You are depessed, you are a WRECK! You feel shallow and Hollow in the inside... So you seek Sex, Weed, Drugs and whatever you can do to get yourself to feel good and get you out of that "STATE" But what happens????
You go back into that state, and it feels terrible..... You thought this joint would do it, the next paycheck would do it, or the next hot girls would do it but it doesn't!!! It's and endless cycle!!! You are sick of it, some people commit suicide, some people live a scary fear driven life with no happiness..... You don't know what to do!!!
!!!
I realized something today..... something very terrible about me.... something that I hate and despise so much that it made me sick to be me!!!
I found out that I was such an bad person. I didn't pay attention to my brother or take care of him... rarely if I ever did, I didn't spend time with my family or take care of my mother who isn't in the best shape of her health... I have no connection with my father and everytime we meed I wish I didn't have a father like him or I just plain ignore him... I go to my klasses everyday with a purpose of fukking *****es and being the most popular guy in the whole fukkin schoolll... and If I get rejected or if my class mates don't pay attention to me I GET PISSED!! I get irritated, why not? I am the best looking, strongest and I got many girlfriends so why can't I be HAPPY?
I just realized that I was such a selfish, jealous fukking prick that is just plain stupid.... I despise my ways, my ignorance and what I did up until this point so I think its time for a CHANGE!!!! Time to go do some goods, time to spend some parents with my brother and parents, time to help out all my friends and not just be driven so I can penetrate a 4 cm hole....
You go back into that state, and it feels terrible..... You thought this joint would do it, the next paycheck would do it, or the next hot girls would do it but it doesn't!!! It's and endless cycle!!! You are sick of it, some people commit suicide, some people live a scary fear driven life with no happiness..... You don't know what to do!!!
I realized something today..... something very terrible about me.... something that I hate and despise so much that it made me sick to be me!!!
I found out that I was such an bad person. I didn't pay attention to my brother or take care of him... rarely if I ever did, I didn't spend time with my family or take care of my mother who isn't in the best shape of her health... I have no connection with my father and everytime we meed I wish I didn't have a father like him or I just plain ignore him... I go to my klasses everyday with a purpose of fukking *****es and being the most popular guy in the whole fukkin schoolll... and If I get rejected or if my class mates don't pay attention to me I GET PISSED!! I get irritated, why not? I am the best looking, strongest and I got many girlfriends so why can't I be HAPPY?
I just realized that I was such a selfish, jealous fukking prick that is just plain stupid.... I despise my ways, my ignorance and what I did up until this point so I think its time for a CHANGE!!!! Time to go do some goods, time to spend some parents with my brother and parents, time to help out all my friends and not just be driven so I can penetrate a 4 cm hole....