This information can be used to help you identify any kind of abuser and also to make sure you never become one. A professional Offender Counselor gave a lecture in one of my college classes on Thursday and I thought it was very interesting. This process is universal with any kind of abuser...be it a substance abuser, verbal abuser, physical abuser, rapist, child molester, etc..
1) Victim - the person views himself or herself as being a victim of society, blaming others for what goes wrong in your life.
2) Sense of Entitlement - the person thinks they deserve whatever they want without ever having to work for it and are lacking in personal responsibility.
3) Acting Out - the person abuses himself/herself or someone else either verbally, physically, sexually, etc.
4) Justification - the abuser justifies and makes excuses for their behavior. For example, "She/he asked for it. Who do they think they are anyway?" or "I just had a few drinks...everyone else was drinking. I couldn't be the only one not to drink."
A person who goes through this kind of thought process has the capacity to abuse...whether it be substances (self abuse) or abuse of someone else. This is why I am always talking about the dangers of viewing yourself as a victim and blaming others instead of taking responsibility for the part you play in your own problems and misfortunes in life. Anyone who views themselves as a victim in life and also has a sense of entitlement is at risk for becoming an abuser of himself/herself or others. Sometimes people are victims of abuse, but it is crucial to view yourself as a survivor and not a victim. That is the first step in avoiding becoming the kind of person you don't want to be.
This thread is intended to help men here identify abusive women as well as identify any unhealthy thought processes within themselves.
1) Victim - the person views himself or herself as being a victim of society, blaming others for what goes wrong in your life.
2) Sense of Entitlement - the person thinks they deserve whatever they want without ever having to work for it and are lacking in personal responsibility.
3) Acting Out - the person abuses himself/herself or someone else either verbally, physically, sexually, etc.
4) Justification - the abuser justifies and makes excuses for their behavior. For example, "She/he asked for it. Who do they think they are anyway?" or "I just had a few drinks...everyone else was drinking. I couldn't be the only one not to drink."
A person who goes through this kind of thought process has the capacity to abuse...whether it be substances (self abuse) or abuse of someone else. This is why I am always talking about the dangers of viewing yourself as a victim and blaming others instead of taking responsibility for the part you play in your own problems and misfortunes in life. Anyone who views themselves as a victim in life and also has a sense of entitlement is at risk for becoming an abuser of himself/herself or others. Sometimes people are victims of abuse, but it is crucial to view yourself as a survivor and not a victim. That is the first step in avoiding becoming the kind of person you don't want to be.
This thread is intended to help men here identify abusive women as well as identify any unhealthy thought processes within themselves.
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