CaliMike
Don Juan
Bump
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Thank me for reading this post again. My kino skill is too much out of practice.Character posted 12-02-2001
I never used kino or wasn't really flirtatious, so even if I wanted to be people would be thinkin, "Why is Character touching her?", so I always shyed away from it.
In order for me to end this way of thinking I needed to slightly change my rep. This means being touchy-feely with the girls regardless of whether you are interested in them, so when you do want to use kino on the girl you're interested in you won't feel weird about it. When in convo with any girl USE KINO! Any girl, best friends, random friends, you're momma, grandma, etc... Just do it! While talking with em touch em, when you're in a playful mood, tease them and they will reciprocate and maybe lightly hit you, then you can just do the same back and it will continue for a lil while in a playful manner, when you go to sit down and talk to em sit right near em and don't be afriad to sit too close (just don't over do it). Just practice alot.
Try not to limit the kino to just a few girls but most of your friends. Also when you see a girl friend of yours enter a party or gathering or whatever give them a welcome hug. When they leave, give them a good-bye hug. Don't forget to do this with all the girls so that it's expected of you and it wouldn't seem weird at all. You will be experienced with kino and the girls will love your touch.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
"putting little pieces of trash in her back pocket (seriously!)"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.