"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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The Only Three Reasons She Left You

bigneil

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There are only three reasons a woman will leave a man (according to Jim Wolfe)

1) She never liked you to begin with - She was only interested in dinner, money, concerts, etc.
2) She liked you but you messed up - Examine what went wrong. You lowered her interest somehow.
3) She liked you and you didn't mess up - You chose the wrong girl.

source:
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Urbanyst

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Don't really agree with #2.

The only way a man can "mess up" is by not providing VALUE or by having less VALUE than another man she can attract emotionally. Everything else is just BS excuses women use to leave you that are not usually the true reason. #2 also suggests that its worth compromising yourself to keep a woman who will leave you anyway lol. Waste of time and energy.

I come out of break ups much more at peace when I don't compromise myself in any way.
 

bigneil

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Don't really agree with #2.

The only way a man can "mess up" is by not providing VALUE or by having less VALUE than another man she can attract emotionally. Everything else is just BS excuses women use to leave you that are not usually the true reason. #2 also suggests that its worth compromising yourself to keep a woman who will leave you anyway lol. Waste of time and energy.

I come out of break ups much more at peace when I don't compromise myself in any way.
In a binary sense, though, there are two switches:

a) She didn't like you. (END)
OR
A) She liked you.

if A, then we have:

b) You messed up.
OR
B) You didn't mess up.

(END)
 

Trump

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I come out of break ups much more at peace when I don't compromise myself in any way.
Just curious, can you explain "in any way?"

Good looking 26 year old girl is in love with you and wants to get married but needs a few compromises. You would say no and break up with her?

If you would I am impressed. To be with a young girl seems like it is so so important nowadays. All the guys I know in their 30s would bend over backwards to have a good looking wife to be with and have sex with.
 

soulforge

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My relationship simply ended because she continued to disrespect me..

Why did she disrespect me? VALUE

She valued money and status...

If you where taking her 3-4 holidays a year, buying her nice jewellery, taking her to the best restaurants..

Do you really think she would disrespect you? Not a fuking chance!
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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skinnyguy

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I usually break up with them first. Or I just go ghost. I have extremely low tolerance. If a girl does leave me, I never regret it cause I would never want to be with a woman who is low interest. If I have to work that hard to keep her interested, she was never mine to begin with.
 

Meektrop

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My relationship simply ended because she continued to disrespect me..

Why did she disrespect me? VALUE

She valued money and status...

If you where taking her 3-4 holidays a year, buying her nice jewellery, taking her to the best restaurants..

Do you really think she would disrespect you? Not a fuking chance!
Don't beat yourself up too much. How many women can realisticly get that? In this economy?

It's her loss your value isnt determined by material wealth, no matter what THEY think
 

bigneil

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She valued money and status...If you where taking her 3-4 holidays a year, buying her nice jewellery, taking her to the best restaurants.. Do you really think she would disrespect you? Not a fuking chance!
Not sure this is true. If anything, buying her things when there is no attraction causes more disrespect.

I spoil girls but only because I'm a total control freak and they are ejected if they don't fulfil their role of ideal woman.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

nismo-4

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5) You fell out of first place.

You're always competing for a woman even in a relationship. If you're not first, you're last. Analyze your value.

A breakup happens when you fail to beat out her competition or she wanted you in a different role (beta provider) and your values didn't align. The latter is the better outcome, but the former can hurt like hell.
 

devilkingx2

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Don't really agree with #2.

The only way a man can "mess up" is by not providing VALUE or by having less VALUE than another man she can attract emotionally. Everything else is just BS excuses women use to leave you that are not usually the true reason. #2 also suggests that its worth compromising yourself to keep a woman who will leave you anyway lol. Waste of time and energy.

I come out of break ups much more at peace when I don't compromise myself in any way.
what if she catches you fvcking the babysitter and you have to decide whether or not smashing the babysitter was the bad idea or being so sloppy that you got caught was where you went wrong
 

bigneil

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what if she catches you fvcking the babysitter and you have to decide whether or not smashing the babysitter was the bad idea or being so sloppy that you got caught was where you went wrong
2) She liked you and you messed up.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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bigneil

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Of course there is messing up. Try texting your girl 29 straight times and see how much value she perceives.
 

Urbanyst

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Of course there is messing up. Try texting your girl 29 straight times and see how much value she perceives.
That's not something I would ever do because its not in my personality. But if a guy were to do that.. he is just revealing his personality. Is revealing your personality "messing up?" Depends on your goals. If you just want sex sure. If you want compatibility there is no such thing as messing up.
 

bigneil

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That's not something I would ever do because its not in my personality. But if a guy were to do that.. he is just revealing his personality. Is revealing your personality "messing up?" Depends on your goals. If you just want sex sure. If you want compatibility there is no such thing as messing up.
If your personality is "stalker", yes, you messed up.

An alpha male takes responsibility ALWAYS. Are you suggesting he take responsibility NEVER??
 

zekko

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By the way. A lot of men cheat and the woman stays. Why? VALUE.
A lot of men cheat and the woman stays. Why? Poor self esteem.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

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