"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

The waittress dillema

TL79

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 25, 2010
Messages
15
Reaction score
2
Is it cool to slip my number to the same waittress that my cousin tried to but failed?

I wasn't with him at the time but she wasn't interested, my family was though. Today I went back to that same place with my mom for breakfast and she was helping us, my mom jokingly apologized to her about my cousin giving her his number, she said "Ah, he meant well though", lol. My cousin is about 3 years older than me(33) but he comes off as kind of immature, she actually thought he was much younger than what he was. She was definitely cute so I introduced myself to her, asked her name. We would make small talk and she made several efforts to keep pouring me coffee even after I took a few sips and my cup was still relatively full. Everytime she would stop what she was doing and talk to me for a little bit.

She wasn't interested in my cousin but I think she could've been in me. Would it be alright to slip her my number the next time I'm there, or could it cause friction if we do get together and he sees me with her? I'm thinking go for it because she never did call him but at the same time that's family and there are plenty of girls out there.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

Master Cheif

Don Juan
Joined
May 19, 2010
Messages
31
Reaction score
0
i work in a restaurant and i will say this, if you do do that, you should be really sure she likes you and is not just being wicked nice to get extra tips, because they will often take it, take your money then laugh at you.

then they bring the numbers to me in the kitchen when im doing the dishes and show them to me and they laugh, i think its mean but thats just me.

but then again, if your gut says go for it, i would
 

Kal0051

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 24, 2009
Messages
964
Reaction score
7
she's a hired gun. Waitresses will talk to you, flirt with you, pretend to like you because that's their job. They want you to stay, be comfortable, and spend money (not only does this make them look good to management but it drives your bill up which increases the tip you give them). Why isn't this common knowledge, there's a reason that bars like to have women servers, because guys buy more from them.
 

Master Cheif

Don Juan
Joined
May 19, 2010
Messages
31
Reaction score
0
Kal0051 said:
she's a hired gun. Waitresses will talk to you, flirt with you, pretend to like you because that's their job. They want you to stay, be comfortable, and spend money (not only does this make them look good to management but it drives your bill up which increases the tip you give them). Why isn't this common knowledge, there's a reason that bars like to have women servers, because guys buy more from them.
the restaurant i worked at has never had a male server, ever
 

nismo-4

Moderator
Joined
Jan 31, 2005
Messages
4,438
Reaction score
1,142
Location
From New Orleans, Louisiana to Atlanta, Georgia!!!
Kal0051 said:
she's a hired gun. Waitresses will talk to you, flirt with you, pretend to like you because that's their job. They want you to stay, be comfortable, and spend money (not only does this make them look good to management but it drives your bill up which increases the tip you give them). Why isn't this common knowledge, there's a reason that bars like to have women servers, because guys buy more from them.
Same thing with strippers and female bank tellers, car dealers, administrative/ dental assistants, etc. This is one reason why women worry about their looks so much. They make the company look better and they know men who enter want to try and holla at them. So they're ready with the attention wh0re facade and b**ch shields and IHAB. If you do get their #, they may flake unless you really stood out. Women know how to be d**kteases, and they'll do it!

Why the hell do you think Hooters' girls and other waitresses show a more cleavage than normal? And in restaurants, most of the guys are hidden in the back of the house, cooking. I was one of them. Cooks who work in the restaurant have a slight advantage (Key word) over the male customers who try to pay for play but they pay for plate and pray for play!

I make no apologies for that tongue twister, but the point is, some guys may luck out and get the hookup, but hired guns are called that so they can free your wallet and shoot it, so the money bleeds out. Who gets chosen, you or your money? Disarm their game if allowed to do so.

Getting a # can be an ego boost but in reality, useless! Unless you call and make a move, because there are about 13 other guys from that same day, not including those from the previous week and her time spent in the club or whatever. That makes the girl have hella options. Call or no call, she don't give a f**k! She gets male attention daily!
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

Kailex

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 3, 2010
Messages
2,072
Reaction score
190
Location
New Jersey
TL79 said:
Is it cool to slip my number to the same waittress that my cousin tried to but failed?
Your whole OP is full of fail.
Slip your number? What makes you think you are going to fail any differently?

All these threads about "gaming" female bartenders/waitresses are laughable at best.

If you really are interested in her, then stop taking the easy way out. ASK for her number. Don't slip her your number. Do that in a week you'll be posting about how she was throwing out IOI's like crazy but hasn't called you and whether you should go back to the restaurant to see what's up.

I'd much rather spend time somewhere else gaming than a "server" expecting monetary tips.
 

Kal0051

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 24, 2009
Messages
964
Reaction score
7
nismo-4 said:
And in restaurants, most of the guys are hidden in the back of the house, cooking.
yep, most restaurants will only use the best looking, most presentable guys in the front of house (I'm one of those guys, but I've also been to some places that only have women in certain parts of the restaurant). But almost all the guys are only allowed in the kitchen.
 

brekke

Don Juan
Joined
May 9, 2010
Messages
101
Reaction score
2
You can tell if they like you by if they give you free food. They will also act stupid, nervous, and be flirting, just like in real life.
 
Top