"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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The official kiss my ass thread

P

Paradox

Master Don Juan
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Credit card debt--you can kiss my ass. I know it's my fault but you can still kiss my ass

All of the women whe did not call me back---Kiss my ass. There's more women out there. Dummies.

Flaky women--See above comments

My ex-supervisor---Who went back to their old drug habit. Enjoy rehab for the second time. Kiss my ass.

My online stalker---Karma is a B1tch. Kiss my ass you fuk1n fruitcake.
 
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"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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K

KontrollerX

Master Don Juan
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*Waits for Vince Mcmahon to come out and accuse Paradox of stealing his gimmick*
 
R

reset

Master Don Juan
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Text wrangler program which is picky about saving html files with certain characters, even though these same characters work in other documents--kma.
 
K

Ken785

Master Don Juan
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all the women that ive dated that thought i needed their approval...KISS MY AS$!!! B1tch you need mine!!
 
penkitten

penkitten

Master Don Juan
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at our house
Paradox said:
Credit card debt--you can kiss my ass. I know it's my fault but you can still kiss my ass
Click to expand...
yah, what he said !
kiss my ass dillard's and stop calling my job! i paid your payments, stop calling me!

kiss my ass ex resident that i evicted for nonpayment of rent who just complained more than 6 months later that i "discriminated" against your handicap. no i didnt, you should have paid your rent. now kiss my ass.

kiss my ass department of you know what that sent the letter to me today , who needs me to write them a response within ten days of the date of this letter to prove i did not discriminate upon handicap boy. no way in hell, did i have time to harass or intimidate handicap boy . i just sent a late rent letter that you approved.

kiss my ass bitter souls who take no responsibility for their own actions and blame others trying to win a law suit.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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C

ChrizZ

Master Don Juan
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All the pregnant women I kicked in the belly ...KISS MY A$$!!!
 
M

mpimpin

Master Don Juan
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Bama
ChrizZ said:
All the pregnant women I kicked in the belly ...KISS MY A$$!!!
Click to expand...
:eek:
 
V

ValleyDJing

Master Don Juan
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ChrizZ said:
All the pregnant women I kicked in the belly ...KISS MY A$$!!!
Click to expand...
Why would you even joke about something like that?! I prefer to meet them at the top of a staircase. :rockon:
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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T

thehexman

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My professors who gran us generous vacations beffiting college students (4 weeks) -- kiss my hairy ass!

The girl I met on the train and didn't even pick up the phone -- kiss my balls!

Friend who moved away and never calls, writes or anything -- kiss my ass!

Girl I am going to meet today -- bend over and take it in the ass!
 
BMX

BMX

Master Don Juan
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Lady at home depot today...kiss my ass!
Online english class...kiss my ass!
 
M

Mr.Positive

Master Don Juan
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To all the defeatists, the nay-sayers, all the negative sons o b!tches plaguing our society....kiss MY ASS!!
 
T

ThunderMaverick

Master Don Juan
Joined
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To people saying things that they don't mean...KISS MY ASS

The cop who pulled me over and said "I'm going to tow your car because you don't care about paying your tickets"....KISS MY ASS.

To the man who's making it harder and harder to live in your own place while working more than 40 hours a week on 10 bucks...KISS MY ASS

To having to search for another job only to be turned down over and over again...KISS MY ASS!!

To the part of me who says I'll never be what I want to be...KISS MY ASS!!!!!

To having parents that couldn't support me when they should have...KISS MY ASS!!!

AGH!! KISS MY ASS!! KISS MY ASS!!
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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