flows101
Don Juan
Amazing Post
*FIVE STARS* I LOVE THIS POST, AMAZING
*FIVE STARS* I LOVE THIS POST, AMAZING
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
The Traps of Life
- Thread starter VIVAlasVEGASBaby
- Start date
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
I love Hyori Lee
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Mar 23, 2006
- Messages
- 305
- Reaction score
- 2
Bumped this so that guys from LS can read our better posts.
VIVAlasVEGASBaby
Senior Don Juan
Well it’s been a while since I’ve been around the site and I finally decided to retake a look at what I wrote seemingly so long ago. I’ve changed quite a bit since I originally wrote this post and I can say there are a few things I wrote back then that I have since forgotten. While reading this post I found myself asking “how did you know more then than you do now?” But I guess forgetting most of my own advice and refalling into many of these traps has given me a new appreciation for my own advice and foresight. Mistakes have a funny way of making us stronger…
If there’s anything I’ve learned these past few years it’s that, above all else, trust yourself. NEVER lose faith in yourself. Life will sting from time to time; how you manage that simple fact is what will make the difference. Most of what we learn in life about ourselves and others almost always comes from the rougher patches in life. I wrote this originally holding the idea that pain could be eliminated from our lives. What I now see is that life is really about learning from and growing from our pain. You’ll always encounter rough patches; how you deal with them and bounce back is what will define you as a person.
So for anyone out there going through troubles I encourage you to not necessarily fight the pain… Accept it. Learn from it. Grow from it. Understand that it will pass. Keep your chin up no matter what life throws at you. Look back to your past victories and smile. Look back to your past failures and what you learned from them and smile. Never let a setback or a loss keep you down…
Thanks again for all the praise for this post. Putting all these thoughts into words has certainly helped me and I’m glad it has helped others as well.
If there’s anything I’ve learned these past few years it’s that, above all else, trust yourself. NEVER lose faith in yourself. Life will sting from time to time; how you manage that simple fact is what will make the difference. Most of what we learn in life about ourselves and others almost always comes from the rougher patches in life. I wrote this originally holding the idea that pain could be eliminated from our lives. What I now see is that life is really about learning from and growing from our pain. You’ll always encounter rough patches; how you deal with them and bounce back is what will define you as a person.
So for anyone out there going through troubles I encourage you to not necessarily fight the pain… Accept it. Learn from it. Grow from it. Understand that it will pass. Keep your chin up no matter what life throws at you. Look back to your past victories and smile. Look back to your past failures and what you learned from them and smile. Never let a setback or a loss keep you down…
Thanks again for all the praise for this post. Putting all these thoughts into words has certainly helped me and I’m glad it has helped others as well.
TheHumanist
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Feb 4, 2007
- Messages
- 380
- Reaction score
- 13
If your age is correct, since you wrote that in 2003, that means you wrote that when you were 14. That is very impress, wise beyond the years. Even though you have refallen into since then and found that sometimes falling back in is part of the process of building character, that still a very good read and still something to take heed of when trying to remember to never stay too long in the many traps of life.
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
CosMoenTropic
Don Juan
- Joined
- Sep 6, 2008
- Messages
- 33
- Reaction score
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Good Post. You seem enlightened. I agree with a lot of the points.
You must have gone through some rough experiences to be able to get to this point in life when you realize all these things.
You must have gone through some rough experiences to be able to get to this point in life when you realize all these things.
The Dreamer
Don Juan
You've got it all right man, and it's one of the best posts out there.
Actually my experience is very similar to yours. I got a sort of illumination at 14, then I fell successively into all the traps I've always said I'd never fall into and now I'm learning all the lessons of the past and everything seems so clear right now. It has been reinforced by experience and at the moment I'm writing nothing could break it.
I think this post is a must read so I send it to the top
Live !
Actually my experience is very similar to yours. I got a sort of illumination at 14, then I fell successively into all the traps I've always said I'd never fall into and now I'm learning all the lessons of the past and everything seems so clear right now. It has been reinforced by experience and at the moment I'm writing nothing could break it.
I think this post is a must read so I send it to the top
Live !
alphamailman
Don Juan
- Joined
- Aug 5, 2008
- Messages
- 170
- Reaction score
- 6
- Age
- 43
The trapmaster enjoys this thread!!
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Deadly_Ripped
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Sep 29, 2003
- Messages
- 621
- Reaction score
- 26
Can we add another trap?
I propose we add the parent trap: A child zaps your money, your time, and your mental health, unless you're happily living with a significant other who values the child as their own (even if he/she is not).
Really enjoyed the post.
I propose we add the parent trap: A child zaps your money, your time, and your mental health, unless you're happily living with a significant other who values the child as their own (even if he/she is not).
Really enjoyed the post.
Night-hawk
Master Don Juan
Bump
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
PlayHer Man
Banned
All the "traps" can really be summed up as living like an animal. And I don't mean this in a bad way:
Animals don't spend their lives "trying to be happy" or "calculating every decision" they simply LIVE and do what comes natural. Animals do not get depressed because they are not introspective. They don't worry about the past or the future. They are not concerned about social contracts, debts or if they are "good".
Obviously we can't live like animals, nor should we. But we can learn to stop buying into all the shallow crap society tries to enforce. We can stop competing with others and being envious. We can learn to enjoy the moment and go after what we desire without apology, fear or explanation.
I don't totally agree with:
Totally ignoring the future (tomorrow) can lead you into making foolish and ignorant decisions TODAY... like cursing out your boss or drinking all night when you have work the next day... or having sex without a condom.
Animals don't spend their lives "trying to be happy" or "calculating every decision" they simply LIVE and do what comes natural. Animals do not get depressed because they are not introspective. They don't worry about the past or the future. They are not concerned about social contracts, debts or if they are "good".
Obviously we can't live like animals, nor should we. But we can learn to stop buying into all the shallow crap society tries to enforce. We can stop competing with others and being envious. We can learn to enjoy the moment and go after what we desire without apology, fear or explanation.
I don't totally agree with:
You DO need to think about the future and plan for it to some degree. Just don't become too committed to it. Stay adaptable and know that your plans for the future my never happen. Don't make your "dream" the only reason you get up in the morning and your only purpose in life. It many never come.. just like tomorrow my never come.
Totally ignoring the future (tomorrow) can lead you into making foolish and ignorant decisions TODAY... like cursing out your boss or drinking all night when you have work the next day... or having sex without a condom.
while young, and not a dad or father, you have time and money with which tolearn martial arts and defensive shooting. do so, and it will give you much discipline, confidence about other people, and a way to make a bit of money, anywhere you go, if you become adequately knowledeable and skilled at those things. u can make 20k a year, untaxed, no ss CASH, casting bullets and selling reloaded ammo, in less than 20 hours per week. ditto as much teaching of karate. in this economy having such sideline bizes can make all the difference in how you enjoy your life.