long story short, i've dating this girl for like 2 months we had an INCREDIBLE time together, things began turning cold for the past week, yesterday we decided to talk to see what was going on, and she told me her ex bf began to call her again saying her a lot of things btw she broke with him like 7 months ago and only stayed together like 3 months, she told me she wanted everything with me that I was better than him in all aspects and all that BS but she felt something for him and wanted to "clear" those feelings before we started something serious, I felt betrayed and disappointed, told her to fix her problems and i left, what do you guys think? should I stop talking to her, or should I fight for what I want, I get mixed tips from my friends and I dont know what to follow. thanks
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
The power of the ex-bf
- Thread starter david_r
- Start date
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
girlsarecrazy
Senior Don Juan
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Never fight for what you want through words.
Have this mindset: She's not going anywhere, she will not just get over you in one day.
Now what i am suggesting is to go on a break, end phone conversations, don't call her, try to keep busy, and act like you are living with your normal life happily. Don't get jealous, don't confess how much you love her, etc. It will drive her intrest level up and I think you will do fine.
Have this mindset: She's not going anywhere, she will not just get over you in one day.
Now what i am suggesting is to go on a break, end phone conversations, don't call her, try to keep busy, and act like you are living with your normal life happily. Don't get jealous, don't confess how much you love her, etc. It will drive her intrest level up and I think you will do fine.
yeah I think thats the better thing to do, and once again i have proved that women are emotion driven and thats what i cant understand she told me logic told her to go with me but she still had some insecurity, im better than his ex in every way that you guys know, looks, money-power, personality etc and still with all this in my side he was able to plant some insecurity in her and thats what disappoints me.
The Bad Ass Canadian
Master Don Juan
I've been in that situation a few times. It always sucks when the ex BF decides to try and get involved again. You meet somone who you click with really well and everything is great for a month or two, then bam... the Ex is back in the picture.
My advice is to just cut her off. Tell her you won't have anything to do with a triangle and that it's entirely for her to work her sh!t out. Tell her you really think she's a great girl and that there's the potential for you two to share something good, but you won't have any part of her issues with her ex. If, and when she sorts it out, she can come find you.
Leave it at that.
You save your pride and you tell her exactly how it's gonna be.
You need to stick to this plan, too. Cut her off, until she comes back. If she doesn't come around in a few weeks, move on.
My advice is to just cut her off. Tell her you won't have anything to do with a triangle and that it's entirely for her to work her sh!t out. Tell her you really think she's a great girl and that there's the potential for you two to share something good, but you won't have any part of her issues with her ex. If, and when she sorts it out, she can come find you.
Leave it at that.
You save your pride and you tell her exactly how it's gonna be.
You need to stick to this plan, too. Cut her off, until she comes back. If she doesn't come around in a few weeks, move on.
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
This is why you should never be the "rebound guy."
I hate to say it brother, but you're probably screwed. UNLESS she is a really honest, loyal and confident chick who can DECIDE once and for all to let the ex go forever and be with you. Unfortunately, most chicks are NOT like this, and even if you tell her that she cannot talk to him and she agrees, she still might behind your back. It's an ugly truth, but it's there nonetheless, so you should know about it. My advice: don't get into anything serious with her right now. Don't force her to do anything. Let some time pass and if she comes to you and tells you ON HER OWN that she's decided to let him go for good, then you know you've got something. This is the only way it's going to work; it has to be HER decidion, of her own FREE WILL.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
No, not at all (unless you are a vulture circling around her relationship to be the first to pick at it's carcass). If you find out that a woman is just out of a LTR, put her low on you sarge list. See her enough just to let her remember you.mountain said:won't you always be the rebound guy with any reasonably attractive girl?
Some other guy will jump up quickly to go out with her a handful of times until her baggage makes them leave or she decides to go back to her ex. Either way, let her get her dating legs under her again and get the ex out of her system before you put any serious effort into her.
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.