"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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The running of the bulls: Would you go?

ShizamDaMan

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Oh boo hoo, you could get hurt running with the bulls.

Realize that you could die while going to work in the morning. You could die in your sleep. You could die eating lunch from a restaurant. You could die at any time in your life.

If you really want to run with the bulls, do it. At least what's going to kill you is right behind you instead of God knows where. Having said that, when I get some money I plan to do it before I die.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Phoenix_of_the_ashes

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Running with the bulls is the stupist **** Ive ever heard of.

If all you guys are so tough and want to show how hardcore you all are, why dont you go to war or some**** like that. Or would that be a little too dangerous?
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Originally posted by Phoenix_of_the_ashes
Running with the bulls is the stupist **** Ive ever heard of.

If all you guys are so tough and want to show how hardcore you all are, why dont you go to war or some**** like that. Or would that be a little too dangerous?
So you are saying that inlisted men are fighting just to prove they're hardcore, huh?:rolleyes: Is that why you joined up? You are in the service, aren't you?
 

undesputable

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I dont know bc someone asking on the internet and i answering on the internet would not be accurate as to what i would really do... right here i might say oh hell yea any day lets go!!! when in reality if im there with the bulls about to be let loose i might change my mind.

I dont think anyone can say until theyre theyre there.
 

Levex

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That idea is about as bright as trying to cross the Belt Parkway in NYC during rush hour. Same premise.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Phoenix_of_the_ashes

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Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
So you are saying that inlisted men are fighting just to prove they're hardcore, huh?:rolleyes: Is that why you joined up? You are in the service, aren't you?
I never said that, but if its closeness to death that your searching for then why not join armed forces.

Why do you think Im inlisted?
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Originally posted by Phoenix_of_the_ashes
I never said that, but if its closeness to death that your searching for then why not join armed forces.

Why do you think Im inlisted?
Just assuming by the way you were speaking about going to war and killing to prove someone was hardcore. So what do you do? Are you hardcore?
 

Phoenix_of_the_ashes

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Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
Just assuming by the way you were speaking about going to war and killing to prove someone was hardcore. So what do you do? Are you hardcore?
Did I say I was hardcore?
 

FOL!!!

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I hate bull running or fighting...it's just lame. Fight someone else in a match in a ring...be a man, go freefight...or whatever.
I don't dislike bull running because it is dangerous (hell...I drive motorcycle and sometimes drive 150+ mph (250+ km/h), but hurting animals like that...is just lame.

But a bit more ontopic I guess:

You only lived if you do what you wanted to do. (or at least a few of those things).
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Originally posted by Phoenix_of_the_ashes
Did I say I was hardcore?
No, I was just giving you the benifit of the doubt since I don't believe anyone else thinks so anyway.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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familyguyfan

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Originally posted by Levex
That idea is about as bright as trying to cross the Belt Parkway in NYC during rush hour. Same premise.
Well that's not too difficult since the traffic is many times at a dead stop during rush hour in NY.
 
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