I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
theguy351 said:worst response I have ever read on this entire site. Completely, 180 degrees away from the actual situation. Everyone who read that, now feels dumber. So you are incorrect, and my god have mercy on your soul.
theguy351 said:where can an 18 yr old, home for the summer meet chicks then? its almost impossible. i cant go to bars, clubs, and ****. everyone hangs out with their set friends anyway.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
yea thanks thats some insightful stuff right there. thats normally how i am at college and stuff, but it was weird coming home for the summer cause i go from having girls everywhere to not so much.Pimp-sicle said:Your mentality is negative and weak. No wonder you were so stuck on this chick. There aren't any under age clubs in your area? I see TONS of hot girls at:
-the gym
-the grocery store
-book store
-down town area
-restaurants
-malls
The point is when you have a handful of girls at your disposal you never fall victim to the scarcity mentality. Meaning, you'll never place an incredibly high importance on any one chick when you have 4 others to turn to. If one girl can't hang out, I'm sure one of the other 4 will be able to. This not only keeps you geninuely busy (Don Juan 101) but also keeps you from becoming too emotionally invested in one chick too soon. It also (most importantly) makes a high quality, relationship material type chick stand out from the bunch.
You need to get rid of your inner fear. Don't have your brother get girls #'s for you, that's weak (I realize this is probably a rare occurance, but still). Girls want the guy who has a busy life, who's always doing something exciting and most importantly is is taking care of his $hit!! You also can't complain if you don't make an effort. If your not out there talking to girls everyday, how do you expect to attract any? I bet you right now, there are a few girls who jock you and you don't even know it because you haven't picked up on their non-verbal signs of attraction.
PS: Drop this chick, she will only use you to stroke her ego now, meaning she might call you every once in a while, but she'll still pull the "busy" card and if she does hang out with you she won't give you anything....
PIMP
Pimp-sicle said:Your mentality is negative and weak. No wonder you were so stuck on this chick. There aren't any under age clubs in your area? I see TONS of hot girls at:
-the gym
-the grocery store
-book store
-down town area
-restaurants
-malls
The point is when you have a handful of girls at your disposal you never fall victim to the scarcity mentality. Meaning, you'll never place an incredibly high importance on any one chick when you have 4 others to turn to. If one girl can't hang out, I'm sure one of the other 4 will be able to. This not only keeps you geninuely busy (Don Juan 101) but also keeps you from becoming too emotionally invested in one chick too soon. It also (most importantly) makes a high quality, relationship material type chick stand out from the bunch.
You need to get rid of your inner fear. Don't have your brother get girls #'s for you, that's weak (I realize this is probably a rare occurance, but still). Girls want the guy who has a busy life, who's always doing something exciting and most importantly is is taking care of his $hit!! You also can't complain if you don't make an effort. If your not out there talking to girls everyday, how do you expect to attract any? I bet you right now, there are a few girls who jock you and you don't even know it because you haven't picked up on their non-verbal signs of attraction.
PS: Drop this chick, she will only use you to stroke her ego now, meaning she might call you every once in a while, but she'll still pull the "busy" card and if she does hang out with you she won't give you anything....
PIMP
theguy351 said:spoke to her today..i initiated cause i had something i wanted to tell her....didnt ask to chill just texted for a little bit..10 or so messages...
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
problem is im a bit of a narcissist and i rarely ever actually like girls i go out wiht....i really really liked her....but it figures that the one that i really like would be the one to do this to me.Pimp-sicle said:Dude GET OVER HER! Seriously, you are making yourself look like a bigger chump everytime you contact her. I don't care if you had a simple question or not, she's seriously retarded and immature. Don't tell me you can't do better than this b-itch?
STOP FEEDING THE BEAST!!
Last time I'm warning you.....I smell a serious case of one-itis in your future...
PIMP
In order of importance:theguy351 said:we get to her house, she says shes working til 8 today, if i wanna hang tonight, im like yea i want to. so shes like "im gonna give u a peck again." and pecks me...so im like "just a peck?" and shes like "yea!" (laughing and joking, thats how we are) and im like "come on!" and shes like "yea" and then i was kinda not thinking and said "what do u not like me?" (but still in the joking manner) and she just smiled and didnt answer (obv nervous to say whatever) and shes like "hey man ur not gonna peer pressure me" (joking) and ****....then i said id call her and drove away.
1.) stop being a huge douchebag, this is the internet.DonJuan11 said:In order of importance:
1) Learn how to spell
2) Type in sentences and not like you are 13
3) Make your stories clearer and with less detail, we don't need to know she picked you up at 5:47 and you coughed at that time
4) Begging for a kiss and begging to the girl to admit she likes you...not very DJnish. It's ok, at least now she knows no other girls are willing to kiss you.
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
yea who cares?suavesuave said:dated 5 guys...that cave must have been explored 500 times already.
bump for this tidbittheguy351 said:so she texts me today out of the blue and talks like we did at the beginning then asks me if we can hang tonight. i said im going out with some people and she said well maybe we can meet up. i said hit me up later. wtf....