a new way to hit on me.
 

mrgoodstuff

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I'm really thinking about that. Just giving me some time to put things in place.

But mainly, I would like to find another city and move. Somewhere calm and small.

What could be the risks of them knowing the neighborhood I live?

They are very silent those last 2/3 weeks after I refused that apartment offer. It smells like trying to find a new way to hit on me.
FInd your new place and move without saying a word. New City makes 100% sense.
 

Blacksheep

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You might need to change your name bro... For peace of mind. You don't have to tell anyone, but legally your name will be what it is so they won't be able to search you.
I made a quick search here... In Brazil is a bit difficult and seems to be not possible to change name.

On the worst moments I've thought about disappearing... The only way should be to get a new fake ID, leave this country and change even my own face and looking.

But that is an extreme solution. Also I have my son here, I couldn't just leave him. Even knowing that my dad is doing everything to put sh1t into his mind and if he believes in that my relationship with him is gone.

Moving to another town is something viable. They still can try to reach me but it will be more difficult.
 

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mrgoodstuff

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I made a quick search here... In Brazil is a bit difficult and seems to be not possible to change name.

On the worst moments I've thought about disappearing... The only way should be to get a new fake ID, leave this country and change even my own face and looking.

But that is an extreme solution. Also I have my son here, I couldn't just leave him. Even knowing that my dad is doing everything to put sh1t into his mind and if he believes in that my relationship with him is gone.

Moving to another town is something viable. They still can try to reach me but it will be more difficult.
Over the years if they can't get to you eventually they'll lose interest. Start to grow and hustle to build your $$ so you never worry about depending on Any one
 

Black Widow Void

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Hello friend - Transitions can have their share of bumps and while your recent change may not seem to offer you the past 'comforts'... you still recently won the "lottery." Do you remember responding with how much better you felt when you initially made this transition?

The moment that you accept an apartment offer from your father, you've basically 'communicated' that your independence is up for sale and he (your father) has negotiated the closing price. Don't do it.

I take it that you're a little down on your luck at the moment.
If you think that life with your father was bad before... imagine the 'power' he will demonstrate now.
Unlike before, you moved away and and with this move, you also took his power away.
The moment you appear vulnerable enough to depend on him, he can (and probably will) exploit this to his advantage...
If you thought that you felt powerless before... I suspect that if you return your power to him, you'll eventually feel worse than ever.
 

mrgoodstuff

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Hello friend - Transitions can have their share of bumps and while your recent change may not seem to offer you the past 'comforts'... you still recently won the "lottery." Do you remember responding with how much better you felt when you initially made this transition?

The moment that you accept an apartment offer from your father, you've basically 'communicated' that your independence is up for sale and he (your father) has negotiated the closing price. Don't do it.

I take it that you're a little down on your luck at the moment.
If you think that life with your father was bad before... imagine the 'power' he will demonstrate now.
Unlike before, you moved away and and with this move, you also took his power away.
The moment you appear vulnerable enough to depend on him, he can (and probably will) exploit this to his advantage...
If you thought that you felt powerless before... I suspect that if you return your power to him, you'll eventually feel worse than ever.
So their "power" was in controlling him? Forcing him to comply with their viewpoint?
 

death_wish. .

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So their "power" was in controlling him? Forcing him to comply with their viewpoint?
not only the viewpoint but another way of validating and proving the viewpoint to be true


its like an older brother who's been told to praise the younger one all his life the trance is like being brainwashed imagin lookin at a grown man and snapping in attempt to wake him up.

the hardest thing about changing or moving on is that ppl dont want you to do it so they will do anything for you to stay in a mental space that is familiar , growth is stressing and being uncomfortable (i.e stepping outside the comfort(familiar) zone)
 

mrgoodstuff

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not only the viewpoint but another way of validating and proving the viewpoint to be true


its like an older brother who's been told to praise the younger one all his life the trance is like being brainwashed imagin lookin at a grown man and snapping in attempt to wake him up.

the hardest thing about changing or moving on is that ppl dont want you to do it so they will do anything for you to stay in a mental space that is familiar , growth is stressing and being uncomfortable (i.e stepping outside the comfort(familiar) zone)
That mental space they keep you trapped in allows them to feel "better"

Your growth is stressing for THEM not you. Because they want you to remain in position.
 
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